Quote:
from wikipedia
"Primarily obsessional obsessive-compulsive disorder (also commonly called purely obsessional OCD, Pure-O, OCD without overt compulsions or with covert compulsions)[1] is a lesser-known form or manifestation of OCD. For people with primarily obsessional OCD, there are fewer observable compulsions, compared to those commonly seen with the typical form of OCD (checking, counting, hand-washing, etc.). While ritualizing and neutralizing behaviors do take place, they are mostly cognitive in nature, involving mental avoidance and excessive rumination.[2] Primarily obsessional OCD often takes the form of horrific intrusive thoughts of a distressing or violent nature."
It started for me when I was ten years old. Was helping mom with the dishes and I suddenly found myself thinking about taking a knife and plunging it into my mom's back. It took every ounce of will power I had that night to not do it. Beyond that, I've had problems since with thinking about doing horrible, awful, and disgusting things to other people, co-workers, strangers, family members. When ever I'm around people, the thoughts come popping into my head and I have to do a mental head shake to rid myself of them.
I've learned not to let the thoughts bother me. Aside from the first time, I've never felt the need to act on any of them. Being on the spectrum though, I find that it tends to amplify things since we are naturally obsessive. It makes it all that much harder for me to be social as I don't want to have to ward off these thoughts all the time.
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I live my life to prove wrong those who said I couldn't make it in life...
16 Jul 2016, 1:06 am
