Balancing marriage and friendships.

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I have recently gotten married (around six months ago) and I love my husband dearly. I am forty, by the way. My husband and I have no children nor do we plan to have any children. I do not have large numbers of friends but the ones I do have are important to me. I have made an effort to maintain the friendships but recently some of my friends have stated that I am not as available as I once was and miss hanging out with me like we used to do. I do not have relatives that I am close to other than my two sisters who live in another state. So friends function as a support system in many ways.

I obviously cannot live the way I did when I was single since I have made a committment to my husband and he has to come first. But at the same time I love my friends dearly and don't want to cut them out of my life. Sometimes my husband gets annoyed when my friends call. He does not try to prevent me from seeing my friends nor does he insist I get off of the phone. I am temporarily living in an area where there is not public transportation but my husband and I I plan to move where there is public transportation in the next year or so and then I will be live closer to my friends and be able to get around on my own since I don't drive. Has anyone else experienced this after getting married (making time for friends while not neglecting one's marriage)? Does anyone have any advice for me?

Ahhhh. Balance. My old arch enemy. Yes. I have experienced that in my marriage, but it was not only in my marriage. Any time I started spending "quality" time doing anything, friends seemed to get neglected. Most of the time i wouldn't notice until something was said...then feelings of extreme guilt. :-/

What I do now, is try to explain to them the best that I can, that I am doing the best that I can. Good friends should understand and listen. ^^

Does your husband have friends too? Perhaps if he spent some time with his friends occasionally you would feel easier about seeing yours.
If you feel it's going to become an issue in the future, maybe have a chat with him and explain that your friends are important to you.

I've been struggling with this too, got married in October. The only extraordinary facet of my situation is that my wife has had horrible asthma since we got married, she hasn't worked a solid month since then. SO, when I want to spend time with my friends, inevitably something comes up. It is frustrating, but I am convinced that it will get better. She knows that I am struggling with it some, and things are changing slowly...

To the OP; most folks struggle with this, both the newly married, and their friends. It is rediscovering that balance, and that takes time. I have seen it take up to two years before a balance is found, so don't be in a hurry. Don't sweat it, real friends understand the change and are patient.