Stroller advice/ suggestions PLEASE!! !

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LittleMama
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02 Jan 2012, 6:09 am

I know this is a "hot" issue these days. I have two kids, both aspies, both too old (by American definition) to be in a stroller, and both hate leaving the house ever! The only way to get them out the door without getting beat up too much is to use their stroller. They are getting too big for their Joovy sit n stand. They need something where they can come and go when they want to by themselves (they are willing to get out sometimes but need to know that they are safe to climb black in on their own when sensory overload comes on). They can not look at each other or share a head rest (like in the Joovy). They must have an umbrella cover, or some way to attach something so they can hide from the world as needed. They also prefer something with the option to recline, lay down, and close their eyes when things get really tough.

They are 3 and 6 years old. They are real tiny for their ages, but are finally putting on some weight and growing (I took them out of the school system and they are finally blossoming).

We are going back East to visit family in a few weeks, and I really need something for the airports. I had thought of a wagon, but have yet to find one that is durable enough to withstand the abuse my kids would do to it. Plus, I can't find a durable one that weighs under 45 pounds (I seem incapable of lifting more than that). Adding a ramp to my car is not an option.

Does anyone know of such an invention? Anyone willing to build it? I don't have much money, but I'd give everything we have and then some for such an invention.
Thanks so much



aann
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02 Jan 2012, 6:23 am

Did you look at jogging strollers? They seem to be more durable but also lighter. Just a suggestion.



Eureka-C
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02 Jan 2012, 9:42 am

Its hard to find tandem strollers for older children, but you can find single person strollers for older children by searching for "strollers special needs", then you could add a stroller connector like Munchkin stroller links. Many of the special needs stroller go up to weight limits of 80 to 100 pounds, which should help you out for quite a while. You might have to dig to find the ones that are not like wheelchairs and are not too costly.

BTW here is a side by side stroller with a 100 pound weight limit (I think that is with both kids in it)

http://www.amazon.com/Baby-Jogger-Doubl ... 82&sr=1-12



audball
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02 Jan 2012, 11:34 am

I saw a day-care worker (or very busy mom!) with five kids in tow. Two of them were sitting in a portable wagon. I did an online "google" search and found the On The Edge Utility Wagon.

It looks like it collapses, has a 100 lbs.+ weight capacity, but I'm not sure how small it collapses down to for air travel. The price looks like it ranges from $90-$145 (US).

On The Edge Utility Wagon



Chronos
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03 Jan 2012, 7:10 am

LittleMama wrote:
I know this is a "hot" issue these days. I have two kids, both aspies, both too old (by American definition) to be in a stroller, and both hate leaving the house ever! The only way to get them out the door without getting beat up too much is to use their stroller. They are getting too big for their Joovy sit n stand. They need something where they can come and go when they want to by themselves (they are willing to get out sometimes but need to know that they are safe to climb black in on their own when sensory overload comes on). They can not look at each other or share a head rest (like in the Joovy). They must have an umbrella cover, or some way to attach something so they can hide from the world as needed. They also prefer something with the option to recline, lay down, and close their eyes when things get really tough.

They are 3 and 6 years old. They are real tiny for their ages, but are finally putting on some weight and growing (I took them out of the school system and they are finally blossoming).

We are going back East to visit family in a few weeks, and I really need something for the airports. I had thought of a wagon, but have yet to find one that is durable enough to withstand the abuse my kids would do to it. Plus, I can't find a durable one that weighs under 45 pounds (I seem incapable of lifting more than that). Adding a ramp to my car is not an option.

Does anyone know of such an invention? Anyone willing to build it? I don't have much money, but I'd give everything we have and then some for such an invention.
Thanks so much


I would break the 6 year old of using the stroller. It will likely be unpleasant, but it is going to have to happen eventually and I think younger is better than later in this situation. You have to understand that most children with AS are very adverse to change but in some instances, it's appropriate to force them out of their comfort zone, otherwise they will never leave it. Letting them stay in some places in life will prove ultimately detrimental. For example, I am starting to hear of teens and young adults with AS who have non-social life skills delays. This does not inherently exist with AS, and is acquired the same way NT children acquire such delays. They were never taught or tasks with performing such skills themselves.



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03 Jan 2012, 9:43 am

I sort of agree with Chronos. It would seem obvious that you would have to ween them from the stroller over the next few years. However, I can only imagine the difficulty of dealing with two children with sensitivities at the same time. There are times to use resources we have and if the stroller makes it easier on busy days when you just need to get things done, then if I were you, I would have no guilt using that tool. The time for getting out of the stroller would be planned trips for the specific purpose of practicing without the stroller. It may also be easier to practice those trips with them one at a time and let them learn some individual skills before expecting them both together to be in those places.



LittleMama
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24 Feb 2012, 6:02 am

Thank you to all who offered constructive advice. Chronos, I have no idea what you are talking about or how using a stroller at age 6 will cause major deficits later in life. Please feel free to share how you came to this conclusion and what articles you are eluding too.

To any other Moms or Dads out there brave enough to continue to use a stroller despite our society's bizarre hatred of it, I have finally found the solution. Apparently, in 2008, right before the economy plummeted, Fisher-Price released a "Kid Utility Vehicle." It is a 2 seater on a wagon base. It is pulled like a wagon. Each seat faces inward towards each other, and each child has his/her own canopy to shield them from the outside world. Instead of the usual 4 fragile wheels most strollers have, this one is like an 18-wheeler truck, and doubles each wheel so that each corner has two wheels side by side. My kids love it so much! It was made specifically to fit larger children. I think it can handle up to 130+ lbs.

Interesting enough, Fisher-Price stopped production once the economy tanked and this sudden hatred of strollers appeared. Personally I think it is just a way for some people to get their mind off of the economy and the poor choices they made (since before 2008 there were no hatred blogs on use of strollers that I know of). But, that's just my Aspie theory.

Good luck all, and thanks for writing to me.
Look on Craigslist and Ebay if you want one.



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24 Feb 2012, 11:14 am

http://www.newegg.com/Product/Product.a ... 06E000IQC9

A wagon is useful. You can also haul along the groceries, and when the kids no longer need it for transportation they'll enjoy playing with it.


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liloleme
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24 Feb 2012, 2:30 pm

I think Jogging strollers are the best idea if they are small.....the double ones are big but they are worth it. I am getting my daughter a McClaren (sp?) big kid stroller through our insurance because she has hyperflexible joints and weak leg muscles so when we go shopping she will lay on the floor in the middle of the store. Im already in a wheel chair, its a rental until I get my own and its not electric so my 9 year old Aspie has to push me....scary! Then my husband has to push the cart....and you see this is not going to work. So we are hoping my electric chair comes when her chair comes, this way we can actually go places together.



LittleMama
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24 Feb 2012, 2:42 pm

Awesome feedback, PenguinMom. That's a really good point!



LittleMama
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24 Feb 2012, 2:51 pm

Liloleme, I think my son is the same way. His doctors just won't give him a formal diagnosis and the school won't help him.
Although I'm not in a wheelchair, my right leg is almost constantly in a cast, and is pretty useless.
Nothing worse than when Mommy can't walk, kiddos can't either, and everyone is going stir crazy.
I wish you the best



shrox
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24 Feb 2012, 2:55 pm

I have read and heard that a stroller should face rearward, so the child can see the parent. Babies don't have a sense of permanence until a certain age. With a forward facing stroller, mommy is out of view and therefore mommy is gone!

While it doesn't apply at 6. it's just a thought.



liloleme
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25 Feb 2012, 5:50 am

Littlemama, when I lived in the US they would not give my daughter Physical therapy and even told me, as my OT suggested it, that OT's say that about every autistic kid. I thought that was rude and its obvious they just dont want to pay for something like that (the stroller or the PT) unless the kid can not walk. I felt like telling them to try taking my daughter out shopping or to let her walk anywhere. She has already broken her elbow so we are careful with her. We tell her school that if she gets tried to let her stop if they are running or doing sports.....she will start tripping and falling. Many kids DO have loose joints and low muscle tone, either small or large. Look up Ehlers-Danlos syndrome (there are a few different types and one is the hyper flexible joint type)....here is a good link http://www.ednf.org/
Also look up Ehlers-Danlos and Autism....you will be surprised at how many links you come up with. I believe there is a link between the two and it could also be the reason why I have as much pain as I do. I do have Ankylosing Spondylitis which is genetic and in my family but my doctors think there is something else and Ehlers-Danlos syndrome (hyper flexible joint type) can cause serious joint pain and early osteoporosis and stenosis all of which I also have, and nerve damage....I have severe large nerve damage...my SI's. So I have a lot of pain and my joints are fusing....fun! *sarcasm*.
Anyway, maybe if you can get your regular doc to diagnose your son with Ehlers-Danlos syndrome then they would have no choice but to give him PT and possibly a wheel chair. Also kids who are runners can typically get a chair....you just need to be pushy!
Also just so you know Ehlers-Danlos syndrome can also be in conjunction with other diseases like POTS which my 19 is currently being assessed for and Mitro valve prolapse, that runs in my Dads side of the family and my 21 year old has a heart murmur and she is going to be checked for that and to see if she has Mitro Valve prolapse......all my kids have been very flexible aside from my recently deceased son, just like me. it can also cause some skin issues.
If you want to know what POTS is you can look that up....My daughter started fainting and having seizure like jerking when she stood up from sitting, we now know that her heart rate goes from 40 laying down to 120 when she stands....its an autonomic disease. Also her legs turn purple as her blood pools into her legs and digestive system. She has pain in her stomach and intestines and she gets horrible headaches and "fuzzy" head to the point where you cant have a conversation with her because all the blood is draining from her brain. She has to lay down.
This is all crazy stuff and Im surprised that, as far as I know, no one is looking into this link.

I also forgot to mention that me, and my son 9 and my 19 year old daughter along with my 6 year old all have ASD and we all have hyperflexible joints.....My 21 year old has sensory and auditory processing disorder and also hyperflexable joints and the heart issues....but my 19 year old obviously has worse issues but its not just her heart its her autonomic nervous system...everything the body controls without us even being conscious of it.



LittleMama
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02 Mar 2012, 11:15 pm

Thank you so much, liloleme, for your reply. I keep forgetting about the hyperflexible joints. You have given me so much to think about and look into. Thank you so much for this. Thank you also for being so supportive.

I do hope that your situation gets better. Thank you



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03 Mar 2012, 8:57 am

Chronos wrote:
LittleMama wrote:
I know this is a "hot" issue these days. I have two kids, both aspies, both too old (by American definition) to be in a stroller, and both hate leaving the house ever! The only way to get them out the door without getting beat up too much is to use their stroller. They are getting too big for their Joovy sit n stand. They need something where they can come and go when they want to by themselves (they are willing to get out sometimes but need to know that they are safe to climb black in on their own when sensory overload comes on). They can not look at each other or share a head rest (like in the Joovy). They must have an umbrella cover, or some way to attach something so they can hide from the world as needed. They also prefer something with the option to recline, lay down, and close their eyes when things get really tough.

They are 3 and 6 years old. They are real tiny for their ages, but are finally putting on some weight and growing (I took them out of the school system and they are finally blossoming).

We are going back East to visit family in a few weeks, and I really need something for the airports. I had thought of a wagon, but have yet to find one that is durable enough to withstand the abuse my kids would do to it. Plus, I can't find a durable one that weighs under 45 pounds (I seem incapable of lifting more than that). Adding a ramp to my car is not an option.

Does anyone know of such an invention? Anyone willing to build it? I don't have much money, but I'd give everything we have and then some for such an invention.
Thanks so much


I would break the 6 year old of using the stroller. It will likely be unpleasant, but it is going to have to happen eventually and I think younger is better than later in this situation. You have to understand that most children with AS are very adverse to change but in some instances, it's appropriate to force them out of their comfort zone, otherwise they will never leave it. Letting them stay in some places in life will prove ultimately detrimental. For example, I am starting to hear of teens and young adults with AS who have non-social life skills delays. This does not inherently exist with AS, and is acquired the same way NT children acquire such delays. They were never taught or tasks with performing such skills themselves.


I agree that the 6-year-old needs to stop using the stroller. It is socially unacceptable at age 6, and the child will need to give it up sooner or later anyway.

That said, I know that it can be painful to break the stoller thing. I used a double stoller with my two boys until my older son was 4.5 years old (he is short). To break it and enable us to leave the house, I had to hire a part-time mother's helper (check out sittercity.com or care.com). She would come over to our house three mornings a week during the summer school vacation to help with field trips. I would handle one child, and she would handle the other on the field trips. We would choose places without too much sensory overload and leave whenever my older son started showing signs of elevated anxiety.

My husband is not very good with the kids, and I have a weak back, so I needed help with the kids on these field trips.

My younger son, who is four, is very tall and has not used his stroller since just after age 3. It was scary to break him of the stroller thing--walking to school with both kids, one hand in each of mine. However, he was ready, and he adapted.

If you are unable to get any help with the kids when you try to break them of the stroller thing, you might try walks in your own neighborhood, very close to home, first. Walk the same path every time and see what happens.


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LittleMama
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03 Mar 2012, 10:38 am

Thank you blondambition, but I guess we will have to agree to disagree.

I guess I will never understand why NT's get so angry and feel it is so unacceptable for a child who is 6 to be in a stroller. I just don't get why you all feel the need to pass judgement and tell us what we can and can't do.

In case anyone missed this point, the school district has pretty much decided that I must homeschool my kids. They refuse to help. They just want the money for the IEP services, but not to actually deliver the services delineated in the IEP. I have tried to get special sitters to come watch my 2 kids, but they have all been too scared to stay. Besides, I can't afford a sitter anyway. They charge over $20 an hour. So, I have no money, no help from the school, no sitters, no family and no friends to help. As I previously mentioned, I only have one working leg and I think I may have fractured that leg's toes. My husband works 24/7. Someone has to get groceries and medicine. How else am I supposed to get to the grocery store with 2 kids who are either bolting into traffic, freaking out screaming and throwing things from sensory overload, or beating their heads onto the grocery's hard floor tiles. Then, if I try to physically stop them, I get beat up more.

I stated in my original post that I knew this was a hot topic and I was seeking advice on stroller models, NOT looking for people's two cents on their position on this battle.

Please, would some NT out there explain to me why it's so vitally important to our society that I, personally, must be denied a stroller and be forced to live in an even deeper level of hell than I am currently in, just to win your approval? What does your approval get me? Food for my children - no. Medicine to help them - no. Someone to be physically here to help me - no. I get nothing. Absolutely nothing but your utterly useless and worthless so-called approval.

Don't you NT's get it? Your approval means nothing to us. We are impervious to your stupid peer pressure. I came here, to WrongPlanet, to find solace and compassion with my kindred spirits. Not to endure more NT bullying.

Steven Hawking is in a "stroller." I don't hear anyone going after him. He too is a genius whose physical body can't keep up with his brain. Do you judge him? How is my situation different? My children's bodies also can't keep up with their genius. Just because his disability is more easily visible, you seem to think it's OK for him to use a wheel chair. Just because my children are beautiful and don't appear to be physically handicapped doesn't make their disability any less real. It also doesn't make their disability any less of an impairment.

Stop trying to control us. Stop trying to bully and intimidate us. Just be glad that we're too anti-social and physically awkward to form a union that will rise up against you.