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persian85033
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29 Aug 2010, 8:00 pm

One thing I dislike when walking with someone else when they're talking is I can't really pay attention to where I'm going. Like, I always have to be looking at them when they're talking. Like I have to pay attention to them. I've noticed other people walking and talking but they never do this. If I'm looking at them, or paying attention to them, rather, then I can't really understand what they're saying. I can hear them, but I can't quite grasp it.


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29 Aug 2010, 8:04 pm

Its interesting that you brought this up.

I'd like to add that NT instinctually walk together at the same speed even if they are not talking with one another. I find that when I am walking as part of a group, I will often be oblivious to others speed and tend to walk towards the front of the group wanting to get to the destination as soon as possible.

I also hate it when large groups of NTs walk really slowly and block the entire sidewalk because they are having conversations.



persian85033
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29 Aug 2010, 8:18 pm

Now that is something else. I walk at my own pace, which is usually much faster than other people's. It's extremely difficult for me to match another person's pace. That's another thing which makes it difficult. I also have to remember to walk at their pace, instead of my own, as well as pay attention to what they're saying.

And yes, it is irritating when they're blocking the hallways or sidewalks. In school, I hated to try to get passed them on the way to class. More than once I told people the hallways are for walking to class, or getting from one place to another, not to chit chat.


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29 Aug 2010, 8:22 pm

I have a bro and a friend who are not diagnosed but probably on the spectrum just doing too well for a DX. They just walk off, fast. They don't care waiting for those walking slower!I also had a non ASD friend that did this. Sigh.

Then I knew one NT and one AS that did the exact same. Instead of walking on a straight line they walked closer and closer to me, either they bumped into me or they made me change course a little until I was actually not even on the street anymore! Then I shifted to their other side to have the same thing repeating.

NT's aren't pro walkers either! LOL.

Yea I can walk and talk, it's much easier if I know the person and know their walking habits.

One thing I can't do is finding my way to the same place if I walk with someone. Then I just walk, talk... I thought it was laziness, but maybe I can't do one more thing. To memorize how to go to a place I must go alone. Or my navigation skills just shut off.



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30 Aug 2010, 12:28 am

One year in school we had to walk from our school to another for this one class. All the rest walked together chattering, blocking the sidewalk, and going pretty slow. I was usually about four blocks ahead when I reached the destination. It got me in trouble - though I would have been read as weird whatever.

As for walking while talking, I can do that - but then I mostly avoid looking at the other in conversation, so I just watch my feet and move.

One of my scariest moments - a friend is driving me somewhere on the freeway in LA. He keeps talking to me - turning in the seat and looking straight at me WHILE driving on the BUSY aznd fast freeway.

I did not die, but it was very frightening. I CANNOT understand it.



frag
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30 Aug 2010, 12:35 am

When my mom and dad had their worst quarrels my dad was the driver and she used the passenger seat. She was mad and yelled LOOK AT ME WHEN YOU TALK TO ME! Sounds scary? The scary thing is that he did what she said...



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30 Aug 2010, 1:03 pm

frag wrote:
When my mom and dad had their worst quarrels my dad was the driver and she used the passenger seat. She was mad and yelled LOOK AT ME WHEN YOU TALK TO ME! Sounds scary? The scary thing is that he did what she said...


Ay-ay-ay - stop the car and let me out.

I put the question to my wife. She other watches more than I do, but like me may look at the other when HE is talking but prefers not to watch if SHE is talking. But either of us would watch the path, and most talk is done with looks parallel or obligue but not face to face.



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30 Aug 2010, 1:11 pm

I have an ASD friend who does this to me, and I'm a slow walker.


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30 Aug 2010, 1:17 pm

I would never walk side by side with a person in the first place, I always walk behind them. I do not feel safe unless there is no one behind me, so I frequently find myself gravitating towards the walls.

As for walking side by side, that just seems incredibly awkward. I can't say I've actually noticed people doing this though, now I will look out for it and see what they do.



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30 Aug 2010, 1:18 pm

I find walking and talking hard. I tend to focus on the person and let my body go on autopilot, it usually knows where to go.


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30 Aug 2010, 1:29 pm

Hmm.. never thought of this as an Aspie trait - I always walk quickly when I have a destination too. Better to get to destination quicker and settle in, than waste time on the way.

As for walking side by side, and as for not being able to 'compute data' when not focusing on the other person, I do suffer some of this. It is especially bad when I don't know the person well.
I've learned some that if I watch their feet I can keep an even distance away from them and also know when they slow up or stop. Meanwhile, I am still (technically) focused on the person - their feet are part of them. Usually helps me. Dunno if it will help you.

Oh - and don't try it in a forest. Too many roots and rocks.



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30 Aug 2010, 8:59 pm

When I am walking with another person I am not locked in step and have a habit ofwalking into them or stepping on their heels while they walk-I do it constantly


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