Brown and Autistic: A frightening encounter with the police.

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I'm interrupting my "Orphan Black" binge to respond to this article/conversation, so... you're welcome!

I work in special education and have been unofficially diagnosed as autistic by colleagues who are very qualified to do so.

First, to Mike and the article:

Absolutely EXACTLY what I thought it would be from the headline! Clear, direct, as concise at it could be while still incorporating a humorous style and strong metaphorical flourishes! Thank you for not disappointing! I give it a 9.5 out of ten. I think you hit many things on the head that appear as nails to this hammer.

I also have a SOMEWHAT similar experience as a Jewish person on the spectrum. It took me a while to come to grips with the social ill of prejudice and bigotry as a Jew, but being a late-diagnosed "'Spergian", I could perhaps accept the diagnosis better than most because I'd dealt with antisemitism already and now knew suddenly why so many people had treated me differently when they had no idea I was Jewish.

My autistic traits make me a person of many words. I'm sorry to say, though, that I might as well have been that "white boy" sitting next to you in class and talking. I have poor impulse control over speech, mostly because I really do have a lot to say. I wouldn't have let you take the blame for it though, and probably would have been your best friend. The trait of hyperglossia (I know, that's not the right term!) has garnered improper diagnosis of bipolar disorder and coke addiction, neither of which are actually true. But as I will point out in a moment, the biggest overlap in my neurological condition has been my other minority status as a Jew.

Most Jews are perceived as white by other people until they see us enter or leave a temple, or we tell them we don't celebrate Christmas but are NOT Jehovah's Witnesses. (Interestingly, Witnesses are often called JWs in cyber shorthand, but I digress, as usual...) The other thing that "gives us away" as Jews, mostly to other Jews, is our speaking style and general loquatiousness. I guess the term for me is hyperloquatiousness. Yummy...word salad.

The perception that we American Ashkenazi Jews project is that of the "passing" Jew. We have lighter skin (due to our mixed European heritage) and are less likely to have recent ancestors with foreign accents than other Jews. But when people know of our faith or even our ancestral faith, there are "differences" in the way people talk to you. This happens both from the sense of "other-ness" and from a "walking on eggshells" effect where they fear they'll say something antisemitic like "Oh, I really got JEWED on that car deal!" without thinking. The world I get to see when white Christians DON'T know I'm a Jew reveals a lot about how much antisemitism still exists. It's sad. I don't hear the word "k*e" as often as I used to, but "Hebe" and "Jew" said in a disparaging tone are common.

Still, it PALES in comparison (oh that was a bad pun, sorry, I'm terrible) to what it's like to not be ABLE to hide your difference. In the case of being black AND being autistic, that's doubly difficult to hide. While I truly hope you are as comfortable in your skin as you are in your brain, as you HAVE nothing to hide, you may yet have had moments where you wish that at least it didn't matter.

I applaud your success and would be jealous of it, were I not so proud of you. You rock! (tee-hee)

You are in a great position to promote conversations about what it means to be treated differently due to an involuntary condition (not disease, but condition, like not liking raspberries or being right-handed). Being a POC and autistic are both involuntary conditions of which no one should have to feel ashamed.

Everyone's life experience is different, but many have things in common, due to common factors, conditions they have in common.

On The Thread:

Sonic, you risk getting labeled as a racist with your comments. It really looks like you're the guy who trolls forums about race, trying to find a "gotcha" moment that, while it far from invalidates someone's worldview, nonetheless calls their words into suspicion. You seem to enjoy taking cheap pot-shots at things people say without properly reading or understanding what they said in the first place, putting your foot in your mouth as a result.

As Spoons correctly pointed out, you have conflated the terms "equal" and "same". Being different, like being autistic for example, does not make us inferior to NTs. At the risk of echoing an historic racist SCOTUS ruling, we are "Different but equal." Our inherent worth as human beings is equal, though our expression of our humanity, be it born of genetics or culture, may be very different.

You frankly seem to be looking for a fight over the issue of race, not understanding the point of the article, which is that being black and autistic brings a unique experience distinct from simply being black or simply being autistic, neither of which are simple in any way. Sharing that experience is not "hijacking" anyone's conversation, just expanding it, but SAYING that it is hijacking the conversation IS hijacking the conversation and making it about your discomfort in hearing experiences that differ from yours. That makes me wonder why you're on this site to begin with. Do you not get enough alienation in your life off this site? Do you need to need to bring it here too? And about race? Sheesh!

SocOf, I really don't mean to pick apart your comment, because I do understand your question for Mike, but it is predicated on something I'm told often by black family members and friends is a myth. There is no single, monolithic "black culture".

---edit---

--- I'm glad the site warned me that someone else had replied to you before sending this, and it was Mike! He made the "monolithic" point so I feel validated!---

I was raised by a "white" mother in a community where my father's Jewish background is largely unknown and, appearing white to most of them, I have been frequently invited to friends' homes where I saw a "culture" that one might define as "white", but was as varied and diverse as I know many black households to be. Assuming you mean "people experiencing being black in America":

I know you didn't ask me, but I can tell you my experiences. My friends and students who are both autistic and POC are often ostracized by their ethnic peers AND society in general, and find the autistic community, when they find one, to be more welcoming in general. They fall more neatly and comfortably into the "nerdist" camp, as most of us do, and find even the NT nerdy types to be more accepting of their differences, whatever they may be.

I think this comes mostly from being part of a minority group. I know that when I have earned my way into the trust and affection of cliques of mono-ethnic minority groups, I have found them to be as accepting of my "quirks" as they are of my "whiteness" and Jewishness. A former boss of mine, a black man who told me he thought all white people, especially Jews, were "Reptilians" before he met me. He told me he knew there was something "different" about me that he couldn't identify (and at that time, I was not self-reporting about my autism), but that whatever that difference was, it made it easier to relate to me as he saw I was an "outsider". He called me his "brother from another mother", which I took as a great honor. He was an admirable man, and quite handsome too.

Among fellow Jews, I get a lot of commentary about similarities between being autistic and being Jewish. There really is a kind of genetic-based neurodiversity that makes Jews (the ethnicity, as distinct from the religion, since they welcome converts) a little different from other ethnicities. Some of that neurological distinctiveness overlaps with autism. In fact, when the educational and psychological professionals who first brought the possibility that I was autistic to my attention, I thought they were noticing the aspects of my personality that corresponded to being a Jew. I am a picky eater, I like to argue, and I have certain physical comfort parameters outside of which I cannot help but comment when breached. A lot of Jews, like Aspergians, are very particular regarding language and "exact words" people use, and find it irritating when someone uses words that seem to contradict with their meaning. Many Jews I have known are very good at recalling direct quotes of casual conversations that took place long ago. This is a trait I have only ever seen among autistic people. I hope this thread grows and I think Mike's answer to SocOf's question has the potential to do that.

We need to demystify our distinctive experiences if we want to demystify the total autistic experience to the NT population. We need to scout out and appreciate our differences as we explore our common ground together.

^^^hiya ScoeyB welcome to the club

What a reasoned, hilarious and heartwarming response, ScoeyB! I'm a bit nerdy-wordy, too (diggin' that hyper- loquaciousness). I could chat with you for hours! Thank you, brother. It would be cool if more autism organizations, programs or advocacy missions sought out folks like me. I'm not angry. I'm not militant. I'm not radical. I'm just determined to work with what I've got. I just want to inject some blunt honesty into the, nearly, nonexistent conversation about how being on the spectrum in brown skin can effect ones physical, mental and emotional wellbeing. I can't change my skin color, therefore, I'm unable to change current societally taught perceptions of people who look like me. I won't even try, but, as long as it's up to me, folks will see me as human. Humor is a big part of creating that energy.

There are a few regular commenters on this forum who think that anyone who is black who is afraid of police is delusional. I hope those people are reading this OP and thread and are learning some things about empathy and compassion because autistic people come in all shapes and sizes and colours and this is supposed to be a support site for all of us to share our experiences and be there for each other.

I hope this thread can help to open some minds to the idea that being autistic and black can have it's own unique challenges just like being autistic and female or autistic and LGBT or autistic and physically disabled. The autistic narrative has been dominated by white male voices for too long and those voices need to make room for the rest of us, and they will benefit from that as much as we will. They shouldn't feel threatened by including us, they should feel comforted by the fact that they are not alone in their challenges and that there are others who, if they let us in, can help to broaden their perspective and make their life a little richer by the variety.

Starting to wonder if most of you people are even really autistic or not, being HFAutistic and being around others, as I listen to you I wonder if your one of America's misdiagnosed, you don't sound logical. By the way, level down the white guilt white rich people, thank you.

Greetings to Everyone!

For all on this forum choosing to be supportive, as I relate my personal experiences, thank you. For all those here choosing not to be supportive, thank you. You see, I have lived long enough to understand not everyone has learned empathy or cares about what another person experiences. The majority of peoples in this world have been taught that their tribe, culture, social class, caste, home town, ethnicity, religion or clan is better than another. None of this is backed up by fact or remotely true. However, there are folks who view themselves righteous enough to claim another person's views are not important or authentic. They do this even while not, personally, knowing anything about said person. This is the product of two things: Ignorance, or, stupidity. Ignorance can be overcome. It is simply not knowing something. Stupidity cannot. It is deliberately doing something unwise, unreasonable, insensitive or dangerous even when one knows the facts, or, consequences. Since Alex Plank is the only person I, personally, know on this forum (and he supports me), logically, I must go with ignorance as the reason for the few naysayers, here. I'm cool with that, though. Brown people all over the world have had to deal with being mischaracterized, called liars, told to stop complaining, dehumanized by mass distribution of negative images (both cartoon and real) and rhetoric, etc. This has been nonstop for centuries, so, for me and many other Brown people, it's nothing new. I could be bitter about all this, or, choose to rise above it by educating my fellow humans through sharing real stories about trials I've overcome, even while viewing things as a Spectrumite. I choose the latter.

My good friend, author and car guy, John Elder Robison, told me, after we'd spoken to each other for several minutes, I have a similar vocal cadence as him and Dr. Temple Grandin. That comparison was surprising, since I'd not noticed it, right away. He, enthusiastically, welcomed me into his 'Aspergerian family' and we've been fast friends, since. He, now, knows me. He took the time to do so.

We can learn from each other only if we are open to it. Not just here on THIS forum. We can benefit from being more open-minded about what all peoples, of every background, are experiencing. Not everyone can or will perfectly relate their stories, but, when listening, it's best to come from a place of warmth and understanding, verses, assuming someone is a fraud, first. This post is for clarity. Say what you will about me. I welcome naysayers. I've developed a pretty thick skin. I know who my actual friend is here on this forum and he happens to be the creator of it. If you want to know anything about ME, just ask. I won't bite. I promise. That's why I'm here.

Peace.

Ignoring my opposing view being held as racism by none other than Mr. Plank himself, let me address some of your points: