Love chemicals

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I thought this was an interesting article about the chemical reactions we have when we fall in love.

https://www.bustle.com/p/7-signs-youre-chemically-bonded-to-your-significant-other-according-to-science-9312852

"You really like kissing your partner" and "cuddling is your favorite thing about sex" have never been true for me. Maybe it's one of those things where you need 5/7 or something. Haha.

It kind of worried me reading this because some of these things are a couple of the reasons people stay in unhealthy relationships. Thanks, brain, for producing such powerful hormones to make us lovedrugged zombies.

I think that people focus on the good moments, rather than the bad. Sometimes too much on the measly scraps of good.

I read a quote the other day:



That gave me the kick up the butt to move on with my feelings... Well, I'm trying. Damn dopamine.

It's like, I've got these great chemicals being produced that are giving me these good feelings! ... What do I do with it?

I still don't entirely know.

Social mores have never been my strong suit. As most of us here can identify with.

I relate.

I say I'm moving on, but I'm stuck with feelings.

Feelings are such a nuisance.

They really are. I'm sorry you're still going through that. It took me so long to get over a couple of people in the past.

A lot of this doesn't apply to me (or to many other NDs). For one, infatuation doesn't increase my sex drive, rather the opposite.

1 is pretty correct. Infatuation does create a lot of pleasurable feelings.

2 is not correct. I don't feel I make any irrational decisions and my mood will not be unsteady.

3 doesn't seem relevant since I don't desire sex with somebody I have an infatuation to.

4 seems to be a later development. I can feel all sorts of things when I have a mind-to-mind connection, but that comes after the infatuation is gone.

5 it's pretty important that a couple will not both go into a bad mood, and that one will be poking the other to avoid that.

6 I don't like kissing, and especially not the french variant.

7 I think I can have an infatuation for twice as long (three years)

So, part of the information in the link really is only relevant for NTs.

I think the bad things of infatuation are mostly based on culture or doing things wrong (when it is NDs). So, nothing wrong with this powerful system. We just need to use it in a more sane way that is closer to what evolution had in mind when constructing it in the first place. And the evolutionary function differs considerably between NTs and NDs so much of what works for NTs (like dating) doesn't work well for NDs.

I'm not really into kissing either & like the french kind even less.

I think I'll feel the infatuation until the relationship ends.

The rest of the article is true for me thou.