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Blue Jay
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22 Jan 2013, 3:57 pm

People see this as rude, but I'm trying to stop myself from leering into their soul. :roll: soo if you had to choose one extreme which one do you think would be more appropriate . Leering into some bodies eyes like this 8O or avoiding eye contact. I can't do both but I've always avoided because I didn't want to cross the persons boundaries. Idk...



M305
Tufted Titmouse
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22 Jan 2013, 4:38 pm

I usually look between the eyes, that way i don't have to look at their eyes - and forget to listen what they are talking about - and it's not considered rude. althuogh some people pick up on that. :(


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seaturtleisland
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22 Jan 2013, 5:20 pm

When I was younger I used to avoid eye contact for the opposite reason. I didn't want other people looking into my soul. I didn't want anybody to know who I was. I protected and concealed myself by avoicing eye-contact.

I also had no trouble lying which I've heard is unusual for someone with AS but I didn't want people to see right through me when I lied. I avoided eye contact for that reason but it never made me look suspicious because everyone knew I had AS. My diagnosis actually explained away my lack of eye contact when the reason for it was that I was lying.



Magnanimous
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22 Jan 2013, 5:25 pm

I wear dark sunglasses.
If anyone can actually tell whether or not I'm looking them in the eyes, they sure as hell don't make it known.



answeraspergers
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22 Jan 2013, 5:40 pm

i do this sometimes.

bad habit i need to get out of

it usually means - im in my own world but people do get offended by it



btbnnyr
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22 Jan 2013, 5:50 pm

I don't avoid eye contact on purpose. My brain seems to do it automatically. But I can make eye contact on purpose. It doesn't make me feel any special feelings, good or bad. I would enjoy making eye contact with people if people all had cat faces.



Last edited by btbnnyr on 22 Jan 2013, 5:51 pm, edited 1 time in total.

windtreeman
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22 Jan 2013, 5:51 pm

I really need to pick up some sunglasses. Seems like they're pretty helpful with the eye-contact issues but, like wearing clothes I'm not used too, I can't seem to make the adjustment and start wearing them. Anyway, I'd rather have someone make poor eye contact than stare into my eyes, so I project my own preference.


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Magnanimous
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22 Jan 2013, 5:55 pm

btbnnyr wrote:
I would enjoy making eye contact with people if people all had cat faces.

There is a possibility that they would just ruin cat faces for you by using them for human purposes.


windtreeman wrote:
I really need to pick up some sunglasses. Seems like they're pretty helpful with the eye-contact issues but, like wearing clothes I'm not used too, I can't seem to make the adjustment and start wearing them. Anyway, I'd rather have someone make poor eye contact than stare into my eyes, so I project my own preference.

Having a favourable predisposition towards the idea of glasses in advance greatly aids the transition.



finger
Blue Jay
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22 Jan 2013, 5:55 pm

btbnnyr wrote:
I would enjoy making eye contact with people if people all had cat faces.
omg! I know right?



eric76
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22 Jan 2013, 6:06 pm

btbnnyr wrote:
I would enjoy making eye contact with people if people all had cat faces.


I love that.

:D

Of course, many animals interpret looking straight at them as very threatening.



btbnnyr
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22 Jan 2013, 6:11 pm

I heard that a cat squinting is like smiling, and cats sometimes respond to hooomans squinting at them by squinting back.



TheAvatar
Tufted Titmouse
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22 Jan 2013, 6:43 pm

I get around it whenever I can by finding ways to look busy. I might look at a menu, press buttons on a keypad, dig around in my pockets or go through my wallet, whatever might seem appropriate for the situation.



Sylvastor
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22 Jan 2013, 6:47 pm

M305 wrote:
I usually look between the eyes, that way i don't have to look at their eyes - and forget to listen what they are talking about - and it's not considered rude. althuogh some people pick up on that. :(

Same here, my psychologist didn't even notice that at first! :)


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League_Girl
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23 Jan 2013, 1:24 am

I avoided it more often as a kid because it didn't come natural to me. I didn't choose to not look at people. I didn't know I was supposed to do it and it made me uncomfortable if I was forced to. I was 14 when I noticed I don't look at people when I talk to them and I am looking at the ground or at something else when I look their direction. It was a constant reminded to look at them when I talk to them. Now I do it automatically because it became a habit due to getting used to it. I will look at their faces or their clothes or their hand gestures or hair. When someone looks at me when I look at them, I automatically look away like they had caught me staring at them.


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steviewonderau
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23 Jan 2013, 6:58 am

Constantly avoiding eye contact is usually a clear indicator of Autism/Aspergers syndrome or a learning disability.