Difference between 'crushes' and 'falling in love'?

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yeah, damn those old people! we aughtta' get rid of 'em all! old geezers!

Merle

bah, time will take care of that


im laughing now, i know. tic-tac..

^I agree. They're all senile, and can't ever decide on an avatar.

Well, average life expectancy for a woman is eighty years. She might get enough young'uns to help her across the thousands of streets in between you two to beat you with her cane for what you said.

How did old people get stereotyped so much anyways? My sixty year old English teacher from high school can and DOES run marathons. She's absolutely insane.

It's all those damn dumb youngin's runnin' around.

Exactly. My Gram is turning 92 next weekend and she's still a spitfire. I've good genes on my side when it comes to living a long life.

My grandmother is 88 and she's healthier than I am (at least in some aspects)... then again, that's not hard to pull off...

Easy way to spot the difference, crushes are real, love is in stories.

Crushes can happen at any age, and even if you are already in love and fully committed in a relationship -- it took me a long time to figure this out. This is why people cheat -- they love their GF/Wife/whatever, but get a crush on someone else.

Crush -- instant attraction, sometimes even if the person is totally wrong for you in personality, lifestyle, circumstances, etc. If you have a fetish, you probably get this a lot. There's a woman at work I totally crush on, but our personalities are totally incompatible, and I'm married to the woman I love anyways. But every time I see her, I can't keep my eyes off of her.

Love -- longer term, takes a while to develop, and is different because you can't see your life without this person. They complete you, and not just in a shallow way, like you really like their body, or one or two things about them, but everything is great about them, and you can overlook their faults.

I've had a couple of chances to get out of my relationship/marriage, and every time I faced the decision, I didn't go that route, not because I couldn't (heck, I could have had my fetish many times over now, with one of my crushes), but because I knew that for my life and what I want, it was the wrong thing to do, and that my life was so much more happier with the person I love. It would break my heart to have a life without her.

I have crushes on two people at the moment and I'm 'seeing' someone else that I don't have strong feelings for.

Life sucks sometimes.

The primary difference between "falling in love" and "crushes" is desire vs. intimacy (friendship). When you have a crush on someone, you like them a lot and you are physically attracted to them. Often you don't act on the impulse of asking out your crush. A crush is nothing more than a normal attraction to a person physically and a liking of their personality.


"Falling in love" involves two individuals who care about each other as friends first, and lovers second. When people fall in love, they share common interests and have become good friends because of their shared interests and similarities. The glue that keeps a relationship together is intimacy, which is a very close friendship. When a guy and a girl have become really good friends, they begin to become romantically attracted to each other because they feel a special bond created by their close friendship. And from there, the rest goes on, they have a relationship and get married or they just live together.


Now I want to make a slight note- Many people lust and desire each other physically and that's the whole premise of their relationship, physical desire. They will often overlook friendship/intimacy, and go straight for desire. The flame will die out sooner or later, and when the two realize that they don't have much in common intimacy (friendship) wise, and shared interest wise, they will break up and separate.

Hope my explanation helped

I really don't know anything about falling in love, but I'm stuck on 'crush' mode.

Up until I found out that he was dating another woman, I was deeply in love with my best friend. I called it a "crush" but it was a serious romantic feeling.

I personally think that the main difference can be summed up in a single word: sacrifice. If you truly love someone, then you are willing to sacrifice some of your personal happiness for their well-being. Note that I said "for their well-being" and not "to be with them" - there's a major difference between the two. If it's just a crush, then this typically isn't the case. Just as a silly made-up example, I wouldn't even dream of taking a week's vacation off of work (out of my 3 weeks a year) to help a crush move out of her apartment, drive halfway across the country, and move in somewhere else. If I truly loved and cared about someone, I'd do it without even thinking twice.

Of course, this doesn't include the people who get super-obsessive and do crazy/creepy things for "crushes" they hardly know. They are typically doing those things to try to "be with someone", rather than for the other person's well-being though - as I said above, that's a very key difference.

Crushes don't last, or they don't become anything with more depth.

Love is a completely different feeling from having a crush, and it is difficult to explain. You'll probably figure it out when it happens. A crush or infatuation could be confused with love, especially by a young person who has never been in love before. With a crush, you simply obsess and daydream about the person in question. I personally think that you have to know someone for many years before love can happen; love is somehow both more mellow and more intense than infatuation. Love is when the person in question drives you crazy, but you still don't know how you could live without them.