why is it always about the women?

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because she built your baby. That is usually why a man builds a woman a house. To provide for his children.


Merle

Her children ... there's no guaranty that any one of them is his.

Yeah I hear that excuse a lot......

Just get a damn DNA test if you want proof that your kid isn't biologically related to you.

yup, and if he can't trust her that they are his, then it's his issue, isn't it?

Merle

Not entirely ... trust is earned. So is mistrust. If you have suspicions about someone's integrity, then something the other person did must have triggered those suspicions.

The exception, of course, is paranoid-schizophrenia.

Who's to say they don't?

Actually you're probably right because women would complain if there was a men-only shelter.

I just think there's better things to do than complain about people helping the homeless. Women or no. There are plenty of genderless homeless shelters already in existence so I don't see how this has anything to do with women getting things "first"

Oh dear lord. How the hell did this become about cheating? Are we having an all-out gender war here?

Cheating? I'm talking about trust v. suspicion, as well as the unequal treament of the genders when it comes to social services.


Not yet ... we haven't had the official, "Cool down, people, or I'll have to close this thread" warning from one of the mods.

Last edited by Fnord on 24 Feb 2009, 11:27 am, edited 1 time in total.

Cheating is kinda how you get kids that aren't yours....

I wouldn't mind a Men's Shelter in fact I think that would be great. Only thing is my brother who's been in one said he hated most of the men there. I guess that makes him sexist?........

As for me, I was in a Women's Shelter and then a homeless one which was genderless. I have to be honest, I really did not feel comfortable or safe sleeping in a room with a bunch of guys. There were more guys in that shelter than there were women.

One good thing I learned from that experience is not all homeless people fit the profiles of druggies and bumbs. Most of them I got to know had mental disorders and some got laid off from their jobs. It really taught me a lot about stereotypes and how misinformed we are in the U.S. about homeless people. It's actually pretty sad I think.

^ Sorry for the generalization. What I meant was that there is a liklihood that a certain faction of women would complain as they often do at any sort of male-only place/activity.

^Oh no, I wasn't thinking about the generalization.

Yeah you're right about that. Women can be just as bad as men.

I just wanted to share my story. I got tons of them regarding shelters lol.

I just wish people in general weren't so judgemental about homelessness. It could happen to anyone.

sister has worked with people who live in similar hostels/homes.
One of the reasons some homes are just for women is because of the women who have been beaten up/treated badly by men and cant be around them [eg,PTSD and other MH stuff],there are actually places just for men who can't/dont want to be with women for various reasons as well.

A shelter is not a home. People who live in shelters are still homeless, as are those who sofa-surf. But a shelter may be quite a bit safer than the street.

Both sexes are vulnerable to violence on the street (let's go beat up a bum!), but women are more likely to be raped, and that gives some people the heebie-jeebies, so they want to do something about it.

In Vancouver, they're trying to open enough shelter spaces to get everyone off the street who wants off the street. One of the issues was dogs and shopping carts. Most shelters didn't allow them, and people were staying on the street so they wouldn't lose their dogs/possessions, so recently they opened some shelters that allow them, which helps.

Some shelters do need to be women only, for safety issues, as has been stated by others already, but really, we just need more shelters, and more permenent affordable housing as the next step. And with affordable housing, if it's actual apartments and not just hotel rooms with shared bathrooms/kitchens, it doesn't matter what sex you are, since people have privacy. So they just need to build them, and subsidize them in some way for those who can't afford market rates (though I don't agree with social housing - I prefer portable subsidies for use in market housing).

Personally, I'd feel safer in a women-only shelter, but I can tell you that I wouldn't necessarily feel safe. The women-only rooming house I lived in was pretty scary in some ways - I wasn't tough enough for some of those girls.

well, if I questioned someone's integrity why would I be sleeping with them?

Merle