"Nurturing Instincts" and Women

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Cracked
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25 Oct 2012, 12:36 am

Kjas wrote:

Cracked wrote:

I don't know any other women with a confirmed diagnosis on the autistic spectrum, and I haven't read much about Asperger Syndrome, so I wasn't expecting a huge difference between the nurturing tendencies of NT women and women on the autistic spectrum. Now, I know I'm not consistently nurturing, but that's all I knew for sure prior to creating this poll.

I think you need to do some reading on Aspergers if that is the case.

Often it's not the fact that we "aren't", "don't", "won't" or "can't" do something like we are told so much of the time, and that is presented in the official literature on the subject by professionals - usually it is a matter that we tend to do it in a completely different way than normal - a way that is not recongised or acknowledged by NT's.

They label us with this condition because they cannot relate to us or empathize with us. Nobody labels NT's with a condition in a negative manner because they are the majority - despite they have no ablity to empathize or relate to us (the same thing they accuse us of). It is only because we are a minority that we are pathologized for how we are.

You may find that rather than being nurturing consistently to everyone in general like NT women are (which is how everyone defines nurturing, because it is the NT definition), that AS women instead to to get very attached to and nurture a toy (if we are still a child), an particular animal or a particular person to a much more intense level than is usual, and with everyone else, we nurture in a practicial way usually, as opposed to emotional.

Thanks for the insight, and I do know that I need to read up on Asperger Syndrome some more...in fact, I have a book coming in the mail that's about AS (specifically, women with AS), so I should be more informed on the subject before too long.

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Skilpadde
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27 Oct 2012, 2:24 pm

Kjas wrote:

Often it's not the fact that we "aren't", "don't", "won't" or "can't" do something like we are told so much of the time, and that is presented in the official literature on the subject by professionals - usually it is a matter that we tend to do it in a completely different way than normal - a way that is not recongised or acknowledged by NT's.

They label us with this condition because they cannot relate to us or empathize with us. Nobody labels NT's with a condition in a negative manner because they are the majority - despite they have no ablity to empathize or relate to us (the same thing they accuse us of). It is only because we are a minority that we are pathologized for how we are.

*applauds* very well put, Kjas!

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MONKEY
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27 Oct 2012, 4:14 pm

I'm quite a nurturing type and very maternal. When I was younger I always liked playing with the little kids and babies and looking after them.
I'm a bit too soft really and I end up sympathising with anyone no matter who or why, there could be some sort of person on the news that's been locked up for reeeaaaally bad crimes and I still end up feeling sorry for them that they're locked up and then wondering what's going through their minds.

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y-pod
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28 Oct 2012, 7:56 am

I don't think I'm nurturing. I don't think my mom is either. Unless cooking and feeding people lots of food count. Both my mom and I like to stuff people full of our food. For my own kids I did like to comb their hair and dress them, but they're older now and don't need that. When I was little I never played house.

If you looove cute little babies and puppies and want to take care of them, that's probably basic instinct and not exactly nurture. If you like taking care of everyone, including sick adults, teens who broke their arm, drug addicts, old folks with dementia, homeless people, then you're truly a nurturing kind of person.

*I'm very attracted to nurturing kind of people. They easily touch my heart. Must be "opposites attract" thing. Though they mustn't cry. Crying turn me off so much I just want to leave.

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poopylungstuffing
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30 Oct 2012, 2:54 am

i have always been good with small children, though i might not be great with people my own age. Sometimes i might be overly nurturing though on a significant other, as i am prone to fixate. i tend to become a kid when i am watching kids, so it does not really feel like nurturing

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melmaclorelai
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30 Oct 2012, 8:29 am

I am most likely on the autistic spectrum and I would not describe myself as particularly nurturing towards the human population.

If somebody is complaining about something, my thoughts will most likely be on the lines of "Get over yourself". Especially if the person tells me that I "should" feel sorry for them.

If it's somebody I consider a friend (about two people), I am a little bit more nurturing, in the sense that I will try to help them and tell them I'm sorry about what they're dealing with (and mean it, as well). But I'm not going to be anybody's sounding board for problems that they refuse to fix.

I will happily nurture animals because I know that they appreciate it.

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Skilpadde
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30 Oct 2012, 3:03 pm

melmaclorelai wrote:

I would not describe myself as particularly nurturing towards the human population.

If somebody is complaining about something, my thoughts will most likely be on the lines of "Get over yourself". Especially if the person tells me that I "should" feel sorry for them.

If it's somebody I consider a friend (about two people), I am a little bit more nurturing, in the sense that I will try to help them and tell them I'm sorry about what they're dealing with (and mean it, as well). But I'm not going to be anybody's sounding board for problems that they refuse to fix.

I will happily nurture animals because I know that they appreciate it.

That's exactly how I am too.

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mechanicalgirl39
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31 Oct 2012, 12:15 pm

Cats and dogs, sure. Babies? VOMIT.

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blue1skies
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08 Nov 2012, 11:06 pm

I have Asperger's syndrome, and by no means am I a nurturer! I detest small children, seeing people cry makes me want to leave the room, not help them, and if someone complains to me, more often that not I will tell them to get over it.
I'm just a very, very honest person. Some people say I don't have a filter. It's probably true. I dislike sugar-coatings, even on actual candy.

littlelily613
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25 Nov 2012, 12:19 am

I'm not a nurturer.

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