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nick007
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25 Dec 2016, 3:11 pm

I have problems reading those things but I was born with a rare low vision disorder in addition to my AS & my brain can have problems processing stuff I can see well sometimes like I could look rite at something I can see well & not realize it's there rite away.


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auntblabby
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25 Dec 2016, 4:21 pm

for people who can't see, does our society generally cut them some slack regarding body language?



nick007
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25 Dec 2016, 11:24 pm

auntblabby wrote:
for people who can't see, does our society generally cut them some slack regarding body language?
Maybe some but most people won't know I have vision issues unless I tell them or they watch me for awhile.


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auntblabby
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26 Dec 2016, 12:52 am

nick007 wrote:
auntblabby wrote:
for people who can't see, does our society generally cut them some slack regarding body language?
Maybe some but most people won't know I have vision issues unless I tell them or they watch me for awhile.

so then, do most of the people you're with who don't know you're low-vision ever treat you differently because of your reduced body language?



nick007
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26 Dec 2016, 3:35 am

auntblabby wrote:
nick007 wrote:
auntblabby wrote:
for people who can't see, does our society generally cut them some slack regarding body language?
Maybe some but most people won't know I have vision issues unless I tell them or they watch me for awhile.

so then, do most of the people you're with who don't know you're low-vision ever treat you differently because of your reduced body language?
I think some I've dealt with have but I don't deal with many people & I'm so much in my own world that I don't notice some things too much.


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auntblabby
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26 Dec 2016, 3:53 am

nick007 wrote:
auntblabby wrote:
nick007 wrote:
auntblabby wrote:
for people who can't see, does our society generally cut them some slack regarding body language?
Maybe some but most people won't know I have vision issues unless I tell them or they watch me for awhile.

so then, do most of the people you're with who don't know you're low-vision ever treat you differently because of your reduced body language?
I think some I've dealt with have but I don't deal with many people & I'm so much in my own world that I don't notice some things too much.

that is a merciful condition.



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26 Dec 2016, 5:55 am

I am rather good at reading body language, and it comes naturally too. I'm good with facial expressions too, and tone of voice, although sometimes I mishear sarcasm but not always.


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26 Dec 2016, 6:28 am

A therapiest once told me that people who has grown up with narcissistic caretakers, can develop a unic ability to "sense" other peoples state of mind and then react to this. The explanation to this is apparently that these children are "forced" to take in their parents emotions, because the parents are to self involved to "see" the child. In normal development it is supposed to be the other way around.

The same therapiest said she thought I was like this, and I think she is right. Both my parents are narcissistic. I also think my autism makes this thing confusing. I have problems understanding why and what all of the small signals I pick up on really mean. So several therapiests have said that I am a suspicious person.

If I have a conversation with someone I can suddenly see that they seem a little sad (or something like that) and then I quickly think back of what I might have said wrong. Then I say what I think will fix it (make them look like they feel better) and that usually works.

Several people have said that I'm nice to talk to. That is interessting because the people who say this I wouldn't say are haveing a dialogue with me, no it's a monologue. They are talking, and I'm actively listening, asking questions and taking in there story (emotions). :roll: this is draining to me, I feel like I loose myself in these situations.



auntblabby
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27 Dec 2016, 2:47 am

^^^^ :o those monologers sound like energy vampires to me.



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27 Dec 2016, 3:16 am

Froya wrote:
Several people have said that I'm nice to talk to. That is interessting because the people who say this I wouldn't say are haveing a dialogue with me, no it's a monologue. They are talking, and I'm actively listening, asking questions and taking in there story (emotions). :roll: this is draining to me, I feel like I loose myself in these situations.


i know this. i shut up and i get told i'm a "cakewalk" and easy to talk to.

i...suppose i can't complain there. the main problem is being able to end the conversation somehow.


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27 Dec 2016, 4:01 am

great you come to that, to me that's a big problem also, how to stop people talking to you, i don't know and people don't take hints easily at all
with eyecontact they seem unstoppable, avoid eyecontact and they go stronger into re-eyecontact mode.
i had, not so long ago someone who was driving and talking and seeking eyecontact, it made me very nervous, the driver looking at me all the time while driving, i didn't know how to stop that



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27 Dec 2016, 6:00 am

Maybe I have become a little rude in those situations. I might not always manage to get away from them without it being obvious that I'm cutting them of basicly.

I think it's actually really rude to talk and talk like that, and just ignore every attempt from me to talk.

I got on the bus the other day and sat down beside a lady who started small talking. I was so not in the mood, and I was going to talk a lot with someone when I got of the bus, so I had to preserve my energies you could say. I tried being obvious by not answering and not looking at her, just mumbelig to an answer basicly. But she wouldn't take the hint. So I changed seats. I did feel a little bad about it, because I know a conversation like that can make a difference in someones day if they are lonely. I was also worried what the other people on the bus who saw what I did, would think :P



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31 Dec 2016, 3:26 am

A lot of aggressive conversation is the result of someone being attracted to you.
And they cannot get it that you are not interested (even if you avoid them).

Many regular people have trouble with some forms of conversation, not listening is a big one, or not asking open ended questions.
Many people struggle with how to end or begin a conversation.
I find being honest is great for ending conversations "Well I have to go now, I'm terribly busy" even if you are in the supermarket and not leaving, just continuing with your shopping.