Phrases - Meaning vs. Use

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I have a tendency to use phrases with their (more or less) literal meaning, not remembering/realizing until later that they're typically not used that way. In most cases, because of the way the general population uses them, they actually sound worse. For instance:

-No disrespect
How I mean it: Despite disagreeing with your opinion, I still respect you and your thoughts. Here's why I disagree.
How most people apparently use it: This phrase makes everything I say acceptable, no matter how much I personally attack you.

-No offense
How I mean it: I want to make an observation but am worried that it could offend someone. I am honestly not attempting to offend you and am saying it for some other (legitimate) purpose.
How most people apparently use it: The same as no disrespect.

-If it's not too much trouble
How I mean it: Literally. If it's not going to inconvenience you.
How most people apparently use it (I'm actually not positive on this one, but I'm fairly sure): You should do this for me regardless.

So what phrases do you use with their more or less literal meaning that ultimately take on a different meaning because of general use?

I can relate and then I find out how it means something else to another person like with "no offense" for example. To me it means you aren't trying to offend or be offensive and you don't want them to take it the wrong way. So pretty much the same thing you mean by it.

Or how about "not to be rude?" To me that means they aren't trying to be rude and you don't want it to be taken the wrong way and think they were being rude when all they did was asked a curious question or said a concern.

Yeah all those are BS - I think they're actually sort of sarcastic.

i say "to hell with it" and get constantly "corrected" by folk who say "don't you mean "THE hell with it?" to which i respond, "the way you say it makes no grammatical sense to me." "the hell with it" WHAT? "the hell with it walks around the corner and hides." "the hell with it pays no taxes." "the hell with it is a robberbaron." "the hell with it is blue with pinstripes." you get the picture. so when i say "TO hell with it" i mean for "it" to go to hell in a honeybucket, express.