OCD Support Thread

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How bad is the headache? When I had a bad sinus infection, it was the worst headache I've ever had in my life. My thoughts raced but were largely about the pain. I felt even more jittery than usual, like crying or throwing up. If your pain is bad enough, regardless of the cause, you might have some of those feelings.

No worries regarding addressing posts. This may be way off target, but, I have experienced something a bit similar in nature. If you are in constant control of your thoughts and perceptions, and then, suddenly, unconsciously, you, relax and let go of the control, and daydream about something happy, your mind - being so accustomed to being in a controlled state, could trigger various chemicals and neurons to suddenly, rapid-fire, for no other reason than the change from your normal, controlled state of mind, to a state of utter relaxation. It can cause fear, or be scary to let go of control, even if it happens subconsciously. Just a thought I had of something I have experienced, personally.

What is most important is that you will be seeing your therapist, tomorrow. You are right in wanting to get to the bottom of your symptoms.

Indeed, you may simply have come down with a physical illness. Physical illness symptons can include all of your symptoms, including racing thoughts. Contrary to Ferris' suggestion of a hot shower, I find it helpful to wipe my neck and face with a cool cloth, whenever I am experiencing the symptoms you've listed. Perhaps, try both methods and see if you find some relief.

Im sorry to hear you aren't feeling up to par. I hope you feel well, very soon.

~~><))'> a hug to you

Oh my god- you all are so helpful. I can't believe it! I have convinced myself that I am bipolar all day today (not that there is anything wrong with being bipolar, but you know me ). Thank you guys so much. It feels like I actually have some hope left now. Hugs to you all!

@Ferris- Thank you for the reassurance ! Honestly, I am almost convinced that I am insane right now, so it really helps. I originally considered stress as a cause, but I wasn't stressed or anxious when this started. I will follow your advice though, definitely. I took a hot shower, and I'm not sure if it did much but I am feeling slightly better now (although I am worried because I am writing way too much and that must mean I'm manic). My brain has gone through some really weird chemical changes recently, and I just pray that it doesn't cause bipolar disorder for me. I also sometimes feel the urge to scream, although that may be due to the pain from my headache . I would like to thank you again, because this helped a lot!

@DataB4- Thank you so much for your theory and sharing your experience ! It does seem like my headache might be causing some of those feelings. I think either the racing thoughts caused the headache, or the headache caused the racing thoughts. The headache isn't that bad, but it does hurt. Then again, I may just be a crybaby . Thanks again! Your idea seems pretty plausible.

@Britte- I would like to thank you so much for everything. This post really helped me. You are honestly the kindest person I have ever met. Hugs !

I was pretty sad for the past few days, and when I took a few minutes to imagine something happy (I also imagined myself being really happy and expressive in my daydream) everything just fired out of control. Your theory seems extremely likely- I just hope that those neurons firing didn't cause a hypomanic or manic episode. I am trying my hardest not to daydream today because I am so scared I will experience this again. I feel a lot better now, and I will definitely tell my psychologist about this tomorrow, and ask for ways how to prevent it. Physical illness may also be pretty likely. Could it be something like allergies, or the change in weather (it's getting cold, and them warm again where I live)? That may explain the headache, but I don't know if it would explain the racing thoughts. I will try the cool cloth. Thank you so much for the kind wishes! I am not doing so well right now, but you guys have at least given me hope to at least make it through tomorrow before I see my psychologist .

Thanks again guys!

I'm glad your headache isn't really really bad, Stampy. The really bad headaches with no known cause are the ones doctors worry about the most. Anxiety mixed with pain can still cause racing thoughts and intense feelings though. Not knowing the nature of the headache, hard to say what would help: heat, ice on head or neck, shower, massage, sleep, pain relievers maybe. All of those have helped me deal with different headaches.

You said you've been sad. Anything in particular that you want to talk about?

Oh, and one more thing: I have never ever been in full control of my thoughts and perceptions. Not even close!! ! I'm still sane though.

Thanks! I am glad my headache isn't that bad as well. It makes it a little hard to concentrate, but other than anxiety about it, it doesn't cause me a whole lot of trouble. I have had pains in my head for a while now, but it was today when it became more constant. As for racing thoughts, I should add that I had racing thoughts for about 5 minutes. I am working really hard to suppress them now and I think I am okay (they have gone away).

I'm not sure why I am so sad. The only theory I have is that my serotonin levels have been low for so long from anxiety, and it may take a while before they are back to "normal" again. The problem is, I am forcing myself to stay sad right now because I am scared I will become manic if I allow myself to be happy.

I'm just scared I'm not in control of my emotions to the point where I have gone insane. To be honest, I'd rather just be depressed for the rest of my life than be manic! (Can you tell I'm scared of not being in control?)

Allowing yourself to feel happy or sad won't make you manic or prevent it... How would that work exactly?

Being happier helps manage anxiety though doesn't it?

Does it ever feel good for you to daydream or otherwise drift away?

Didn't your therapist already screen you for bipolar disorder?

Sorry for so many questions, there's just so much going on in this one post you just made.

I know. I'm sorry for the long post- if I am manic, then I certainly show the "flight of ideas" symptom.

It used to feel good to daydream until now. I would rather be unhappy and anxious my whole life than for one of my anxieties to come true.

My therapist said I didn't have bipolar disorder, but he never screened me for it.

You're most welcome, Stampy. I am so glad to know that my post was helpful to you! I want to address your response, as soon as I am finished working, as you mentioned a couple of things that I could add to, or elaborate on _ and, no need for you to respond, unless you are around and/or feel up to doing so. I had been having a bit of a difficult time of something, myself, however, upon responding to your inquiry, earlier, my state of mind turned from melancholy, to positive in nature So, I wish to thank you, as well. I shall speak with you, again, later.

><))'> be well

(hi, DB4, as well _ and Ferris, if he were to return, of course)

Thanks Britte ! Your post truly helped me a lot. All I want is to be able to go to school and feel normal like any other kid. Unfortunately, this weird experience has been taking quite a toll on me. Your post has hopefully changed that! You don't have to answer anything- I know you are very busy! But I wanted to ask If it was possible that neurons misfired because I tricked myself into feeling happy when I wasn't really? I hope this is just a one time thing. I am feeling much better now, though!

All the best to you!

No problem Stampy. I know you have a concise knowledge of disorders and most things are a just a google click away. At my last session my therapist told me to stop researching disorders as he said it was not helpful to me , so far I have been very good and not done any tests or read up about the same couple of disorders I always read about.



As for worrying about things that are out of your control like Bipolar , it's easier said than done but just try and deal with things 1 day at time and live in the now - yeah right , I wish I could follow my own advice . Hope your therapy session goes well

Hi SSF,

(I deleted my last post, as it was long, and may no longer pertain to your experience/issue, and the edit tab was no longer accessible. I thought I should mention it)

You're welcome, and I am so pleased to know that I could be of help to you! I don't think that thinking about something happy, or tricking yourself into being happy (Im not sure how you go about that), when you had not actually been happy, would cause misfiring, but I'm not entirely sure. Likely, not, and indeed, it was probably an isolated incident. I hope you had a good day, and I'd be interested to know if your therapist was able to ease your mind a bit, about the symptoms you've been experiencing.

Thanks guys. I'm doing better now, but I got no advice on how to stop the weird symptoms from my therapist. I really don't want bipolar disorder (there's obviously nothing wrong with having it, but I just really don't want to be mentally ill- it scares the crap out of me). The headache is still constant, and I will occasionally get what I think is a rush of dopamine in my brain (I think the weird urge to laugh/cry/throw up was actually an urge to have a vocal tic, since I normally get those when I am happier). The "racing thoughts" were never really racing thoughts, but it still felt like my mind was high/sped up or something like that.

Ever since my therapist challenged me not to look up disorders, I rarely do anymore. I also followed his advice on getting rid of my paranoid thoughts. They are almost entirely gone! I was even eating something today and "forgot" to have the thought that it was poisoned or something crazy like that. However, he still refuses to offer me other advice on how to get rid of OCD unless I exercise and spend time with my dad, which I tried to do before but it wasn't good enough.

The problem is, my mom always portrays me in a really negative way. She isn't trying to, but somehow my psychologist no has the notion that all I do is look up mental illnesses all day and I can't form connections to others. Are you kidding me? Of course I form connections to others! I have so many people who I see every day at school and I absolutely love talking to them. And like I said in the last paragraph, I rarely look up mental illnesses anymore. I'm so sorry for ranting guys- you all really don't deserve to have responsibility for my problems. It just feels really good to get this off my chest, so don't reply if you don't want to any of this stuff. I'm just kind of stuck at the moment. My mom and therapist want me on medication, but there is no way I am going on SSRI's (it's just a personal thing, I know they help many people). Right now I have one of two choices- go on medication, or "try harder." It's upsetting to me because I am really trying my best, and my annoying psychologist has no clue what it is like to live with what I have. I deal with so much more than most kids my age, and instead of encouragement or support, I get put down and yelled at for being too rigid.

I'm really sorry- that was ridiculously long ! I feel a lot better now though. Ferris- thanks for your advice, but I can't follow it either ! Do you think I have bipolar disorder or a form of it?

Thanks Britte! I am kind of worried, and I also hope this is an isolated thing. I just really wish I knew why it was happening and how I could stop it. I really hope it was just because I tricked myself, but like you said that may be unlikely. Do you think it is bipolar disorder? I had a better day today. I am quite tired, my headache is still here, and I am upset over what happened yesterday with therapist, but I didn't really have any racing thoughts today! I am trying to just let the whole thing go, but it is kind of hard when my head feels like it's being squished all day! Today was good though. I said hi to my favorite teacher, and I am still getting all my work done despite this horrible stuff that has been going on. I am also sleeping through the night almost every single day now, which is more evidence against bipolar disorder . I hope you are doing well! Sorry for my long rant!

Stampy, I get that you feel really misunderstood right now and it's so frustrating! Sometimes when I feel misunderstood, it helps me to remember that the people in my life usually mean well. It doesn't help me that much though. Sometimes, bursts of rigorous or fast aerobic exercise also help me discharge some of what I'm feeling. Do you use these tools too?

Don't forget my earlier reply to you. I mention it again now because it deals with your therapist's comments.

I hope your headache improves. Does anything help the headache, or is it one of those really stubborn ones?

~Hi Stampy and DataB4.

Stampy, perhaps, I could be of further help/support to you, at this time, if you are to return, as I have some things in common with you, some of which are related to experiences I had at approximately, your age, as well as some thoughts/ ideas that I have wanted to share with you. You could decide if you think they could benefit you. I wonder if you would mind if I sent you a PM.

I see my therapist on Wednesdays, and had a productive/eye opening session, today, and, I was thinking I might ask for your thoughts, or simply your ear, if I were to talk about some of my issues at hand, as well, here.

DataB4, I don't know if you acquire the same effect, but, I find the endorphin release from vigorous exercise, to have an immediate effect on my mental well-being.

~Cheers

No, not quite the same effect. It's more of a release of energy and a sense of accomplishment.

Ah, I see. : ))