New thoughts (for once...)
After leaving the house and accidentally talking to a girl I'd consider a 10 and not being nervous one bit, I realize I've been living in fantasy. We all have that place we go to in our heads when we just want to relax and think good thoughts, but I go to it too often and use it as a substitute for not living. The fact is, yes I'm picky and hard to please, but if I found a way to get out of the house every day, I would be that much more likely to meet a bunch of "10s" and eventually find one who feels the same way about me.
The lesson here...just because as Aspies we're introverted doesn't mean that we have a free pass to internalize instead of experiencing new things.
As Aspies we tend to be all or nothing with no middle ground. For me, it was either she's my dream woman or she's pointless to talk to, since the relationship is likely to end sooner if there isn't as much of a connection. But what I realized is, am I really happy dreaming about the perfecting woman and not having fun with other women? Not really. While I have a good imagination and can live in my head sometimes, it obviously isn't fulfilling if I've posted about 100 times on this site with about 80 or 90 of the posts about my lack of a dating life.
What I also realized was that other beautiful women, who might sexually attract you and not seem like your type, 1.)Exist more than you'd think, 2.)Maybe they might surprise you and make a good girlfriend.
By having a scarcity mentality, you're putting a lot of pressure on yourself by thinking, "If I don't get this girl, my life is over." I may not see another girl as beautiful as the one I just got rejected by for another month (especially given my lack of a social life) but I will see another one just as beautiful eventually.
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