This was pretty much my experience with the Gay community as well. When I was 19 and had left home for the first time to go to university, I became immersed in the community because I felt free for the first time, but I quickly learned that I had just as little in common with other gay people as I do with any other group (generally). lol It was a hard thing to learn unfortunately, and kind of demoralising. Mind you, this was 16 years ago now, and the nature of the community has changed quite a lot, but at that time, it seemed to be all about going clubbing and drinking and doing hard drugs--basically all things that I had no interest in. I actually remember having a conversation with a guy who mentioned something about cocaine, and I responded by saying that I'd never touch the stuff, at which point he proceeded to tell me that I was young, and everyone always says that, but eventually they try it and like it. lol Hate to break it to that dude, wherever he may have (or may not have) ended up, but I STILL have no interest in cocaine. lol So yeah, I fell out of love with the "community" within a year of being on my own I would say. At this point in my life though, I'm pretty okay with that. It makes more sense to me to surround yourself with people who share common interests and the same fundamental values as you rather than people who are just of the same sexuality. This isn't to say that the LGBTQ community doesn't serve a purpose or anything, especially for someone having trouble coming to terms with themselves and in need of support in that way. Having a common struggle can be something to rally around and all, but I don't know, sometimes that's not enough. This might be especially true with people on the spectrum who are also LGBTQ.
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"There are things known, and there are things unknown, and in between are the doors of perception."
--Aldous Huxley