"Autism Night" at a Restaurant

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The fact that your mother wouldn't take care of him is unfortunate, but absolutely not representative of all other autism parents. You are still making generalisations, now with your assertion that autism parents are just looking for a reason to get mad. Autism parents are actually quite varied. I do not know what your brother looking after your mother has to do with the price of beans. Of course autistic people can be kind and sensible...nobody here has said they can't be and that has nothing to do with the situation we are talking about? (Not to mention the fact that NTs care for their mentally ill parents all the time...).

I've no objection at all to such events, but I think they should label them clearly. I have ASD and because of sensory issues I can't stand it when anybody is jumping about and squeaking near me, especially when I'm trying to focus on something like a play, which is difficult for me because it takes all the concentration I have just to follow the plot. So such an event would be horrible for me.

I guess there are two kinds of autism-friendly events - the Library type and the Liberty Hall* type. I'm sure there's a place for both in a civilised society.

*Liberty Hall, a nickname for a place where one is free to do as one wishes. A. Bertram Chandler's John Grimes novels frequently used the phrase, "Come In. This is Liberty Hall; you can spit on the mat and call the cat a bastard." (from Wikipedia)

Oh I agree- ideally there should be two types. My husband, who we now know is also autistic, had to leave one of those autism screening things early because it was so obnoxious for him (I don't think 'obnoxious' is the right word either, but I can't think of a better one). He can handle OUR son's constant movement and vocalizing, but a bunch of kids doing at once? NO. LOL

I like to meet other "quiet" Aspies like myself. There were a few of them in the support group I used to attend.

So, when do loud kids with ASD turn into quiet adults with ASD? Or, is it all something else?

Social factors do seem to make a bit of difference to Aspie tolerance, yes. But in my case it's not much.


In my case, any loudness was beaten out of me while I was young, if I ever had any. Interesting question though. Do we grow / get conditioned out of it, or there are two Aspie noise-types? Or is it that we can stand our own noise but not other people's? If so, no wonder so many NTs don't like us. Hmmm...........

I have always been quiet. I like it that way.

I was always the quiet type of Aspie kid. I was very withdrawn, especially in the presence of other children. I let them doing the running around wild (NT kids actually!) while I preferred to either stay well back or get the hell outta Dodge.

I don't think they usually do. Sometimes I guess. My husband was very quiet when he was a kid by all accounts, and one of ours kids is also very quiet (was from birth). That seems to be just one of their personality traits. I do not anticipate our younger son ever being quiet. Interestingly...We just came back from a camping trip on a secluded lake, and because of the way the forest went around the lake, it was very echoey. My younger son shrieks when he is happy (very loud, high-pitched shrieking) and the shrieks were really echoing around the lake. He HATED the echoes of himself shrieking. He wanted whoever was making all that noise to shut up (lol). When I finally managed to show him that HE was the one making that noise, he stopped shrieking almost entirely. He was the quietest I've ever seen him this week. Isn't that weird? He doesn't like the noise he makes....!

Maybe they have had a lot of autistic kids in there with parents and had other parents complaining so they were trying to get them to all come in at one time. Maybe they were doing it for self interest to have fewer complaints or maybe they thought that parents of autistic kids would be less likely to complain about others kids. I don't know. Thats the only thing I can think of as to why they would do taht.