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Lawrence
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26 Feb 2018, 1:35 pm

I don't know if this could be an autism thing or if I even have autism ( I'm being assessed soon). One of the main troubles I face socially is the fact I shy away from meeting anyone new. I checked out of joining clubs or an online date. This probably extends to other things too. The easy answer is it's anxiety but the trouble with that is I don't particularly feel anxious. I don't have any physical symptoms and my mind isn't racing thinking about how it could go wrong. I am shy in general but I don't really have any thoughts except it doesn't appeal to me meeting strangers. Hard to explain but any ideas what reason it could be?



ASPartOfMe
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26 Feb 2018, 2:53 pm

Shyness is not an Autistic trait but is often a result of repeated social failures.


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ToughDiamond
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26 Feb 2018, 4:19 pm

I'm often reluctant to meet people I don't know. I think everybody has some sense of anxiety over it, as it is quite dangerous compared with the familiar, but it's often overridden by awareness of the possible good that might be done and a strong interest in making friends and exchanging ideas. Autism isn't the only cause of shyness, but it seems quite common for autistic people to be a lot more relaxed with people they know and have grown to trust and like, more so than the general population I would think.



Kitty4670
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27 Feb 2018, 5:05 pm

ASPartOfMe wrote:
Shyness is not an Autistic trait but is often a result of repeated social failures.



If Autism have poor social skills then too much shyness is related to Autism.



Dear_one
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27 Feb 2018, 11:37 pm

I have always had a strong preference for meeting people through a mutual acquaintance. I think this is common in British influenced cultures. Why should anyone trust a self-introduction?



Joe90
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28 Feb 2018, 1:22 am

A few years ago I joined a social group thing where you attend this place once a week and sit around a table doing art-related activities. I enjoyed the activities, but I didn't seem to make any friends. Each time I went there, I just ended up quietly listening to the louder ones talking, which actually relaxed me to the point where I didn't want to talk but listen to the interesting stuff they were talking about.
The club was mostly for people with anxiety, depression, PTSD, learning difficulties, and anything else that may affect a person's social functioning. I wasn't sure if there were other Aspies like me there. But a lot of them seemed religious and completely outside the norm (for example, don't care for iphones). I'm not religious at all, and although I'm eccentric, I still follow more trends than what I think I do.

I seem to make friends better and fit in better at work. Also I seem less shy at work.


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