NT siblings copying negative behavior

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How do those with younger siblings to your ASD child deal with the imitation of negative behavior?? My 3yo copies a lot of her big bros behaviors, as well as one of his friends behaviors. His friend is around a lot, and he has terrible behavior...and my daughter idolizes him. she has picked up a lot of behaviors that make me very sad. I feel as if my child has been corrupted, and I dont know how to get rid of those behaviors. I sent her to pre school to give her a break from them, and to have her around some typical kids her age. She LOVES school, is doing great and having no issues there. I am so happy for her that she has a place of her own, where she can have fun and be around typical kids her age!

When she is alone, or they arent around, she is such a great kid. She speaks nice, plays nice, her behavior is completely different in their absence.

She is only 3 so I dont know how to fix this? She seems to enjoy when I repromand or redirect her as I do the boys, almost like she feels like a big kid or like them.

I cant be alone in this, I know people in RL who have this issue but none have any suggestions...lol. I hope as she gets older she realizes this isnt the best way to go, but for now at 3 she is very impressionable and unfortunately spends most her time with her bro and his friend who dont model he best behaviors...

Yep, my 2-year-old idolizes his older bro, follows him around, and picks up lots of bad habits (like only eating the cheese on pizza.)

He's still only two so it's kind of hard to do much besides keep him out of trouble...at least he's learning his numbers and ABC's from his big brother!

I have a 5yo AS daughter and a 1yo NT (so far!) daughter and the baby absolutely loves her big sis, despite the fact that she never plays with her, she just takes her toys to line up and turns her back on the baby! Already she copies her and screams at the top of her voice when her sister screams!

Yep. Right down to the melt downs. It's so bad I can't tell if she might have AS or is just a copy cat.

It is so hard... she is almost 3 1/2 and didnt start to really get into the big brother negative behavior imitation until a few months ago. It is sad casue she so idolizes him and just wants to be with him, doing what he is doing, and now acting like him. If I didnt see her acting so typical when he wasnt around I would worry...but I know she is just copying.

I am struggling with this myself. DD6 (NT) mimics DS9 when we get to school. He really needs my help to transition from home to school (it is really hard for him and he is often in tears). DD6 who loves school and is very social, has started mimicking DS9 by clinging on to me and making sad faces before she goes into her class - I know she LOVES school, so I know it is fake, but it is a real bid for my attention (which is usually focused on DS in the mornings). It is hard not get mad at her. I try really hard to ignore the behavior and redirect her attention (e.g., if I see one of her friends, I say oh look Madeline is here, would you like to play with her before class?). Sometimes it works.

Lots and lots of reinforcing their good and positive behaviours. Making special time for the NT kids as sometimes their needs get overlooked and attention can be hard to come by. Then just keep doing this. They will learn that being good is much more enjoyable than copying negative behaviours. If they are NT and no other behavioural issues they will be able to control themselves in this way and will want to be good.
Well, this works for me, eldest has severe autism and none of the younger ones (2 NT children after him) have copied him past the ages of 3ish. Youngest baby (18mths) is hitting at the moment, he got that off DS 4yrs who has PDD-NOS, but he is also copying all the good behaviours too (of all 4 older children, both NT and ASD) and getting lots of attention and praise for that. The hitting will stop soon. I'm not worried about it. Just make sure she is getting other role models and lots of praise when she's doing the right thing. Catch her being good!

thanks, yes I do catch her being good. I feel as if she would rather be like them...but hopefully as she gets older, she is only 3, she will understand that the neg behavior isnt worth it!

I also hope that my son will have better behavior as he gets older, so she will have better behavior to model. He actually said to us once that if his sister was older then him, she would probably teach him a lot of good things. He is VERY insightful, we NEVER talk about her imitating his behavior, he just came up with that on his own!

We're going through the same thing. Our older son is & on the spectrum. He's got a speech delay, impulsivity, hyperactivity, obsessions, you name it - not to mention the tendency to provoke people for his own enjoyment and hit/bite hinself and his little brother. Meanwhile, my 5yo is not delayed cognitively or developmentally and is quite sociable, though I suspect he's emotionally immature given that he gets in trouble for being disruptive in classes.

When he's with peers or alone with us he's great, though admittedly a little high strung. OTOH when he's around his brother he actually becomes the problem and will try to dominate his brother or even provoke him (albeit unknowingly) to the point of meltdown. The 5yo will get excessively silly and seems to either lose the ability to listen or becomes downright defiant -even confrontational at times.

What's worse is that sometimes he'll get this way in school. We had a bad report 2 years ago when he was in preschool and just this last week after only 2 weeks in kindergarten.

I tried having a little talk with him but I think it's essentially an extreme form of sibling rivalry where he's screaming out for attention. I only hope that he doesn't get expelled because of it. I've asked about family based.intervention because we're all stressed out.

My oldest son is 9 yrs and little brother 4yrs, almost 5 yrs. They are not geneticly connected, so I know thats not the issue.....Oldest have AS and little one was diagnosed with severe SID and speech delays.....Although some behaviour overlap, I could see in the past how some AS behaviour was moddeled by little dude, because he saw oldest gettting attention...The things that irritated me most was that little dude copied the swearing and oppositional behaviour.....
What I can say....and this is the nice part.....is that the 2 kids, because of little one not having ASD REACTS differently to dissipline!:)
When oldest is repremanded it will lead to meltdowns or more obsessive behaviour!! !:( When little dude is repremanded, he will be able to stop the behaviour, because he is able to switch gears!:) He will even say he is sorry!
So even though you might be worried the little one most propably will grow and learn social norms.....I saw that in my house....Little brother is much more aware of social norms and sometimes he almost acts as the older brother, where he will go and close the bathroom door when oldest is on the toilet and little one will tell him "it's private, he needs to close the door'! Or the little one will tell his brother to say thank you....Or the little one will come and tell and ask me if X, Y and Z is wrong behaviour!
My little one gets very sad when oldest is rude to him or hegets afraid when oldest becomes aggressive....so one of the therapists told me that I must tell youngest that when big brother gets upset, his thinking door is closed....he doesnt mean to say all that bad stuff!
I also noticed that the more little one feels he doesnt get attention, he will start acting out.....So make sure and try and remind yourself that both kids need attention!
It's very difficult and sadening!