Are relationships really worth it?

Page 5 of 6 [ 88 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6  Next

Alliekit
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 12 Mar 2016
Age: 29
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,182
Location: England

16 Jan 2017, 6:46 am

314pe wrote:
Alliekit wrote:
I know you haven't said it Retro but how comes your standard (for wanting an equal in pay) is ok but it's seen ad a high standard in women for some men :(.

Because men like to be loved for what they are and not for what they achieved perhaps?


And women want that too.



Outrider
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 15 Feb 2014
Age: 25
Gender: Male
Posts: 3,007
Location: Australia

16 Jan 2017, 8:50 am

Alliekit wrote:
314pe wrote:
Alliekit wrote:
I know you haven't said it Retro but how comes your standard (for wanting an equal in pay) is ok but it's seen ad a high standard in women for some men :(.

Because men like to be loved for what they are and not for what they achieved perhaps?


And women want that too.


RG is the exception.

Of all the men here he seems to have the highest standards for what he wants in a partner.

Most of the other men.likely do consider it high standards.



Alliekit
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 12 Mar 2016
Age: 29
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,182
Location: England

16 Jan 2017, 9:20 am

Outrider wrote:
Alliekit wrote:
314pe wrote:
Alliekit wrote:
I know you haven't said it Retro but how comes your standard (for wanting an equal in pay) is ok but it's seen ad a high standard in women for some men :(.

Because men like to be loved for what they are and not for what they achieved perhaps?


And women want that too.


RG is the exception.

Of all the men here he seems to have the highest standards for what he wants in a partner.

Most of the other men.likely do consider it high standards.


As I said previously I am genuinely not bothered about earnings

But there are plenty of men on here who would hate to go out with a girl who earns no money and because of that expects you to spend money on them.



BTDT
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 26 Jul 2010
Age: 60
Gender: Female
Posts: 7,088

16 Jan 2017, 9:36 am

I could go out with someone who works very hard at her art--I wouldn't expect her to earn any money--even the most talented artists usually can't do that.



Alliekit
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 12 Mar 2016
Age: 29
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,182
Location: England

16 Jan 2017, 9:53 am

BTDT wrote:
I could go out with someone who works very hard at her art--I wouldn't expect her to earn any money--even the most talented artists usually can't do that.


Oh yyea I can understand that. I meant in the way that she expects is not that you choose to help her if that makes any sense



Raleigh
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 7 Jul 2014
Age: 124
Gender: Non-binary
Posts: 34,178
Location: Out of my mind

16 Jan 2017, 4:39 pm

Relationships are totally worth it.
I have a partner in crime. :P


_________________
It's like I'm sleepwalking


314pe
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 7 Sep 2014
Age: 34
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,013

17 Jan 2017, 1:53 am

Alliekit wrote:
But there are plenty of men on here who would hate to go out with a girl who earns no money and because of that expects you to spend money on them.

All girls I dated made less money than I did and most of the time I paid for the dates. I admire RetroGamer87s standards but they are not realistic for most men.



hurtloam
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 27 Mar 2011
Gender: Female
Posts: 8,743
Location: Eyjafjallajökull

17 Jan 2017, 4:34 pm

Raleigh wrote:
Relationships are totally worth it.
I have a partner in crime. :P



Comments like this cheer me up. Makes me feel like I'm not crazy.



cricketman123
Deinonychus
Deinonychus

Joined: 10 Jul 2016
Gender: Male
Posts: 317
Location: England

17 Jan 2017, 5:22 pm

Of course relationships are worth it. Take me for example, a lonely 24 year old bloke. If i never get a girlfriend/wife/partner i will be alone forever, no kids, no family and be spending xmas alone when i'm 80.

If you have a relationship you would be in a family environment until the day you die surrounded by loved ones. So yeah, i would definitely say having a relationship weather you are gay, straight or Lesbian if worth it :)



Outrider
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 15 Feb 2014
Age: 25
Gender: Male
Posts: 3,007
Location: Australia

18 Jan 2017, 2:53 am

Has been in two relatively medicore/sucky relationshps, can confirm they are worth it.

My relationships were bad but during the early stages and especially the good parts of the relationship felt fantastic.

If that's what a 80% sh*tty and 20% good relationship feels like, I can only dream how wonderful a 90% good relationship must feel like.

It'd be ecstatic!



Sabreclaw
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 23 Dec 2015
Age: 28
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,971

18 Jan 2017, 6:22 am

Alliekit wrote:
Outrider wrote:
Alliekit wrote:
314pe wrote:
Alliekit wrote:
I know you haven't said it Retro but how comes your standard (for wanting an equal in pay) is ok but it's seen ad a high standard in women for some men :(.

Because men like to be loved for what they are and not for what they achieved perhaps?


And women want that too.


RG is the exception.

Of all the men here he seems to have the highest standards for what he wants in a partner.

Most of the other men.likely do consider it high standards.


As I said previously I am genuinely not bothered about earnings

But there are plenty of men on here who would hate to go out with a girl who earns no money and because of that expects you to spend money on them.


That ultimately depends on her attitude towards the whole thing. I have no issues with a girlfriend who doesn't work and doesn't have savings. But if she's just using me for my money, not actually interested in me as a person, then she'll be packing her bags.

I would encourage her to seek out work for her own good though. If we break up things would go much smoother for her if she's self-sustaining.



Outrider
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 15 Feb 2014
Age: 25
Gender: Male
Posts: 3,007
Location: Australia

18 Jan 2017, 7:01 am

Personally, I really don't give a damn.

Don't care if she's a homeless girl my age, so long as she's of moderate health, does her best to take care of her health and hygiene as best as she possibly can despite her living conditions, etc.

I've crushed on at least two girls in foster care in high school.

My last crush, a girl I liked in high school I'm now only friends with, ended up a high school dropout because she was kicked out of home at 17, and she's since been staying with family. On Centrelink.

I prefer paying for a girl on dates.

If she doesn't have a single dollar to her name, I'm fine with always paying as long as she isn't super greedy or always asking I take her to see or do expensive things.

I'm a big cheapskate and prefer the most cheapest and frugal methods to do anything, and I'd think a homeless girl who's never had much in her life would be able to have fun with me in minimalist ways anyway as she's probably use to not having much money to do things, but that doesn't mean I wouldn't want to treat and spoil her from time-to-time.

Sabreclaw wrote:
That ultimately depends on her attitude towards the whole thing. I have no issues with a girlfriend who doesn't work and doesn't have savings. But if she's just using me for my money, not actually interested in me as a person, then she'll be packing her bags.

I would encourage her to seek out work for her own good though. If we break up things would go much smoother for her if she's self-sustaining.


We're Australian, not American, mate, she'd be fine after a break-up.

Image

In all seriousness, if I dated a poor homeless girl my age, of course I wouldn't be a cruel d*ck and just drop her out of my life, I'd help her get back on her feet a little, as long as the relationship ends on good/neutral terms.

Give her money for food and toiletries that will last a little while, money for stay at a local homeless shelter or even a youth hostel for a little while, and help her work on a resume to send to job places or help her get on a Centrelink payment.

If it's a bad breakup and she's mean or abusive to me, f*ck her, she's survived this long and she can do it again without my help. I'll reluctantly wish her the best and that she can get out of poverty, and maybe give her a few pity silver coins like I would any other homeless person asking for spare change.



DancingCorpse
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 12 Dec 2015
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,532

22 Jan 2017, 1:48 am

I see them as like an anchor and snowglobe at the same time, depends how balanced the weight turns out to be but you only find out once you're ensnared in the delicate union of balance, push, pull and submersion. Don't think they're worth it if you're looking for a relationship for the sake of it, plenty of naturally unfurling progression and discovery to be had outside of the misty pool of companionship, some people live to be loved by another person though so I guess they're worth it if your aim is to have a relationship in that regard. For me they are worth it if you get what you need from it and your life is being enriched and watered, but a partnership is multi-armed and constantly in motion, even if you feel it is a powerful thing you are caught in a slab of ice, they can flourish and seem eternal or they can end very quickly and you might realize you weren't getting what you needed and were unhappier than you suspected or perhaps you didn't realize you were getting more than you judged and were happier than you suspected, the surfaces are steamed up and exotically charged, relationships are tricky to unravel. They are hard on you either way.