Is it ever okay to look at a women's breasts?

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If he just happened to look at them that's fine. If he is obviously staring at them, that sucks.

Last edited by bullyh8ter on 31 Jul 2010, 1:43 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Last edited by bullyh8ter on 31 Jul 2010, 1:42 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Exactly. If you are man enough to hit me, you are man enough to be hit back. Just because I'm a guy doesn't mean women can do whatever they want to me just like I shouldn't do certain things to them. I'm a person just like they are.

Yeah, and never mind if we find it intimidating, because you males are bigger and stronger than we are, and you might be just looking for a few seconds, or you might decide to actually assault us. Never mind that we have to deal with that threat all the time. Never mind that we have to deal with being objectified all the damn time, so it is very easy to feel uneasy when someone is looking at your boobs. Never mind that for us, it's a real danger and not just being irritated by someone looking at you the wrong way. Never mind that we have to deal with crude and intimidating behaviour all the time and society frowns on us if we talk back. Never mind that we can't walk down the f*****g street without 'Whoooooo!' and 'Nice tits!' even if we're dressed in NORMAL, MODEST CLOTHING. Never mind that we take that behaviour all the time and if we get annoyed we're called humourless b*****s.

Sorry, your attitude just isn't acceptable. You clearly haven't thought about what it's like to be an average woman. I mean when did you ever have to worry about your safety when a woman was looking at you? When did you have to worry about being sexually assaulted?

Here's an idea: Why don't you go find a rich guy, marry him and live happily ever after.

I think that what you are saying is valid and very real. I will however point out that although you are living in a culture that produces fear you should still be careful to distinguish real fears from false fears because those false fears lead to misunderstanding and animosity between the sexes.

I think that a man might glance at a woman's chest because to them women are very beautiful. Apprehending that beauty makes a person feel good and gives them a sense of connection to a person's femininity. Its not always about objectification.

thanks for this.

to me, in a sense it isn't about boobs - it's about men wanting to retain the right to sexually dehumanize women in a public way. this is the exact opposite of feminist progress. if a man were to feel that he is somehow entitled to stare at my body, why would i not fear that he could take further action?

if a person walked up to another individual and slapped/assaulted them for no reason, it could be understood if the victim defended themselves. but if a person intentionally objectifies another individual (knowing full well that it may be upsetting to said individual), then they have every reason to expect that individual to retaliate. i don't condone violence, but i imagine that it is more likely for a person to get slapped if they stare at an individual in a way that deeply offends them, upsets them, or makes them feel unsafe.

just for the record, i have never never stared at a man's body parts. it is just not acceptable. i consider myself highly sexual, but it belongs in a bedroom, not out in the street. it isn't right for an individual person to try to publicly turn another person into a sexual object - regardless of gender.

there isn't any such thing as a false fear. read the statistics:

http://www.paralumun.com/issuesrapestats.htm

Um, no thanks. I'd rather earn my own way in life.

And you haven't addressed my points. For all that you call yourself a bully hater, you behave like a bully yourself.

Not if you were the last woman on Earth babe. That's alright your prince charmings out there somewhere.

"My attitude isn't acceptable": Why?

"You clearly haven't thought": Yeah I have thought about what being a woman would be like. You'd be surprised at how much I think.

"When did you have to worry about your safety when a woman looks at you": If she's looking at my wallet and judging me by my money

"When did you have to worry about sexual assault": Not from a woman, but from gay men.


"Nevermind if we find it intimidating": Divorce court is intimidating for some of the bravest guys out there. They lose their homes, kids, wife and much of their life savings that day. That intimidating enough?


"All the time": No, it doesn't happen all the time to any one person. Period. You aren't as hot as you think.


"It's very easy to feel uneasy when one looks at your boobs": Then wear something else. Rich guys dress down and drive old cars to deter gold diggers. If you don't like it, cut your hair or wear something less revealing. Otherwise, don't be surprised if guys stare or at least look.

Last edited by bullyh8ter on 31 Jul 2010, 2:39 pm, edited 1 time in total.

what? where is there an invitation in this? she said you behave like a bully, she didn't try to get into your pants.

Your attitude is wrong because you refer to women as if they have no right not to be treated as sex objects.



Then you're useless at perspective taking. For a man, it may well be a compliment to have a woman check you out. For a woman, it's different, unless she is very large and strong or trained in martial arts. That guy is bigger than you, stronger than you, and if he wants to do more than just look, he can, and they often do.



Lots of female muggers where you live then?



And you have to worry about that walking down the street, do you? You have to live your life according to what these f***s might do, watch what you wear, where you go, make sure you don't go out alone?



Non sequitur. How does divorce have anything to do with this issue? How does it give men the right to dehumanize women?

[quote]

I don't wear tops that reveal my boobs. Never. And why should I cut off my hair? Why should I structure my whole life around avoiding being sexually harassed? Not showing cleavage is one thing, cutting off my hair is way extreme.

I've gotten harassed even when wearing LOOSE clothes than make me look androgynous (and believe me, I can look androgynous when I want to. I've been mistaken for a male). It works...until they hear me talk in a normal female voice. And then they start up touching my ass, wrenching at my neck, because they can. It's why I don't go out at night any more. It's not about how you look. It's more likely about anger and the desire to dominate.

You actually thought that was an invitation? Don't make me laugh. I wouldn't let you touch me. I'd cut out your eyes.