2015 resolutions

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I am resolving to go mute for the new year. I seldom speak as it is and have no desire to speak to people any longer. People are just generally too mean for me to bother with. They enjoy hurting each other too much, especially emotional hurt. Going to minimize the probability of that happening by completely shutting myself off. I have done it for short periods before,but even though my family knows I go through these spells they always seem to think I am rejecting them when I do it. Hopefully they will respect my wishes this time and just let it go.

How about written communication?

This sounds really cool, wish I could pull it off, LOL.
Do you use sign-language?

Written is how I mainly communicate with family anyway. Other than family I try to avoid anyone else that would want me to say anything. I avoid eye contact and usually act like I don't hear people even they speak to me so people pretty much already avoid me. I am going to stop seeing Psychiatrist altogether.

I have been learning sign language. I have a few apps on my cell, and one book on sign language.

Are you sure that's going to solve the problem? That's a defeatist attitude. Humans are social beings, and deep down I'm sure you crave social interaction. Aren't you able to cut down on social interaction without shutting down? You have several family and friends that I'm sure you would like to keep in your life.

You can also learn who to trust and who not to overtime, too.

I had. Minus the actual writing for communication and sign language. (Because it was during/after 1st days of 3rd year HS) And it was funny. XD It reduces certain attention but just to gain another. (People pestering me if I could talk or not...) I ignored them all. It lasts up to 6 months.

But yes, trust issue is another factor...


That doesn't solve well. Especially to people who are worried about you.
You can have a break or vacation, but not to the extreme.
The longer you shut down, the less likely you come out again. Also the longer you're within the shell, the more vulnerable you'll become when you come out which is worse in a long run and much later.
And believe me, playing mute and isolation doesn't shield you from any forms harm.

I have exactly 0 friends, and whatever family I do have I only speak to a few times a month even though they all live within a couple miles. I loathe speaking because I am not able to express myself as effectively with my mouth as I do in writing. Also, speaking induces mania for me and I can't control everything coming out of my mouth, it flows out so quickly.

I am not sure anyone really worries about me. I barely communicate with anyone as it is. What family I do have only ask me how I am a couple times a month, always in writing. I have isolated myself all my life. I am on disability now, but even when I worked and was married I was inside the "glass jar." I do not worry about physical harm All the harm I have experienced in my life has been emotional in nature. I just see no need to expose myself any longer to those probabilities. I have been cooked too many times, but I am very emotional and extremely fragile on the emotional scale.