impulsive spending

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I'm the opposite. I tend to not spend it at all because I am afraid of surprises like all of a sudden I would have to spend money. Like this month my husband had to buy his mother's medication (he was the only one who could help since he was the only one who had the money) or she would die without it. Just shows me why I should be obsessed with saving.

I've noticed that with aspies, we are either impulsive with spending or too obsessed with saving we tend to be cheap or have anxiety when we run low in our bank account. I have an aspie friend who gets upset over unexpected bills, especially when a bill is higher than it usually is.

Reviving this thread because I have horrible spending problems, even worse than the OP's (whom I know IRL). Whenever I got a paycheck in the past, I would often just go and immediately buy expensive clothes and food. I think my spending habits are more under control now, but the thing is, I have extreme anxiety about particular things and that causes various types of impulsivity. Sometimes it's spending, sometimes overeating, sometimes extreme overindulgence in my special interest, sometimes stupid makeovers like cutting my hair, etc. I know exactly why this is happening because we studied it in psych class. I also have some narcissistic traits, which I think only makes the problem worse. Whenever I have a breakdown, I go to extremes and then forget about priorities or anything else that matters. I am going to see a therapist about this because I think all of these issues stem from anxiety, past traumas, and emotional control difficulties at the core, that I try very hard to block out and modulate but need someone to help me keep up the proper strategies for doing so.

I am not a borderliner because I have a pretty stable identity and relationships. My reasoning and opinions tend to be pretty stable if I'm well-informed, and my high self-esteem is less and less fleeting than in the past. I want to get rid of that low self-esteem that runs underneath it and sometimes surfaces.

I am like League girl, this is what I do when figureing out wheather to buy an unrequired purchase or not.

Figure out what you make per hour and divide the purchase price of an item by your wage, that way you can see how much work it takes to buy it and if its worth it in your mind. So if you make $10 (were MathGirl and I live its 10.25 min wage)an hour and an item is $100 it then takes 10 hours of work to buy it, thats alot of work!

Thats a very logical perspective I can understand really well that helped me although I have always been really thrifty/careful researched shopper since as long as I can remember.

I still struggle with this, but I used to be much, much worse about running out and buying things that weren't necessary in hindsight. Going out and getting it because I wanted it was a way of bandaiding over my emotions for a quick fix.

I find what works for me is asking myself if I really need that item or do I just want that item, and if I need that item, how urgently do I need it? If I can just put whatever I'm looking at down and walk away, even for a minute, I find I'm much less likely to buy it.

The cheaper solution would be to become OCD about frugalness.

Impulse spending is dangerous, no matter how financially secure you are. But sometimes it's OK, if you have BUDGETED a certain amount for "fun money", and it's not part of what you need for living expenses, and it's not part of what is to be saved up. I've done some outlandish impulse spending, but have tried to be responsible about it. What I mean is, that I get the impulse to buy something, and first will categorize it into "money to be gone forever" or "money tied up; will recover some or all when the item is sold or used/pays for itself". I spend very very little impulsively on things that are classified as "money gone forever". This would be things like travel, electronics, etc. For other things, like my special interests (old TV sets from the 1940s, vintage cars & motorcycles, and air raid sirens), I usually either make a few dollars or break even, when considering the enjoyment of having whatever it is, and then selling when ready. Sometimes I even make a good profit, such as when I buy a beat-up old incomplete wreck of a car, then spend a couple years having fun restoring it at leisure, then sell it. If I added my labor, it would be a money pit. But since the labor is my fun, I don't count it, and then I might have made 1000% cash profit .

Another time, I got the notion to buy two Federal Thunderbolt air raid sirens (total of about 2500 pounds) on eBay, and they were all the way the other side of the country. So I calculated that I could afford to spend (lose) the money, and we drove the 5000-mile round trip and hauled them home. 10 nights at hotels, and about 400 gallons of Diesel fuel, and 2 weeks away. But the fun was worth it!! !

Other things partially pay for themselves; including my landmark, all-time impulse buy.... a 53,000-lb Caterpillar 963 track loader/ bulldozer. I looked casually for a year or so, and found it on Craigslist for $24,000. It was being sold by a financially-distressed grading contractor who wanted it gone, and was ready to take a lowball offer. Basically I got it for 1/2 of fair market value. And I can sell it now that the economy is better, and the construction industry is getting stronger, for at least $35,000 and I have only put about $2000 into it in parts & repairs. And the best part, right now it's being operated on our property to save us $2000 a day for at least a week, when we would have had to rent one!

So those are examples of how impulse spending can be regulated and moderated... But it's also easy to rationalize yourself into buying stuff that won't REALLY ever let you see the money again. Be careful!

Charles