Aspie women and wanting children

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By the way, on the poll, when I say, "want", what I mean is feeling broody, as in, *really* wanting a child, and thinking, "aww" everytime you see one - not just the decision to have a child.

Although I've never seen a survey done to prove it, I've noticed that with aspie women, they're often not bothered about having children. I wonder why this is.

For me, during my teens I was scared of people my age and younger than me, and I felt awkward around them for a long time afterwards. That, and I don't think I ever want to get pregnant or give birth. It's odd, 'cos I'm fine with teens now, but I feel awkward around children. I don't expect them or teenagers to tease me anymore, because since a certain point in my life, everyone started to treat me very differently (but that's another story). Now I'll try and smile at children, but it feels very false. I see a dog and think, "Awwwww, how cute!" but I don't get that feeling at all with children. At the same time though, I hate hearing or seeing a child cry. It actually distresses me - I mean, that must be instinctual.

I have always wanted one but then started to decide against it even though I still wanted them but it would have to be with a guy because no way could I do it alone and be a single parent. I think it's easier when they are infants but then it gets harder as they get older because of more stuff you have to do like deciding on what they should eat, having to read them, dealing with more people and making phone calls, them being unpredictable and full of surprises, having to help them with homework and it gets harder as they get old and it be beyond my limit. But I know as the parent, I be in charge and be the boss so I can always say no right? I can say no to lot of people over. Say no to parties. It be my home so it be my control. Plus I have my husband and he takes care of lot of stuff. Plus my parents will be helping us out too.

I selected no, because you specified we had to feel actively broody and I don't. I felt like that for about a year when I was 15, but thankfully didn't act on that urge.

My partner would like children, and although I have some concerns (not doubts as such, just concerns) I'm confident that we could bring up children well. I worry that I will have children and my partner will leave as I don't know how successfully I could manage on my own. I don't feel a strong biological urge for children, but I think I would be upset if I found out I was not able to become pregnant.

Like League Girl I worry that they will reach a stage where they go beyond my limits and experience and that I will struggle. I'm hoping that at that point their father or extended family can give them what they need that I am unable to do.

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I don't want children. I've never had the desire to have them nor have I ever been "broody". I didn't even like playing with baby dolls when I was little. I used to think it was because of my Asperger's but I have learned through browsing on this site that there are a lot of aspie women who do want children. So it's just something in my personality that makes me not want them. At some point I even plan on being sterilized so that there is no risk of me ever getting pregnant, just in case I ever got raped or something.

I do not want children. It's just not for me. I made the decision not to have children when I was 10 years old, something about baby dolls and I just didn't click.

Never really wanted kids got pregnant from just being young and stupid. I didn't like babies cause I didn't understand them. I don't mind them now and sometimes look at them and gush. It doesn't mean I want any for myself, it just means I have experience and thus, my views toward them are different.

It's interesting about the posts regarding dolls - I never played with them either. I would play with stuffed toy animals. I did play with one stuffed doll, but that was because it had really long dangly arms and legs and I used to like tying them in knots. I used to rip the heads off of my sister's dolls...

Don't want them and have never wanted them.

i didn't want babies, but i had one by accident (i accept that it was a subconscious desire it on some level that led to my carelessness). i don't dislike babies and children, but i am not someone who really cares too much about them either. i see them as small underdeveloped adults, and i treat them as such.

i was very much interested in my own child, and i researched every aspect of her development. but i was more of a breadwinner than a caregiver for the most part. overall i think i have done ok at the whole parenting thing and i would definitely consider doing it again. but it's more of a logical thought now.

In 6th grade there was a girl in my class who told me she ripped all the heads off her Barbie dolls and hung them from her bedroom ceiling. She was trying to encourage me to do the same with my dolls but I remember I felt sorry for them because they had to be tortured and no way could I do that to mine.

I have cut their hair before because long hair annoyed me and it get in the way of me playing. But I have always played house with them. Even when I was two I would rock a doll to sleep or push it around in my doll stroller I got for Christmas that year.

I used to take the arms and legs and heads off my Barbies and put them in the wrong sockets.

I don't really care if I have kids or not. If I get married, it will probably be up to my partner--as long as he wants one or three.

I didn't know how to vote. Sometimes I've felt "broody" but I think I can honestly say now that it was more of a jealousy thing - I'd look and see that people had something I didn't, were capable of something that I wasn't (attracting a mate, planning and raising a family, fitting in to society).

I got pregnant at age 35 by believing all the hype of extremely-limited fertility in one's late 30s. I decided to have the child as a "well, let's see how this goes" kind of thing, and then I got pregnant again 1.5 years later (and here, it was limited sexual opportunity that led me to throw caution out the window, I think).

It's been very, very hard for me to raise children. I share custody of them with their father 50/50, but I still do a lot of the heavy lifting. I'm a caregiver for them, but it's more out of the sake of integrity (and what's necessitated by their helplessness) than out of natural ability. It very much goes against my grain, sad to say. I think I'm a pretty good parent, but it takes everything I have. I literally have nothing else to give to anyone.

I never actively had dolls as a child. If someone gave me one, I was more interested in building the stuff that came with her (dream house, car, whatever) or counting and arranging her wardrobe (not actually dressing her or making stories for her).