Anyone else hate people in their space?

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I completely relate to that. I had a leaky roof and by the time the landlord found out how bad it was and did anything about it a large part of the plaster had swelled and crumbled and was falling off the wall. There was a couple of times he had the roof fixed and it always started leaking again but he never realized how bad it was until my downstairs neighbors started having it leak inside the wall and they had a leak downstairs too.

Between the plastering and painting I was unable to use my own bedroom for 9 days. If there wasn't another bedroom to use I don't know what I would have done or where I would have even slept.

It actually leaked again since then and we told him but nothing has been done about it yet.



I don't like having people in my place, especially when I'm not here. There is no way I'd ever use a cleaning lady or let anyone who thought they were being "helpful" by helping with cleaning mess with my stuff.

I completely understand. No one is allowed to enter my chambers unless I grant them permission (which very rarely happens). No one is allowed to see my personal collection or touch my items without my permission. So I am very territorial like a grizzly bear.

It is also applies to personal space: while I will shake hands with strangers freely, hugs or any other touching is not allowed, even with family members. I was told I hate being touched even as a baby, so it is something I will resolve on my own, especially since I want be married later in life. Though the fight/flight senses I get while being touched will always remain.

YES!! ! I yell at my mom but this all the time. She comes in my room and starts moving things and it drives me nuts. Other times she'll come hang by my doorway and talk to me. So I get angry and snap at her... and she tells me not to yell. My mom is the one person who doesn't understand the boundaries and space I need being in my room.

What makes me angrier is when she is always saying, "DOn't yell at me!!" Like she doesn't seem to understand my autism as much as she thinks she does. My dad knows about these boundaries but telling my mom is like telling a wall to stop standing there. -w-

I don't seem to have this problem anymore but in my teens I hated when my brothers were in my area which be the basement. That is where I always hung out and their area was the playroom but I hated when they be in my space. They move stuff around, make too much noise, be in my way of things I usually do, leave a mess down there. It give me anxiety and make me have meltdowns after a while.

But I don't mind people being in my apartment. I just do my own thing still and people rarely come over. Those who come over are either family or the landlord. Today it was the Dell guy that came over to fix my husband's laptop. But I would not want lot of people in my apartment.

I currently live with my mom (hoping to get out of here soon) and hate it she or anyone else goes into my room (including the cat that lives here). My mom used to do my laundry when I moved back home from college until I told her to stop and let me do it myself (I'm perfectly capable of doing my own laundry anyway to begin with). Part of it was how annoying it was that she would barge into my room all the time to do my laundry (she's OCD when it comes to cleaning) and other is well...I never asked her to do my own damn laundry in the first place. A couple months ago, my mom lost her full time job and wanted to clean everything including my closet. She was kind enough to let me haul the boxes she had stored in there to her bedroom and then haul them back when she was done with them and let me take care of vacuuming it because I didn't want her and the cat intruding in my room. That's all I have on this topic.

When I was living at home I didn't like people in my room especially other children, there was this girl who used to go through all my cupboards and drawers I tried to stop her but then she would go to my Mum and ask permission to go in there.

I also don't like people almost standing on top of me I move away when they do.

There is only 1 person who I tolerate to stand over me, but I prefer it when he moves to the side so he is eye level with me at school. OK, I guess I take that back, I have 2 professors that I tolerate doing that. Anyone else is not allowed to do it. I don't even really like it when my favorite professor does it, but I respect him enough to know that he's trying to help me so I hold in my anxiety until he leaves. He knows I'm different from the others in class and respects my differences for the most part.

I've been feeling like I am in meltdown mode for the past week with all the stress I'm under. I'm waiting for it to happen.

I still feel weird about people being in my room yesterday and I can't shake it. It's not making it easier that we have to post our lab notebooks on our google group for our class and everyone in class can look at them and make comments, including our professor, and he finally got around to making comments on mine and now everyone can see them. I understand science is collaborative and peer reviewed and I understand he's trying to prep us for the real world, but it still drives my anxiety because I feel like people already judge me because I'm different, now they're judging me even more because they can see my mistakes.

YES. I think it's pretty universal among us. I don't want ANYONE; friend or foe, in my personal areas of the house. I don't want visiting to use my bathroom... That's why we have a guest bathroom, (and my wife her own too.) I don't want to share any workout equipment, and as a bodybuilder, I had to build my own gym so as to have it all mine. I also won't use valet parking, and I maintain and repair my own vehicles because I don't want anyone else driving or fooling around with them. Even when I need new tires, I take all the wheels off the car, and take them to a tire shop for new tires, then I bring them home, put them back on the car, and set the lug torque perfectly per the book specs (they don't bother to do that at tire shops). I'm so weird about avoiding valet parking, that I'll park blocks & blocks away from wherever I'm going, in order to do it myself.

Charles

Yes, same here. It makes me very uncomfortable.

People keep telling me I have to get over it. They just don't understand what it's like.

I'm like the OP too. My space is my space.

I will explain a related event that happened this evening. My oldest son's band banquet was this evening---for the band students and their families. So...there are all these tables with about 8 chairs at each one. My wife, who knows how I am about these social events, said we will try to get a table to ourselves. As soon as we walk in, this band mother begins following us to our table. Well...ok...she knows my wife and they will talk and I can just sit there. Then this band father begins making his rounds to each table to chit chat As he got near out table, I decided to avoid the awkwardness---I got up and headed for the restroom. By the time I returned, he was at the far end of the room---then he joined our table for his dining . The thing that upsets me is this. Just because it was only my wife and this other mother, and me alone at the table doesn't mean I need someone to talk to---I want left alone. There were plenty of empty places to sit---why me...why me...why me??????????????????? The band students, including my son, were sitting at their own tables. I need private space when I need to go to public things like this. Well...I have learned that my video camera serves a neat purpose in stuff like this. If I don't want to talk, I just take the camera out and do some filming.

When I was growing up I used to use tents as a personal space place. That was so nice on warm summer days---crawl into the shady tent and let the gentle breeze flow through the tent as I laid there listening to the sounds around me and smelled the nylon fabric mix with the freshly cut grass. And talk about cozy. As an adult I have on occasion set a tent up in the family room to crawl into.

I don't like people in my space either. No one goes in my room without knocking and asking permission. Usually I go out to them- even if it is family. I don't like people in the house at all unless they also live there.

I totally agree with this, I can't stand people being in my space, I don't even tell people where I live. In some extreme cases I have actually moved house in the past to avoid such occurrences, I know it sounds unbelievable but it really distresses me to think that someone might come round and expect to sit in my house. but I don't mind going to theirs, in fact I'll even go to the lengths of helping myself to a cup of tea and a biscuit in someone else's house.

I would even prefer to have my own room/bed from a significant other. Ex-girlfriends have always been offended by me saying that, but it's really nothing personal against any person, I just need my own space, badly.

I hate when relatives move stuff around in my room, as it takes longer for to settle down once I get home (Change of clothes) and I can't find stuff.