Ever become terrified you're not the "real deal"?

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Aurore
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03 Sep 2008, 10:01 pm

Before I got my official dx I worried about this. I'm high functioning and my symptoms often aren't very severe. I heard so much talk about people 'faking' autism all the time that it became one of my horrible anxieties that maybe I was just some sort of crazy liar. Anyone else ever experience this fear?


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ShadesOfMe
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03 Sep 2008, 10:04 pm

Nope I never did. But I do have a fear that one day It'll turn out i'm not really an aspie, and I'd be so freaked out. Itt's completely irrational since I am very aspie. But still.



lionesss
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03 Sep 2008, 10:05 pm

There is a difference between identifying with what you read about autism symptoms and knowing deep down even before getting a dx "wow that is SO me" and blatantly lying about being under the spectrum all for attention. No need to worry and nothing to feel guilty about. You had a legitimate concern and you got it confirmed. And no I didn't have the fear because I knew something with me was very different and now I have a confirmation even though my symptoms are mild as well.


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Last edited by lionesss on 03 Sep 2008, 10:06 pm, edited 1 time in total.

kip
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03 Sep 2008, 10:05 pm

I had the same fear. What really made it go away was when both BF and boss picked me out as having some sort of ASD and I never told them about my suspicions. BF had loads of friends with ASDs as he was in SpEd classes, and boss has a bro with Autism.


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2ukenkerl
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03 Sep 2008, 10:12 pm

lionesss wrote:
There is a difference between identifying with what you read about autism symptoms and knowing deep down even before getting a dx "wow that is SO me" and blatantly lying about being under the spectrum all for attention. No need to worry and nothing to feel guilty about. You had a legitimate concern and you got it confirmed. And no I didn't have the fear because I knew something with me was very different and now I have a confirmation even though my symptoms are mild as well.


QFT!

Of course, I get what everyone means. I've felt the same way myself. But MAN does it fit. So I am certainly no liar with regard to this.



Aurore
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03 Sep 2008, 10:12 pm

lionesss wrote:
There is a difference between identifying with what you read about autism symptoms and knowing deep down even before getting a dx "wow that is SO me" and blatantly lying about being under the spectrum all for attention. No need to worry and nothing to feel guilty about. You had a legitimate concern and you got it confirmed. And no I didn't have the fear because I knew something with me was very different and now I have a confirmation even though my symptoms are mild as well.


Thanks lionesss : )

I knew in my heart I was profoundly different. But I was so scared the difference wasn't going to be AS, that I was really maybe just some defective neurotypical that didn't even deserve any diagnosis.

kip wrote:
I had the same fear. What really made it go away was when both BF and boss picked me out as having some sort of ASD and I never told them about my suspicions. BF had loads of friends with ASDs as he was in SpEd classes, and boss has a bro with Autism.


I got dx'd after going in for sensory issues and migraines. I didn't mention the family history of AS, or my suspicions, so it must've been pretty blatant at the time for him to just come out with the AS diagnosis. That helped me feel better; I'm not scared anymore. But in the past if was a deep concern of mine.


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CelticRose
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03 Sep 2008, 10:14 pm

I worry that if I do try to get a diagnosis, I won't get evaluated properly and be told I'm not an Aspie. I have no doubt that I am an Aspie, I just worry about the relative newness of AS as a diagnosis, the lack of research in adults and females, and the competency of doctors.


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03 Sep 2008, 10:18 pm

There are a lot of people with ASD-like personality traits. Some identify with ASD, some don't... I don't think that AS is something people either have or they don't, like the way a lightswitch is either on or off... where you fall on the spectrum is not a matter of exact scientific measurements, it really just boils down to a specialist's opinion.



poopylungstuffing
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03 Sep 2008, 10:26 pm

Yeah..despite my history, I worry that it is all in my head...and I am just kidding myself and internalising things too much....or that I am just totally off base...it crosses my mind alot.

I shore would like to kick the WP addiction...become organized and higher functioning...learn to drive...um...get my art and music stuffs together...not freak out over little changes....etc..etc.....What if I am only just a crazy hypochondriac like my partner has said?

I won't know till I get some sort of diagnosis...



ooOoOoOAnaOoOoOoo
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03 Sep 2008, 10:28 pm

How is it possible to "fake autism" and why do people want to?



Aurore
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03 Sep 2008, 10:44 pm

ooOoOoOAnaOoOoOoo wrote:
How is it possible to "fake autism" and why do people want to?


The idea is that some people claim they are autistic to not have to take responsibility for certain things. They think it's an excuse to be a jerk or a dolt and so pretend to have it so they can act that way. I suppose they play up their social awkwardness, throw in some stims, avoid eye contact obsessively, try to act as stereotypical as possible.
I've only met one person who claimed to be autistic without actually being it, but I think he was just misguided.


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03 Sep 2008, 10:49 pm

I worry that if I do try to seek a dx that I'll be brushed off as some hypochondriac or say I just have "anxiety" issues.
Sometimes I wonder just how aspie I am compared to others. Only officially dx'd aspie I've met is JKid. I could tell right away with him and strangely enough he reminds me of my brother. My brother did get the PDD-NOS dx when was younger. My mom thinks I'm probably in that same category if not AS, however since I missed the boat on that as a kid and I've since learned to cope and adapt and I probably won't be able to get accurately dx'd now.
But deep down, I know I'm on the spectrum somewhere. My brain just works differently than the way normal people do.


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03 Sep 2008, 10:51 pm

No. Once I discovered autism and made the connections with all the signs and symptoms which I've always had, there was never any doubt after that. I also can't imagine why anyone would want to fake something like that. I always wanted to do really well at everything I tried so can't imagine anyone wanting to do poorly which is what they'd have to do I guess to try and fake autism. I'm shy and can't imagine why anyone would want attention either. I would think people who are really on the spectrum would not be inclined to those sorts of things.



03 Sep 2008, 10:51 pm

Aurore wrote:
Before I got my official dx I worried about this. I'm high functioning and my symptoms often aren't very severe. I heard so much talk about people 'faking' autism all the time that it became one of my horrible anxieties that maybe I was just some sort of crazy liar. Anyone else ever experience this fear?



Yes. It bothers me me when I hear people say autism is being over diagnosed, people think they have it, AS has become a trendy label.

It just makes me cringe thinking what if I am one of those people who were misdiagnosed, then what do I have? Maybe I am just a dumb ass or maybe I am crazy. Maybe I have a related condition but what is it?



bicentennialman
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03 Sep 2008, 10:52 pm

Yeah; I identify with this a lot. I think it's been part of my personality for a long time to worry that my mistakes, uncertainties, and awkwardness is really my "fault," that it's something I'm doing wrong and not a weakness that is part of who I am.

Even now that I've been diagnosed, I still fall into that kind of thinking every once in a while. I think that's one reason why it can be hurtful when people make comments like Michael Savage did about autism being faked. I have enough negativity from myself to fight; I don't need it from the outside too!



mattcel
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03 Sep 2008, 10:55 pm

yeah I have been a little worried, but going back to the you just know it, months before my parents told me I was unofficially diagnosed, I had seen the abc news story on it, and I was like, gee that does sound like me, and my dad even said something,
of course, Im still not offically diagnosed, but I am waiting for it and hoping that it will come soon, because I do want a comfirmation, it would greatly relive me