I've struggled with this for a long time. I've gotten in frequent arguments with other people which then results in that person exploding on me or expressing massive amounts of anger and projection.
"This" is essentially a massive emotional outburst. When in an argument, especially one where I know I'm winning and I'm certain that my information is both factually accurate and refutable, the other person will suddenly explode and start contorting their face, yelling, shouting, calling me names and telling me I'm delusional. Both of us are aware that my facts are correct, and the other person sometimes even admits it, but then they say I have an issue with conversation. I am not the one who explodes mid conversation and starts to project. The projection part usually involves them calling me names and telling me my facts are inaccurate, even when I can cite my information from multiple highly qualified sources. For example, I had four meteorologists tell me a piece of information in PERSON and I also had several books and websites, and the person just decided that I was being an "as*hole" and started to slam me with insults about how I was weird and I was a jerk. I told them they were dodging the point and they just started yelling "shut up" repeatedly. I know they don't want to argue but then why the hell do they start it in the first place? Why would they only want their view to be heard and then suddenly try to disregard my own.
I sometimes feel like it's overwhelmingly specific people who will do this. I've known many people in my life, some who are complete "as*holes" and difficult to deal with, but many will just agree if they have inaccurate information. If my information is inaccurate, I will certainly agree. I don't insult or explode on people, I don't try to mold the conversation or manipulate the other person through emotions and outbursts. I also don't try to silence them using loud noise.
What should I do to avoid this stuff? If I give up the argument I will lose out tremendously (I got a med taken away from me which resulted in massive withdrawal and the doctor said I should have continued it but the person I was talking with told me to stay off of it) and the other person loses as well. It seems like a person would rather both people go down in flames rather than at least one of us having accurate information.
15 Nov 2017, 8:20 pm
