What did you do today to look less autistic?

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LaetiBlabla
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16 Mar 2017, 1:55 pm

Today I have trained eye contacts and facial expressions, just little smiles and small eye contacts with my colleagues. I saw a big difference in the response. Such a nice day :))

I have also resisted to speak to myself aloud.



LaetiBlabla
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16 Mar 2017, 2:06 pm

yelekam wrote:
nothing, and you don't need to look less autistic to have social skills or interact with people

Welcome to this thread. What did you do today to train your social skills and improve your interactions with people?



jrjones9933
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16 Mar 2017, 6:42 pm

I had a conversation with my apartment manager about moving out, and I think I said all the right things, and nothing else.


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hobofeet
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16 Mar 2017, 6:55 pm

The harder I try, the more autistic I look



jrjones9933
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16 Mar 2017, 7:26 pm

hobofeet wrote:
The harder I try, the more autistic I look

It gets better. Some stuff, it took me years to figure out.


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the_phoenix
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16 Mar 2017, 7:59 pm

LaetiBlabla wrote:
Since yesterday, I have actively tried to figure out and keep in mind the specific rules related to each place I go.

Today, success: I was leaving the hotel where I had spent my holidays. I was with my suitcase at the reception hall. I wanted to exchange stuff between my suitcase and my backpack before leaving. I was about to open my big suitcase (containing all my personal stuff), just in front of the reception door of the standing hotel I was leaving.

I did my mental "rules check" and realized that not only I would block the door with my suitcase but there were plenty of people at the reception desk and it was not convenient to do that...

So I went and open my case in a more suitable place :)


I love the pun in your last sentence ...

"case" ... "suitable" ... suitcase! :)



LaetiBlabla
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17 Mar 2017, 4:09 pm

Today, I have paid attention not to say weird jokes. I also put on earplugs in the bus to help me relax, really helpful :)



LaetiBlabla
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17 Mar 2017, 4:22 pm

hobofeet wrote:
The harder I try, the more autistic I look

I love cello as well :) Maybe you learn music? I try to improve my social skills like when I learn a music instrument. No use to try to play a master peace the day you start, would be a disaster. I just choose one little thing to improve every day and work on it. For the smallest improvement , I am happy.

Be happy :)



jrjones9933
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17 Mar 2017, 9:27 pm

I smiled and took the plastic flatware when communication failed.


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18 Mar 2017, 12:32 am

I walked through a group of youths that were standing outside 7-Eleven instead of walking around one of their umbrellas into the grass.


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LaetiBlabla
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18 Mar 2017, 2:31 pm

Usually, I go to the shop on Saturdays, I buy always the same stuff (I go very quick & without looking at products).
Afterwards, I come back and cook always the same mix in a big pot, the same for the whole week. I am used to eat standing in the kitchen.

Today, I went to the shop, took my time, forced myself to look at lot of products, try to imagine the taste, imagine if I would like it. I bought some different products.

I came back and cooked a nice meal for today (chou vert effilé à la sauce raifort, patates roties aux échalottes et cordon bleu).

I ate on the table with a fork and a knife (still need training :wink: ) and a nice glass of wine.

Mmmh, delicious. :)



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18 Mar 2017, 3:53 pm

I went to visit someone I know today who has lost a loved on in death. I felt anxious about it because I didn't really know if she'd want me there. I felt anxious because I didn't know what to say. But I made myself do it because no matter how awkward I felt I had the feeling that going and just being a listening ear was better than not going and having her think that I don't care at all.

Small talk is so hard for me, but I push myself to do it for the sake of other people.



jrjones9933
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18 Mar 2017, 3:55 pm

Well done^ I also find that very difficult


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LaetiBlabla
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19 Mar 2017, 2:26 pm

Today was meeting different people, changing places, noise and light flashes... hard day.

I'm quite happy I could cope with and actively manage it in a socially acceptable way, even if far from perfect. I think my "coping system" is back on the way. :) Yehah! (It had been in a sleeping mode for some time for some reason.)

I have kept in mind all the time that I was in social situations despite noise and flashy lightning.

I even proposed an activity to a someone. (What I rarely do)



LaetiBlabla
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20 Mar 2017, 12:44 pm

I always take a backpack to go to work, with my computer and my big book in it (to study during lunchtime and in the bus). You look weird when you come to work with a backpack and everybody else with a light handbag.

So today I have switched the backpack against a handbag (just large enough to carry the computer and the book). Less handy but looks more "normal". :)



jrjones9933
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20 Mar 2017, 6:03 pm

I tried really hard to find the right level of annoyance to convey to customer service people, but it only lasted until they acted indifferent and started making excuses. Even then, I only let a little of my inner freakout leak through, I think.

I went and got some food, and I feel better, even though I kind of had to force myself to eat enough. I think I came across as reasonably normal when I was buying the food, even though I still had waves of irritation crashing against my face.


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"I find that the best way [to increase self-confidence] is to lie to yourself about who you are, what you've done, and where you're going." - Richard Ayoade