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dyingofpoetry
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11 Jun 2011, 11:10 pm

Okay.... It has always ticked me off to hear, "Oh Aspergians don't know ho to lie. They are ALWAYS truthful." I've always protested that because, 1. It's not part of the criteria; 2. I am a vey good liar when I want to be and 3. I think it is just another way of saying that we lack imagination, eventhough there are many Aspie writers, artists, composers, etc...

Now, that being said, I have always had this problem, which I KNOW stems from not being able to relate to people easily: I automatically making something up off the top of my head when I want to talk to someone I find interesting and want to know. I don't do this in online chats where I am more at ease. I only do it when getting to know someone in person for the first time. I have no idea what to say about myself or how to start conversation at all.... even if I do know, I feel very awkward, so since I was about the time I started Kindergarten (really!) I would just make something up, which I could do without feeling very nervous.

Of course there problems with not being truthful and I always aware of that. I used to see a therapist and he said that I just need to learn to think ahead about conversation topics, then take a deep breath and relax, but even now (in my forties) I occassionally do it without even thinking. Does anyone do this at all, or is it true that it's completely bizarre for an Aspie?


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League_Girl
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11 Jun 2011, 11:43 pm

I have made stuff up as a kid. When I was seven I said I had ten hamsters living in the bush in my backyard. When I was eight I said my birthday was in December. When I was 12, I said I was 11 when I was at a camp. I also used to lie about things to stay out of trouble by saying I didn't do it. I used to try and blame things on other kids to get them into trouble so I wouldn't be the one in trouble. I used to get my brothers into trouble for revenge and plus so I wouldn't get in trouble. But I didn't make stuff up often but sometimes I did. I did it for attention or to stay out of trouble or to have people think I am cool, or to feel sorry for me.

Plus if anyone can write fiction, then you are capable of lying because making up a story is a form of lying because to lie, you have to tell a story. Lying is like telling a story. Lot of people are bad at it because they cannot keep their fake facts straight so that is why they contradict themselves. I bet authors take notes on their stories all the time they are writing to keep their story facts straight because I have done that before. same as going back and reading my previous chapters again.


But if this counts I accidentally lie because words come out of my mouth randomly. One time a guy saw me playing my Nintendo DSiXL and a guy asks me if it's a 3DS and I say "yes" thinking of my DS system. Then I realized "no it's not a 3DS, it's a DSi XL" I was thinking of the DS part so I responded to that part.



dyingofpoetry
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11 Jun 2011, 11:59 pm

Actually, I'm a writer, League Girl, which is why I can make things up so easily (or vice versa). I just feel weird because all I hear about is how much we CAN'T make things up. Parents of Aspergian kids will often say, "My AS son told a lie yesterday, but he's an Aspie; he CAN'T lie!"

I think I agree with those here on WP who have said that we can lie, we just don't normally see any logic in it if it is easier to tell the truth... which I think is where my problem comes in: It's actually easier for me to lie since I feel so lost at communication.

By the way, on the topic of writing, two of my plays will be produced in October In the same month I will have a book completed about my Asperger's experience; I need to have it done by then because I will be appearing on a local PBS documentary about Asperger's.


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