Have I just done something stupid?

Page 1 of 2 [ 19 posts ]  Go to page 1, 2  Next

Joe90
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 23 Feb 2010
Gender: Female
Posts: 26,492
Location: UK

22 Sep 2011, 3:50 pm

I've got a crush on my bus-driver, and he likes me too (he said he will give me his number when he gets his new mobile phone). I have a few words with him before I get off (because you're not supposed to talk to bus-drivers otherwise if they're driving). But last week when he was driving my bus, a young-ish girl got on and stood there talking to him and I felt a bit upset. I know it might not be anything to do with romance, but I didn't know this girl so it's only natural to feel a little agitated when another girl is speaking to the man you really fancy. So when I got up (before the bus got to my stop), the girl looked at me (surprise surprise, all girls stare at me :roll: :x ) I kind of glared at her and I saw him looking and smiling gently at me, so I walked right over to the driver's cabin bit and just done general small talk, like saying, ''you all right?'' then asking him when his next shift is and if I will see him again this week and so on. So I didn't say anything wrong there, and when I got off he waved to me. But I then started worrying about what the girl might of said after I got off. She might of said that I glared at her, and then he might think that I'm a bit too desperate, and she might perhaps of persuaded him to perhaps not give me so much attention any more, being that I'm desperate for him and glaring at other females who speak to him.....I just wish I hadn't overreacted. But I hope he might understand that I'm young, and that I like him, and that another girl standing up - when you're not supposed to stand up and talk to the driver - was standing up talking to the driver, and I always like to have a quick chat before I get off because it's my only chance, and that being so he likes me back.....I just hope he will think that.

What do you think? Have you been in this situation before, where it you're not sure if you blew it or not, and you keep on analyzing it over and over in your head and getting more worried about it? I told my NT mum, and she said I'm not the only one who has experienced this or feels like this - it happens a lot to people when they have a crush on someone and they are put in an awkward situation. And she didn't think there was anything wrong with glaring at the girl. I didn't scowl at her, I just looked at her and just gave a bit of a glare, then went to speak to the driver. But what if I upset the girl? Or she might understand too, or what if he felt awkward, and might not really speak to me any more?


_________________
Female


Tequila
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 25 Feb 2006
Age: 35
Gender: Male
Posts: 28,897
Location: Lancashire, UK

22 Sep 2011, 3:54 pm

I bet that bus driver gets laid tons and has loads of girls after him. Is he the confident, gregarious type? He's probably a bit of a babe-magnet. ;)

Try someone else, love. Try here! :)



zen_mistress
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 11 Jun 2007
Age: 46
Gender: Female
Posts: 6,033

22 Sep 2011, 3:55 pm

Maybe I need to become a bus driver.


_________________
"Caravan is the name of my history, and my life an extraordinary adventure."
~ Amin Maalouf

Taking a break.


Joe90
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 23 Feb 2010
Gender: Female
Posts: 26,492
Location: UK

22 Sep 2011, 4:06 pm

Tequila wrote:
I bet that bus driver gets laid tons and has loads of girls after him. Is he the confident, gregarious type? He's probably a bit of a babe-magnet. ;)

Try someone else, love. Try here! :)


No - not many girls fancy him because he's really not a young girl's type. I can tell he's even surprised that I fancy him, but probably likes it. Same as me - I like it when someone likes me because it makes me feel better about myself. He is quite a shy man actually. There is another one on it who is cocky and flirty, but even girls don't look at him because he's fat and older. But I like him, but I know that he won't go out with me because he's just a flirty person.

I may be an Aspie but I am really good on telling the difference between flirting in general and actually having feelings for you. It's just vibes I can pick up.


_________________
Female


simon_says
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 20 Jan 2011
Gender: Male
Posts: 3,075

22 Sep 2011, 4:16 pm

You have to maintain your cool even when jealous. It's part of the game.

Ive certainly been there.



Tequila
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 25 Feb 2006
Age: 35
Gender: Male
Posts: 28,897
Location: Lancashire, UK

22 Sep 2011, 4:17 pm

Joe90 wrote:
No - not many girls fancy him because he's really not a young girl's type. I can tell he's even surprised that I fancy him, but probably likes it. Same as me - I like it when someone likes me because it makes me feel better about myself. He is quite a shy man actually. There is another one on it who is cocky and flirty, but even girls don't look at him because he's fat and older. But I like him, but I know that he won't go out with me because he's just a flirty person.


In that case, try not to worry about it too much. Focus on something else.



hyperlexian
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 21 Jul 2010
Age: 51
Gender: Female
Posts: 22,023
Location: with bucephalus

22 Sep 2011, 4:33 pm

there are "bus groupies" in my city who ride the buses to pick up the drivers. you see a lot of girls flirting with them. i dunno why.


_________________
on a break, so if you need assistance please contact another moderator from this list:
viewtopic.php?t=391105


Tequila
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 25 Feb 2006
Age: 35
Gender: Male
Posts: 28,897
Location: Lancashire, UK

22 Sep 2011, 4:37 pm

hyperlexian wrote:
there are "bus groupies" in my city who ride the buses to pick up the drivers. you see a lot of girls flirting with them. i dunno why.


Image



curlyfry
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 13 Jun 2010
Age: 54
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,502
Location: Latitude : 45.373. Longitude : -84.955

22 Sep 2011, 4:58 pm

I think you kept it together well. At least you did something and got a wave goodbye in return. That's better than not doing anything and then analyzing why. Don't beat yourself up, it will pass.



Apera
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 23 Feb 2008
Age: 34
Gender: Male
Posts: 871
Location: In Your Eyes

22 Sep 2011, 5:00 pm

Sounds like a bartender type. Flirting with patrons is in the job description.


_________________
When I allow it to be
There's no control over me
I have my fears
But they do not have me


Tequila
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 25 Feb 2006
Age: 35
Gender: Male
Posts: 28,897
Location: Lancashire, UK

22 Sep 2011, 5:04 pm

Apera wrote:
Sounds like a bartender type. Flirting with patrons is in the job description.


That's what I thought.

Same with checkout cashiers. Some of them get laid lots; some don't, as they're very quiet and reserved.



hale_bopp
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 2 Nov 2004
Gender: Female
Posts: 17,054
Location: None

22 Sep 2011, 5:16 pm

I think this situation is ridiculous. Why wouldn't the bus driver be alright? I don't think the girl deserved a nasty glare either.

Then again, she could also be one of those annoying flirty types. Either way, I wouldn't worry about it. If the girl said anything when you got off she needs to get a life.



CanadianRose
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 10 Sep 2009
Age: 53
Gender: Female
Posts: 564
Location: Canada

22 Sep 2011, 5:27 pm

Chalk it up as a lesson. You fancy the guy - you saw another girl chatting him up, you glared at her this time. He didn't seem to notice or mind it.

The girl may have thought that you glared at her for an entirely different reason, or maybe she didn't notice at all.

In any event - don't worry about it.

For future though (this is where the "lesson" part comes in) - Make a point of remaining cool and collected around other girls and the guy you fancy - it makes you look confident and secure in yourself - a rather attractive and sexy quality that will make you all the more desirable. :wink:

CR



Princess78
Sea Gull
Sea Gull

User avatar

Joined: 27 Aug 2009
Age: 45
Gender: Female
Posts: 224
Location: Massachusetts, or in a cottage with seven little men

22 Sep 2011, 6:10 pm

I know you probably don't want to hear this, but I don't think the bus driver was flirting with you. They're nice to everybody. Maybe you mistook his friendliness for flirting. People who deal with the public have to be nice to everyone. Not all of them are nice, of course, but the ones who are being nice aren't necessarily flirting with you. I'm not saying that the girl who gave you a nasty look had the right to do so (and she didn't), but maybe she thought it was strange that you were flirting with the driver. Maybe she wasn't flirting with him; maybe she was just chit-chatting with him, like most people do with bus drivers. Don't feel bad; as an Aspie, I can't always tell when people are flirting with me, either. Which is why I'm glad I have a boyfriend, so I won't have to worry about that so much, anymore. Set your sights on something (or someone) else.



diniesaur
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 2 Sep 2011
Age: 29
Gender: Male
Posts: 758
Location: in the Ministry of Silly Walks

22 Sep 2011, 6:20 pm

I don't think all you people should be so quick to dismiss the relationship; she said the bus driver gave her his number. I ride the city bus all the time, and I've never seen a bus driver do that. I've also never seen the bus drivers flirt with other people; I think you're probably basing this off stereotypes. They're friendly, but I think there would have to be something special going on for one of them to give someone its number.



Mildrith
Emu Egg
Emu Egg

User avatar

Joined: 20 Sep 2011
Age: 34
Gender: Female
Posts: 8

22 Sep 2011, 6:22 pm

Don't worry about the other girl, probably she didn't talk about you after you got off. And about the driver, well, you can try to get to know him better if he gives you his number and seems to be interested in you, but be prepared for the possibility of that he is not interest4ed in a romantic way. If he eventually doesn't want to meet you or something, just forget him and look for other guy :) But if he does want to meet you on a date or something check if you really like him, but be careful to avoid getting your feelings hurt. Good luck! :)