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Miyah
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22 Dec 2009, 9:16 am

I have been working in a very unprofessional work environment for the past 5 and a half years and have not been happy with how anyone seems to treat others here. For instance, I am getting made fun of for cutting my bob into a short pixie, myself. One of the people of work is harassing me about doing it and telling me that I want to be a lesbian and that only mentally ill people cut all their hair off themselves.

Meanwhile, I did something life threatening at home this morning by leaving the stove on because I forgot that I was hard boiling some eggs. I woke up this morning and found the mess, which I regretted and cleaned up the mess. Well, I told this person and he told me that this was the second time I had messed up in two weeks.

So, I snapped because I got tired of getting harassed for cutting my hair and making one mistake. I told him off by saying, "Do not ever try to compare me to someone else who is normal again. My other friends all like my hair and find is creative that I cut it short." "You're such a snob," was his answer.

How should I handle this because I feel like I being being bullied.



luvsterriers
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22 Dec 2009, 9:22 am

No one should make fun of your hair. You like it the way it is. If anyone has an issue then it's THEIR problem and not yours. You are not a snob at all. Be proud of your new hair style. I always feel good when I get a new hair cut. Some have made fun of me, but I just ignore them because obviously they have issues. There was this one supervisor that would curse to some of the co workers. One time he was on the phone with one and he said "Use your f head." I had to leave the office. It's totally rude and unprofessional for anyone at work to use vulgarity. I just started at the job too. I was a receptionist then. That supervisor quit the job, but I don't know why. I don't like to hear vulgarity at work. It is a place of business! :roll:


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Miyah
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22 Dec 2009, 10:08 am

It's a very unprofessional enviroment, and the things the owner lets other get away with is uncalled for. Sexual harassment is one of the biggest ones here and no one ever does anything about it either. I even have a job coach which comes in and is suppost to help with the problem solving and then washes her hands every time something does arise.

I also feel very belittled here for anything I do, even if it's making on mistake such as leaving the stove on once. Moreover, I also feel bullied for trying to cut my hair myself and it's not like I did it out of anger or depression. Actually, I did it because I enjoyed doing it too.



luvsterriers
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22 Dec 2009, 10:10 am

Sexual harassment at my job is automatic termination. What type of work do you do that allows this? Do you have an Human Resources person to talk to or maybe a CEO? No one should be sexually harassed. It's against the law!


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CockneyRebel
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22 Dec 2009, 10:17 am

I was harrassed about my hair at work, a long time ago. Back in the last decade, the younger girls that I was hanging around, were giving me a hard time, because I got a hair cut, and they were telling me that I was supposede to grow it long. I had the bangs poofed up with hairspray, and they were saying that they had to give me a new haircut and do my make-up. I stopped spraying my hair and I found new people to hang with. I looked pretty cool, afterwards.


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FaithHopeCheese
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22 Dec 2009, 10:27 am

My mom recently started wearing her hair in a pixie, and most people tell her she looks like a model but her boss doesn't like it. She finally told him off though so he doesn't criticize it every time she gets a trim.

There is a good Dr. Pepper commercial where this woman cuts her hair real short--- I wish I could find it on You Tube.. anyway, my mom loved it. :)



kc8ufv
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22 Dec 2009, 11:40 am

Miyah wrote:
It's a very unprofessional enviroment, and the things the owner lets other get away with is uncalled for. Sexual harassment is one of the biggest ones here and no one ever does anything about it either.


I don't know where you are in the world, but here in the US, though it's always a good idea for an employer to have their own sexual harassment policy, it's not required, because there are laws providing protection from that. If you feel you are the victim of sexual harassment in the workplace, or other types of harassment, it might be wise to speak with an attorney. If you look in your phone book, you might even be able to find one to speak to for free.



whitelightning777
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29 Dec 2009, 3:03 am

If you cut it as a fringe, they would really flip out. Document every harassment and see HR. Personal characteristics are off limits in the work place. Of course, haircuts don't make people gay. One of my "friends with benefits" that I knew before I met my GF had a short hair cut. A description of what went down is only fit for the adult forum.



alana
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31 Dec 2009, 6:42 pm

you should definitely document as thorougly as possible in case you get fired and have to sue. If there is blatant sexual harassment going on and it is the 'norm' for that environment I would suggest going elsewhere...even though illegal if it's the 'culture' of your workplace that is not healthy, neither is someone commenting on your appearance, that is none of their business, and that they feel such entitlement doesn't speak well of the place, I don't know if you are in the U.S. but that's kind of creating a hostile work environment.



Lee8
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05 Jan 2010, 3:08 pm

your colleague is guilty of harrasment and bullying, by demeaning you in the workplace, maybe not in fornt of others but their intentions seem to be to have some control over you and they are actualising this with their comments of your appearance. To make such a statement as saying you 'want to be a lesbian or only mentally ill people cut their hair, I understand that what they have committed is a 'hate crime' and this (in the UK) is a criminal offence. I would seek legal support (are you in a work related union or do you have a worker rep?) and also seek advice from your local AS support group.., other advice on here is also useful, like noting down each incident as this is presentable as evidence. Hope this information is useful in making a decision on what to do. take care



Ladarzak
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14 Jan 2010, 1:50 pm

Get out of that place. Those people are way out of line and will never learn. It will end badly. Apparently they are so backward they don't have any discrimination or harassment policies.

I cut my hair too. Have done it for decades. Saves a bundle of money.

By the way, try a timer for short cooking projects and when the bell rings, do not procrastinate. Saves a lot of burned things, I find.



ruennsheng
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15 Jan 2010, 6:15 am

As an alternative, just see humiliation as a milestone of your life ---

What does not kill us makes us stronger!! ! :)

Just concentrate on your work. Meanwhile, you can still find support here on WrongPlanet. :D


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BigBrain
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18 Jan 2010, 2:53 am

most people "them" have "herd" syndrome they are like cows all playing follow the leader and everyone one of them has to be similar so they fear anything thats not part of the herd this is normal "them" action I find to diffuse "them" actions i use "us" responses when someone says your hair is so weird do you think this is LA I simply respond my girlfriend thinks i look good like this so im trying to keep her happy I dont like this hair style either this works wonderfully well and usually they will respond in like such as yeah i hear ya my wife makes me wear these pants they are so uncomfortable i wish i could wear the kind i like , now of course im lying but hey at least they think im in the herd