Transphobic tirades

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Earlier tonight, I felt like I was channeling Lord Voldemort and had a sense of purpose, power, and rightness. There were also feelings of having been wronged. So I tore into the transgender community in a way only a member of said community would be able to. As I did this, I felt my power grow and became very self-satisfied.

Then that dropped and I felt like s**t and like I wanted to die.

But I guess I deserved that last bit.

We've all done it at some point in our lives, and I don't mean be transphobic exactly.. but we've all tried to fake a superiority complex over someone to feel better about ourselves. We ALL have at some point in our life, even if we were too immature to realize it. Or too young. It's important to remember how doing it really made you feel and to learn from it so you don't feel like you need to do it again.

Beneficii, all that you've done is reveal your frustration at the trans-community, and with many valid points. Don't worry, you are not s**t, just a normal human being with feelings and opinions of your own.

Maybe your rants will help change the trans-community to be more self-reliant, instead of relying on "outsiders" for acceptance, affirmation, and advocacy. Maybe you've inspired other trans-persons to handle rejection and indifference without resorting to personal attacks against those "outsiders". Maybe what you've said will cause other trans-people to monitor their own behavior, and behave in ways that are more suitable to their gender identity.

Take care.

Thanks, Fnord. For some reason, me and the rest of the trans community never really clicked. I've never felt the trans community to be particularly supportive in any way, in any real material way, that is.

The local trans group just spends all their time talking about video games, the Japanese and Irish conceptions of the color red, movies, and other stuff that just drives me away. They have banned me from posting on their Facebook page because I was willing to bring up stuff that I guess most trans people cannot handle.

Well then, I hope this post makes a difference ... While you and I may not always agree on everything, I still like your style and your honesty. Please stick around.

-Fnord-

Thanks, Fnord.

Now I return to memories of when I did go to that trans group. It always felt like it was dominated by barely-mature IT dudes who were into all the latest game, porn, and all that crap, even though they claimed to be women. I had great difficulty referring to them with female pronouns.

In fact, there was an FtM, who had schizophrenia and managed to have a double mastectomy, who had a beard and looked masculine except for his short height. Despite that, half the time female pronouns would come to mind in describing this person and I surprisingly often had to catch myself.

My mental health professionals almost exclusively refer to me by male pronouns even though they wrote two letters of approval for sex reassignment surgery to female. I protested and they corrected, but they made the mistake again and I chose to do nothing. Later, I brought the issue up, but they denied calling me by male pronouns, said I was just making things up.

So basically for me it's whatever anyone wants to call me.

I've found a lot of the SJW groups are very, very, very passionate and stubborn about the issues they believe in. Any disagreement towards trans or gay issues generally leads to being shunned. I've also found that a universal lack of acceptance for who you are inside from your peers usually leads to depression and other outlying mental health issues. It's a seriously difficult uphill battle for acceptance among the trans community.. I have a lot of friends who claim trans in other asperger support groups, and, while I don't fully understand how they feel I do my best to accept it. But sometimes I really do feel like I'm walking on eggshells, last time I used the incorrect gender pronoun I got chewed out.

To be fair, a lot of your posts are kind of borderline offensive. I haven't interacted with you much during the time I've been here, but the two times you've drawn my attention were from rudely telling a transwoman she "NEVER" passed, and your whole rant about enabling a government amendment to prevent "trans deception". You have to understand, that from a majority perspective within the LGBT community, those both come off as pretty transmisogynistic. There's a big difference between discussing and critiquing serious issues within the trans community, and blatantly insulting people and perpetuating negative stereotypes like the "deceitful transsexual".

Yes, I am fully aware of the walking-on-eggshells phenomenon. I would really hate others to feel they'd have to do that on my account, so I generally tolerate whichever pronouns or name a person uses for me. I want the person to feel like they can act naturally around me and not have to keep reminding themselves to use pronouns or names that don't come natural to them when referring to me.

I am glad to see you post this. I read your last couple rant posts and was very confused. The posts seemed to be so angry at trans people that I wondered if somebody who was angry at you personally had stolen your password and was ranting at you in a way you would be unable to ignore. I really did think "there's no way that post was written by beneficii- somebody who is mad at him stole his password to let him know how mad they are at him with that rant".

My idea was very convoluted and luckily very wrong. It was you being legit aggravated by others in the community, not by the concept of trans itself. That's good to know. It would be very disturbing if your password actually did get stolen but now I see it didn't.