Page 1 of 1 [ 1 post ] 

Moondust
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 29 May 2012
Age: 62
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,558

22 Oct 2013, 2:54 pm

It's amazing how we re-create in our adult lives exactly the same abusive scenario we had in our families as children! It's no easy task! You belong now to a replica of your family of origin, a group of accomplices threatening to destroy you (loss of home and community) if you denounce your "brother".

I come from a horrible family where the only value is social influence, mostly by way of getting money and status at any cost and via anyone's suffering as needed, and I don't know how but I managed to marry a man exactly the same and my longest-standing friend was just like that as well.

The only advice I can give you is do what I did - take your son and run. Slowly build a life for the 2 of you where you're not dependent on a closed, dirty click of accomplices (a cult). Work hard to free yourself from dependence on others' approval. That seems to be your black hole right now. If your husband is supportive and willing to leave with you, great. You have to become a lot more selective in your relationships with humans.

The OP hasn't replied in 2 months, so I don't know if she's reading, hopefully she's doing fine.


_________________
There are two means of refuge from the miseries of life: music and cats - Albert Schweitzer