OCD Support Thread

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Ferapy is much better than therapy, IMO .

I'm going to post what I'm worried about again, since it helps to "organize" my worries .

-I have this weird creepy feeling that pops up unexpectedly every now and then. It's sort of like the feeling you get when you watch a horror movie- this dreadful, paranoid feeling that something isn't right. Whenever I look at a house or a face I get it and it just seems like exactly what people in the prodromal stages of "you-know-what" describe! I think it happens when I look at houses because we were in my cousins' neighborhood the other day and every house looked exactly the same. It was creepy for everybody, but I seem to be getting this creepy feeling when I look at the front of other houses too .

-I haven't slept well since the end of July. My mom says it's because I get two cycles of sleep and then I wake up or something like that. It honestly depends on when I go to bed- if I go to bed at 10:00, I'm up at 4:00. If I wait until midnight, I'm up at 7:00. This started happening after I used a computer for quite a while after bed, and then I couldn't sleep well. I got really scared since that is a symptom of early you-know-what, and I have been exhausted from the lack of sleep ever since then.

Now that I look back at this post it sounds exactly like early you-know-what .

You wouldn't have liked Levittown when it was first built.

Every house in Levittown looked almost identical at first.

Yeah, I probably wouldn't have. It's not just houses, though, it happened when I was looking at myself in the mirror as well. It just seems like paranoia .

Does playing the violin help you with this?

Being in the smaller orchestra group as well as the orchestra helps distract me, but I don't have those at the moment since I am not yet back in school. Whenever I engage in one of my more "special" interests, I can't really concentrate on it as well because all I can think about is whatever I am obsessing about.

Yep it sounds exactly like my old definition of paranoia , but I know now it's just anxiety. I don't know why but knowing that it was not paranoia made feel a lot better and put things in perspective , as paranoia is one of the things linked to 'you-know -what'

At least you have "Ferrapists" here

I've had both good and somewhat bad experiences with therapists.

Same here! I either detest my therapist with all my might, or I really like them.

Thank you so much, Ferris. I'm just having a really hard time because I'm supposed to be enjoying myself but I am hating myself for these weird feelings and thoughts. You-know-what is what I calk it when I get too scared lol . You're truly the best Ferrapist here !

Ferris is more of a Ferret than a Ferris Wheel.

My bad , I though "you-know-what" actually meant something specific ( that we talked about before ) that you didn't want to speak aloud like Voldemort
P.s. My GF told me to tell you you at your age you are at one of the most trickiest points of being a girl , as you get older it get easier - or so she said

You are right by the way (I worded my post wrong)- you-know-what is something specific (schizophrenia). It is like Voldemort when it comes to speaking it sometimes lol! Tell your girlfriend I thank her so much for her advice, but if I was a "normal" teenager, this would be a breeze lol! OCD and ASD are what really get me down! I hope it gets easier as I get older, though . I hope you are doing okay .

My GF was not a normal teenager , I highly suspect ASD ( worse traits than me in some areas ). What she wanted to say was 13 is a difficult age for most , you just have added issues and worries.
As for Voldemort , you have far too much insight for it to be likely IMO
I was 19 when I first had feelings about Voldemort and it was the scariest time of my life , I've never been more frightened , nothing has scared me more and it still bugs me today. I had no internet back then so I just wrote myself off. What I'm saying is I feel your pain and think I know what your going through, stay strong Stampy , I wish I'd had your insight when I was 19 , it would of changed my life

I'd never even heard of Voldemort when I was 13 so would of never associated any thing I felt to it.

It also didn't help me that when I spoke to Shrinks , I said things like , I was paranoid all the time , the TV talks to me , the world is leaving messages for me. On reflection it's no wonder I got treated the way I did.
I was not paranoid , TV's did not talk to me and the world was not leaving messages , I just didn't have the correct terminology or was unable to explain myself fully back then.

I hate those creepy or impending-doom feelings and obsessive thoughts too. Today, my obsessions are mostly about everyday concerns blown out of proportion, but it hasn't always been like that.

Over the years, I've been meditating, especially after exercise or when I'm tired, since it works better. Some of that awareness has transferred to other parts of my life.

My best bet is, if at all possible, to check in with myself a lot, focus on the subtleties of how I'm feeling, and use my imagination: imagine myself relaxing each muscle or floating in water or whatever, any sensation to focus away from thoughts. That practice has given me a better shot at stopping the worst obsessive chains of thought before they cause a panic attack.

Through it all, I keep thinking, "These thoughts and feelings can't hurt me," or "My feelings are normal. It's fear, in the wrong place at the wrong time. I'm safe."