describe your worst meltdown

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Describe your worse meltdown you ever? How bad was it. What did you do? Why did you do it? What kind of situation did it cause it to happen? Do you feel shamed?

How bad was it?
It upset me and the people around me.

What did you do?
I cried, swore, shouted, hit myself, slammed doors, threatened to kill myself

Why did you do it?
Just got frustrated with the loneliness and isolation in my life, and took it out on myself.

What kind of situation did it cause it to happen?
Being reminded of how lonely I am by hearing about my peers being loved and having friends and being out doing things.

Do you feel shamed?
Yes, deeply ashamed. I don't know what the neighbours thought.

I haven't had one of those though since I went on Sertlaline, which was over a year ago. So I'm a lot happier and so is everyone else around me.

I don't know how bad it was but I remember it feeling horrible. I don't know which meltdown was worse because they usually happen at night. I hit myself repeatedly, rocked, sobbed, bit my arms, and I wanted to scream but I couldn't. It felt like my sensory processing system was ripping itself inside out. The situation? Noise and sensation. Trying to sleep, hearing things ticking, or crawling, people snoring, my own breathing, the feeling of my hair against my neck.
Do I feel shamed? No, I don't. I've had a few public meltdowns but they mostly just involve crying, and rarely happen. Even then, I don't really care...I don't possess normal self conscious feelings that others do, I suppose. There's just no connection other than to the people I know.

Most of my meltdowns have been of relatively equal intensity, but vary based on the stimuli. The ones I hate most are the ones that are triggered by something unexpectedly disappointing happening, or something occurring to prevent me from doing something I was looking forward to. That bitter, angry feeling can last for hours or days after the initial meltdown has subsided. The last time it happened was on Tuesday, December 29th, 2014. I was expecting to go in for therapy like I do every Tuesday, but had forgotten that due to Christmas break, my therapist had moved my usual 6 PM appointment to 2 PM. She called and asked where I was, and asked if we could reschedule for the following week. I said fine, but flipped out as soon as I hung up, banging my head against my bedframe, hitting, biting, pulling my hair, by the time it was over, I had bruises on both legs and a headache that would last until the next day. Even after she called back and said she could fit me in on Wednesday instead, I still had that frantic, agitated feeling, like I'd barely missed being run over by a train or something.

I was mad at my parents & slashed my arm 9x with a box-cutter & had to be taken to the emergency room sense it was after doctor's hours. I was depressed for a while before that & it turned into a psychotic depression. I started seeing a psychiatrist after for the next 5 years. I still feel bad about it but I did get the help I needed after. It was kind of a cry for help cuz my parents weren't listening to me when I said I needed to see a doc for mental help.

The worst ones are where I go totally ballistic and have to be restrained. They are the worst for me because I am sore afterwards from straining against being restrained and if I've hit stuff or myself before being restrained. I also feel woozy afterwards and have a headache.

i cant remember the reason why since it was a while ago but i would just sit on my own doing nothing not moving a muscle but in my mind if felt like the atomic bomb going off.

As a kid all my meltdowns were equally as bad.


Yelling,screaming,cursing ,destruction of property. None really stand out from another ,except one time the principal wanted to make a example out of me and sent me in a stretcher through the halls.

Somewhere between me trying to kill my sister for kicking me out of our room or me kicking a hole in my wall.

Actually when I tried to kill my sister I got arrested which got me diagnosed in the first place.


I don't remember a lot of my meltdowns

I screamed for an hour straight before. Since then, I have shortened a meltdown down to a minute. When something bugs me or pisses me off, I will scream for maybe one sentence and be fine again. It happens maybe once or twice a month now. However I have a different approach and people think I am more cold than before. Rather not react to stuff I don't need to react to.