does aspergers mean we get the short end of the stick?

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Joshandspot
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06 Jul 2009, 6:37 pm

someone made that comment about it recently and i was wondering what peoples take on it was. do you guys feel that living in this world with aspergers means that expression rings true?



Stupidcat
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06 Jul 2009, 6:40 pm

What do they mean by "the short end of the stick"? Not literally speaking. I'm confused about what exactly are we not getting that someone else is because of AS?



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06 Jul 2009, 6:46 pm

It's a mixture of metaphors, there's the short straw, when people draw straws and the person who gets the short straw is chosen to do something, usually unpleasant. Then there's the sharp end of the stick, like sticks have a pointy end and a blunt end so you get the dangerous end of the stick.



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06 Jul 2009, 6:51 pm

what stick?


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sinsboldly
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06 Jul 2009, 6:52 pm

sinsboldly wrote:
what stick?


we get the fuzzy side of the lollypop.


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Joshandspot
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06 Jul 2009, 7:12 pm

now that i think about it that was a horrible question...i've been asking alot of whys as to autism and trying to convince myself there are positives in it but when someone throws a short end of the stick comment (therefore saying our lives are less than the majority of the population) it gets me angry and i feel the need to run onto wrongplanet and somehow have people convince me this isnt true...even tho if i truly was confident in myself and that autism has its positive aspects, i wouldn't need other people to convince me of it. But than again i'm sure there are people who seemingly have everything who feel they need convincing of their lives being of worth...



Stupidcat
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06 Jul 2009, 7:26 pm

Joshandspot wrote:
now that i think about it that was a horrible question...i've been asking alot of whys as to autism and trying to convince myself there are positives in it but when someone throws a short end of the stick comment (therefore saying our lives are less than the majority of the population) it gets me angry and i feel the need to run onto wrongplanet and somehow have people convince me this isnt true...even tho if i truly was confident in myself and that autism has its positive aspects, i wouldn't need other people to convince me of it. But than again i'm sure there are people who seemingly have everything who feel they need convincing of their lives being of worth...


Everyone needs to be reminded now and again that the positives are out there. If all you hear is negative comments even the most secure person would doubt themselves. I think that no matter how confident you are this is going to happen from time to time. I guess what you do with those negative feelings is what really matters. Think about it this way if you like: the person made that comment because they need to feel that they are better off than someone else. How good can your life be if you have to compare yourself to others to feel good?



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06 Jul 2009, 7:27 pm

Joshandspot wrote:
now that i think about it that was a horrible question...i've been asking alot of whys as to autism and trying to convince myself there are positives in it but when someone throws a short end of the stick comment (therefore saying our lives are less than the majority of the population) it gets me angry and i feel the need to run onto wrongplanet and somehow have people convince me this isnt true...even tho if i truly was confident in myself and that autism has its positive aspects, i wouldn't need other people to convince me of it. But than again i'm sure there are people who seemingly have everything who feel they need convincing of their lives being of worth...


geeze, some people have war in their countries. Some kids don't get enough to eat and their short and suffering lives are crippled by rickets and ravaged by disease. Some mothers have no milk to feed their babies and live in refugee camps that get raided by people bent on rape, pillage and genocide.

I, however, am Autistic in a first world country. I wouldn't want to trade places, would you?


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Batz
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06 Jul 2009, 7:31 pm

Considering Autism as the short end of the stick irks me too. How can it be a short end? That's like saying the white man's better than the black man in everyway, and we know that's not true. Sure, we have challenges, but so does everyone. We're not infallible, and everyone has challenges, so to whom does one say he or she has been handed the short end of the stick? I don't, and I'm sure a lot of people here don't either.

Somehow, to me this implies to evolution, which I abhor. We're equal, created by God (or whatever you call him if you're not Christian), so we need to treat everyone like it and stop demeaning ourselves. That's all I have to say Joshandspot.



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06 Jul 2009, 7:43 pm

Batz wrote:
~snip~
We're equal, created by God (or whatever you call him if you're not Christian)/snip~ .


are you suggesting that if we are not Christian we still believe in an divine entity that has a gender? I am sure you wanted to be inclusive of more than your belief system and I do agree with you that is a good thing. But it still excludes those of us that don't have the 'Big Three' world religions.

just sayin'

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Last edited by sinsboldly on 06 Jul 2009, 8:00 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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06 Jul 2009, 7:58 pm

I don't think so, at all. I think that aspies and NTs have gifts that compliment each other.


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06 Jul 2009, 8:05 pm

sinsboldly wrote:
Joshandspot wrote:
now that i think about it that was a horrible question...i've been asking alot of whys as to autism and trying to convince myself there are positives in it but when someone throws a short end of the stick comment (therefore saying our lives are less than the majority of the population) it gets me angry and i feel the need to run onto wrongplanet and somehow have people convince me this isnt true...even tho if i truly was confident in myself and that autism has its positive aspects, i wouldn't need other people to convince me of it. But than again i'm sure there are people who seemingly have everything who feel they need convincing of their lives being of worth...


geeze, some people have war in their countries. Some kids don't get enough to eat and their short and suffering lives are crippled by rickets and ravaged by disease. Some mothers have no milk to feed their babies and live in refugee camps that get raided by people bent on rape, pillage and genocide.

I, however, am Autistic in a first world country. I wouldn't want to trade places, would you?


I agree that there are other people in the world who have it worse, but that doesn't mean that a person doesn't struggle in different ways. Of course most people would rather not trade places with them - war, famine, homelessness...it doesn't appeal to anyone. Just because someone says that they feel like they got the 'short end of the stick' with autism or aspergers it doesn't mean they don't appreciate that there are other people out there who are living in much harder conditions.

Anyway, rant aside...
I don't think I got the short end. Yes, I may have been born with AS but all of my problems up until this day I've caused on my own, and it had nothing to do with AS. I don't have any friends but that's probably my fault for not going out and meeting anyone.


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Bonny
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06 Jul 2009, 8:51 pm

re: "short end of the stick" ,

when referenced about 'one's lot in life I understand it as a simple picture of someone's opinion as they have to resort to a picture because they can't or don't want to, or are in denial of ... the huge number of reasons why anyone and so many people do get the seots: , greed, ignorance, masochism, mysogony, illiteracy, fundamentalism, out-dated idieologies( excuse my bias), gender, and all the other reasons why some give oxygen to language that endorses the value of dominance and their need to sustain it by comparison!

Thank god that ASD is out in the open to confound the metaphorians even more about their precious opinions on reality/ies.



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06 Jul 2009, 11:49 pm

I don't think we do. I have a bright future if I choose to make the best of it. I'm having a great summer too, hanging out and having plenty of time to play my guitar. It all depends on the individual and their attitude.



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07 Jul 2009, 12:44 am

I once used that expression to describe it but I said "the short end of the stick socially" - what with the difficulties with non-verbal cues and that... just socially. It is when competing socially against others the characteristics make it much harder to win in said competition and one could otherwise be "better" in other ways, more attractive physically, more intelligent, more caring a person, that these AS characteristics turn what should be a good chance at success into failure, in the social sphere.



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07 Jul 2009, 7:01 am

Honestly, I feel we do.

Society is geared for NTs. We are at a disadvantage in that area, and unless you are very fortunate, it does cost you in many ways that do matter.

I should be making double what I am now with my skills, but my inability to land and hold a job that pays that well is largely because of how AS affects me.