how to talk loud but not sound angry

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I don't know how to do it. The people I work with who talk loud sound angry. Intelectually I can tell when they are-by situation and things like that but not by how they sound.

And I'm always being told to talk louder. How do I do it without screaming at people?

This might help:

http://www.wikihow.com/Project-Your-Nor ... king-Voice

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rtkowhNPm1s[/youtube]

My problem once I learned to project my voice in high school drama was not realizing that I was projecting my voice at all times. Prior to that I barely spoke above a whisper. Once a former roommate got on my case for projecting all the time, I went back to barely above a whisper for a long time.

Holy crap! Is this ever a problem for me!

(Apologies to Uhura, as this is a severe issue in my life. I don't mean to hijack your thread. I'm on the opposite end of this problem.)

My voice is of a tone and frequency that is hard to hear in many situations. Over the phone is the worst, but also in environments with any noise at all, such as when other conversations going on. Out in open spaces or large buildings, like stores, my family usually can't ever hear me trying to get their attention.

I don't mumble or whisper either. People have no problem hearing and understanding me once their focus is on me. GETTING their attention is the problem. When I can't seem to, it seems the only option I have is to speak loudly enough that I feel I am shouting.

But, it's not just my feeling. Even when people are focused on me, if I happen to be enthusiastic, a little bit irritated or excited about something, I'm told I am yelling. My family has intimated that I always sound angry when I do that. The problem is, I'm not usually angry at all!

It's a real problem at home, because the entire family, both my wife and my kids, tell me that I sound angry even when I'm not.

It runs in my family too. Others have noted my parents and grandparents spoke loudly, and often sounded angry. The quizzical part of all this is that I don't remember ever having a problem telling the difference. I could always tell when my parents or grandparents were truly angry. I have come to learn my family has always been kind of loud.

One contributing factor may be that almost every nuclear family in our extended family has been quite large. I was an only child, but both my parents had several sibling while growing up. Being HEARD was a challenge in their families, as well as every other immediate family in our extended family.

So I've had kind of a double whammy going on in my upbringing. On the one hand, it's a learned behavior, but on the other it's a survival factor because of the qualities of my voice.



Verdandi, I wish like crazy those techniques actually worked for me. I do a lot of song recording, and have to do those kinds of exercises to get my vocals tracks to be crisp and clear yet I still have problems even with singing. Speech is even worse.

I've practically given up finding a solution for this problem.

Hmm. The video says "... the more confident you are, the more your voice will naturally project."

Houston, we have a problem...

Oh, the video. I didn't find that to be true at all. Projection was a mechanical matter based on how you vocalized. My confidence was terrible and I projected everywhere.

MrXxx, well as I said it didn't help me judge how I was speaking, it just recalibrated me from too quiet to too loud. I just knew it got me there so I thought I'd throw it out there - not as a joke, but as a possible solution.

You can go someplace with a lot of noise (if you don't have sensory issues) with a friend and practice talking to the friend in the noisy place. You will need to talk loudly to be heard by your friend. When you need to talk loudly, pretend like you are talking to that friend again in the club or where you were that was noisy.

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