Why do girls want cocky, arrogant guys?
You have to be firm with these women as if they were a friend you were concerned about. Don't be an emotional tampon for her; command her to break up with him. If she tries to find excuses "I can change him," convince her to the contrary. "Many women thought that before they found themselves shoved through wood chippers/stuffed in the trunk of a car/killed/raped/etc. Face it. You can't change him." "Here's what I want you to do. Break up with him by this date. If you fail, I'm afraid I won't be able to help you out otherwise."
Meh, bad advice is always fun.
Meh, bad advice is always fun.
I like your advice. I shall use that in the future.
I'll have more comments later on. I have to get to work.
It's also a fact that the "nice guys" are losers in some way:
**They are boring people (limited interests)
**Socially inept (perhaps?)
**They are wusses around women (treat them different then they'd treat there guy friends or just strangers)
**They are too serious all the time
**Have no sense of humor
**Have no sense of adventure
**Are afraid of being their BEST selves, and expressing themselves they see inside their fantasies in their minds eye
**Are needy / in too much of need of validation and approval from other people or strangers
**Are not properly groomed / Bad hair / clothes / fashion sense
Firstly, fitting some or all of the above description does NOT make one a loser, whether they are male or female. The number of interests one has does not determine whether they are universally boring or not. If someone like myself, say, has interests limited to TV stations and highways, then that will be boring to some individuals, but be fascinating to other individuals.
Sense of humour is also something that is individual. I have my own sense of humour that certain people love. Others would consider me to have no sense of humour. But that does not make me a loser.
You know why many of us guys have become needy of validation and approval from others? Because so many women have burned us alive and we're now petrified of getting fired from jobs or being humiliated in the community by women that freak out just from us looking at them the wrong way. In today's feminist man-hating world (particularly in the left-wing "rights" haven of Canada), men cannot afford to be too careful, because if they say hello to the wrong girl, they will become a demon in the community and no girl will go near them. Seeking approval from others nowadays is vital to survival, because those who don't care what others think often get in a lot of trouble. Example: A year ago I innocently touched a female co-worker who I believed was a friend of mine on the shoulder in the lunchroom. She reported it to management. Management told me they thought it was a stupid complaint. However, because of freaks like that, us men are doing everything in our power to avoid these situations. Some managers would've used such an incident to fire someone.
And, who cares about fashion sense? Everyone is an individual with their own style. Don't like it? Suck it up and learn to like it, bye.
DO NOT TREAT A WOMAN ANY DIFFERENTLY THEN YOU WOULD YOUR GUY FRIEND OR YOUR BRATTY SISTER. Many women are not that wonderful to be around, period. Wussy guys should take charge more and dump women they don't like instead of being slave to their desire for sex.
Ah, the 1950s. It is a dream to be able to go back to that era. But now if you do that women clobber you with their feminst agenda. Women nowadays are demanding that guys treat them differently than they treat guys, and that they should stop being bossy and all those things. They keep demanding that we guys don't rush them into relationships. They keep demanding that we're not "forward" or "direct" with them. Some of us guys are standing up and giving the women what they say they want. We are the ones who march alongside them in street demonstrations against relationship violence. We are the ones that give them the respect they keep demanding. We are trying to reverse the statistics of relationship violence and murder. We are the ones that take it slow. We are the ones that don't tell them that we like them, even though we think about them all the time.
But women, for the most part, are lying! They may want some of these things on the inside, but in reality, as I've said before, they would rather be abused by a cool gangsta "real man" than respected by a so-called "loser" (although I resent that label). Women want it both ways. That is almost impossible. Guys that are both "real men" and highly respectful and kind do exist, but are rare.
I'm sure the ladies in the thread can add their horror stories of lame "nice guys", who just didn't "get it".
There are no horror stories. And not all men are looking to get laid, myself included.
I wouldn't tell her to break up but there have been a few I've told I wanted nothing to do with as long as they are paired-up with their goons, including "Liana" further up on this thread. Sometimes its better to leave them to their own devices and learn from experience.
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If "manners maketh man" as someone said
Then he's the hero of the day
It takes a man to suffer ignorance and smile
Be yourself no matter what they say
**Sting, Englishman In New York
I am coming to the conclusion that in our attempt to compensate for centuries of gender-segregation, we're starting to overfavor women so much that males are starting to falter; the declining ratio of males to females in college is but one of the symptoms of our guilt-ridden society. This should not be tolerated; there has to be a middle ground in which both genders have true equality and we're not trying to destroy each other in zero-sum games.
That's okay, but if you know for 100% that there's abuse, then you have to do everything in your power to stop it.
That's exactly my point. Women gained their well-deserved rights, but in the process, they have demanded that guys make changes and become less dominant, and so forth. Guys that respect women have complied, but then end up having zero luck with women. In the universal chain of being, men were designed to be dominant over women. I don't like it, you don't have to like it, but that's the way it is, and we have to live with it and learn to like it.
That doesn't mean that men and women can't be equal. It also does not mean that men should treat women like crap. But men shouldn't become slaves to women, and they should be able to do what is natural. I personally cannot do what is "natural" right now because I have been brainwashed into being always nice to women, and I am slowly trying to shed that image.
That's exactly my point. Women gained their well-deserved rights, but in the process, they have demanded that guys make changes and become less dominant, and so forth. Guys that respect women have complied, but then end up having zero luck with women. In the universal chain of being, men were designed to be dominant over women. I don't like it, you don't have to like it, but that's the way it is, and we have to live with it and learn to like it.
That doesn't mean that men and women can't be equal. It also does not mean that men should treat women like crap. But men shouldn't become slaves to women, and they should be able to do what is natural. I personally cannot do what is "natural" right now because I have been brainwashed into being always nice to women, and I am slowly trying to shed that image.
I say that women that use feminism as an excuse to hate men aren't real feminists.
The problem is that by in large, most people are weak and small. More often than not by choice.
Some people are jerks, some people cave in to the jerks.
The problem lays in that pushing people around and forcing them to do what you say can be a very convincing illusion of Strength. It also seems to for some reason attract women, or at least a certain kind of woman.
As far as the insecure "Nice Guys" go. The problem is, we're busy hammering down what people shouldn't be(and in a pretty contradictory manner with a great deal of frequency), but we haven't really decided what we should be.
And this is when you start seeing the people with a strong sense of character. They don't buy what everyone else is selling, but they don't neccesarily discount it entirely either, nor take the position of doing the exact opposite of something just because they don't like part of it. They find a way to define themselves. Or maybe they don't even need one.
I mean, feminism came to be because women have been opressed for centuries. Some of them have decided that they don't particularly like men and that this somehow makes it okay to pull some of the same crap they've had pulled on them.
There isn't that much difference between nice guys that aren't nice, and mean people.
The genuinely nice people tend to be a lot more emotionally balanced. And while success is not garunteed, I think that they do tend to get it more easily.
I'm far from perfect, but I have the guts to say my mind but I do not feel that for some reason I have to proove this on every single frick'n occasion. I don't need everyone to agree with me, but I will argue. And while I am afraid, I don't let my fear control me.
I don't think for a minute that people are equal. There are ways we should be treated equally (such as under the law). But orientation, gender, or race has little to do with this. And each race, gender, and orientation is equally capable of mistreatment.
They've asked that they be less abusive. There's a big difference between cocky, arrogent guys and abusers [emotional and physical].. the abusers usually act 'charming' [even nice] to start with and gradually break a woman down into submission. Once he has done that he can drop the act of 'nice guy' and turn into an a***hole. Personally.. when I meet a self assured guy I know what I'm getting.. a MAN.. not a a whiny little boy looking for a new mummy.
Last edited by riley on 28 Jul 2006, 11:11 am, edited 1 time in total.
Ah, Knowledge, Wisdom, and Intelligence. Where does each begin and the other end. And what exactly are they? With definitions that are getting fuzzy, it's hard to tell sometimes!
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