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I told my mother she shared some of my AS traits...

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Janissy
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04 Jan 2011, 3:48 pm

Craig28 wrote:
You never tell a Neurotypical that they have Autistic traits, it threatens their ego and makes them go into stupid mode.


Uh oh. Logic trap. If the OP is right and she does have autistic traits, then she isn't neurotypical. If she is neurotypical, then the OP is wrong and she was right to reject his diagnosis (however hurtfully worded).



ADHDorASDorBoth
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04 Jan 2011, 3:54 pm

My mother is one of those types who is so sure of herself. I get the feeling that even if I was earning a million a year she would still pfffffft me when I explain things to her..........

You cannot educate carcasses.



wavefreak58
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04 Jan 2011, 3:57 pm

ADHDorASDorBoth wrote:
You cannot educate carcasses.


But you CAN beat a dead horse ... :roll: 8O :wink:


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whatamess
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05 Jan 2011, 12:27 am

Yep! I have been saying for the past 4 yrs my son is just like my mother's brother. With that, I also realized he was just like me. My mother thinks there is nothing "wrong" with my son...I have made every attempt to get her to understand that I don't see it was WRONG, but just DIFFERENT...Last year she finally said "so you think I have those things too?" my reply..."YES!" No other response from her.



pensieve
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05 Jan 2011, 1:40 am

I told my mum she might have ADHD.

She told me there's was nothing wrong with her.

So there's something wrong with me?

But seriously she needs to manage her symptoms. She's unorganised and forgetful and it's really affecting her life. She sent $100 to someone and it reached the wrong house. My Christmas present to my brother was with it too. Oh and she failed to take adequate care of her laptop.


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hesting
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06 Jan 2011, 3:08 pm

The more I read about it the more I'm convinced that my mom "suffers" from ADHD too.
I do not know how she manages to seem well organized in public. Her room at my parents' house is just a mess.
And she is quite picking on me thinking my issues are worse. :roll:

Today they left the house for some skiing vacation.
Accidentally I called them when they had stopped at a gas station. They were just getting right to start again and my mom had left her bag at the toilet. I do not know how but she had kept her wallet in her hand. And so she said "well, nothing really valuable has been in the bag". *headdesk*
The personnel of the station had taken the bag away in the meantime though.



KondimentsGuy
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06 Jan 2011, 3:44 pm

tasbro wrote:
She told me, "I refuse to believe I am diseased." This truly hurt my feelings. Something about my own mother describing the way I am as "diseased" or a "disorder" just struck me the wrong way. Has anybody else had a similar experience with a family member who knows you have AS?


Speaking of people thinking of Autism as a disease, I've seen people called Asperger's 'Asperger's Disease' on some sites. Their ignorance makes me laugh - the way I think of it is that, if neurotypicals aren't as good at certain things as ASD individuals are, then how come THEY aren't diseased? As everyone says, it's really just a matter of people with Autism having more difficulty in adapting to the world because of their different types of brains, rather than them having a 'disease'.

Also, when I was talking to an Autism expert he said that some person had gone to a GP to get diagnosed with Autism, and the GP had said 'When did you catch autism and when do you think you'll recover from it?' to which I jokingly said 'Yeah and it's like they prescribe you with a course of antibiotics for 3 weeks to get rid of it.' :)



Rose_in_Winter
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06 Jan 2011, 4:26 pm

My husband is absolutely not allowed to use the word "disease" in reference to AS. He can call it a syndrome or a disorder, though I wish he'd say "difference," since that's how I see it.

I think everyone has some Aspie traits -- after all, there are a LOT of Aspie traits! My husband, for example, has temper-tantrums that remind me of the meltdowns I had as a child. Screaming incoherently, throwing things...he has a bad temper and gets frustrated easily. (My parents worked with me to develop better strategies than screaming and throwing objects.) Doesn't make him an Aspie! However, I know if I said he had some Aspie traits he'd say something like, "Oh, you think everyone has Asperger's!" because whenever I suggest he see someone for his depression, he snarls, "Oh, you think everyone needs therapy!" I think that NTs see a lot of the negatives of AS, and since they aren't in our world with us, miss out on the positives. The idea that all those perceived negatives could affect them must be scary, if they think of us as diseased and disabled.



tasbro
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06 Jan 2011, 4:49 pm

The thing that surprised me about her statement was that she was the first person to mention AS to me. After reading a book about AS she was convinced that I had it. I read up on the subject and agreed that I most likely had Asperger's, but some of the traits were ones she shared as well. She even said that she may have it at first, but quickly dismissed the idea. My theory is that she didn't research it very much, saw one or two traits she didn't have, and decided that it was impossible for her to have AS because of it. My mother is also very hard headed and refuses to change her opinion no matter what information you present to her.