People NOT adding you on facebook

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Hey, this is petty but it still hurts. Aren't former classmates supposed to try and add you if they know you? You know, like make an initiative? I can honestly count the number of times that's happened. There's no way they could have forgotten me. Jeez. What could they have had against me?

And sometimes people I've known won't add me. Oh they have 438 or so friends, so they're not discriminating, but they have something against me... se la vi(SP?)

I think people add others they feel some form of connection with - however trivial. The problem with being an Aspie is that we don't make good connections with people. I have had quite a few adds rejected on FB from people I have invited. That is an important thing - yes they may have 438 friends but they have probably rejected about 1000 other requests.

I really don't take adding on FB too seriously. Most people just do it to make themselves seem more popular than they actually are.

I used to be one of those friend hogs for a while and I'd add whoever I thought had an attractive profile picture (girl-wise). I also use to see my Facebook friend count as a gauge of popularity, but now I've just given up on that end.

Aspies seem to lack an element of being able to network well, and on some days I see Facebook more of torture than anything else.

I am a bit like that. I used to be a on FB all the time and tried to network as well as I could. I had some limited success with this but in the end found it to be very time consuming and onerous.

And this is a bad thing, I only had a few friends in school that I keep in contact with, all the others I really don't care to have as friends, I am not interested in any of their lives then or now, why should I need them on my FB page, so what if they have 438 so called friends who they hardly know or never met

This is the reality of adding on FB - superficiality at its worst.

Its silly having to base your self worth by your friend count on some social networking site, real
friends are more important then what amounts to acquaintances you have nothing in common with

Absolutely - most of these people aren't friends, anyway. At best they are aquaintences. Real self worth has to come from the self - ie it has to be something you generate yourself. For people who are lonely (and many Aspies are), this can be hard but nonetheless that is the true nature of self worth.


Exactly - see above.

BTW - Friskygirl has a cute avatar!! !! !

I understand all this, believe me, but it still kinda bugs me sometimes. It kinda pisses me off that people in my grade level will add my siblings, then not even bother ask me. That's people for you though.

People use their facebook accounts the way they see fit.

Some may choose to add anyone they know or have a contact with. Others may prefer not to add people they know in real life, because it feels an intrusion of their internet privacy.

And some people are just petty - "I'm not going to add him/her because they insulted me 10 years ago".

I didn't sign up on facebook for a long time after everyone else did because it wouldn't let me use the name Earl Purple, because Purple got flagged as an invalid surname. And I didn't want to use my real name, but eventually I did.

I declined my mother when she requested me as a friend.

Good call - no way I would ever want my oldies as friends on facebook.

I have had this happen to me as well.

Three people of whom I was close to growing up have denied my friend requests on FB. One I think has outright blocked me, another one may of blocked me (but has also cut himself out of most HS relationships IRL), and the last one still has his FB page open, but keeps denying my friend requests (also doesn't respond to my emails and has a few people from school on FB).

People use FB for different things and different types of socialization. I have also learned too, that if a person denying your friend requests bothers you, if you feel comfortable IRL, have a conversation with them. That has solved this issue for me on a few different fronts, or in the very least got a good explanation as to why my FB requests were denied.

i joined facebook about 1 year ago at the request of a girl who was on an australian asperger site. she and i decided to leave that site as it became only parents discussing meds for their toddlers.

on the first day of us joining facebook, she had 1 friend on facebook and so did i. we were our only friends.

then she got taken by a new group of young males that were " dudes that were hip", and she changed her personality and joined a band after some male admirers asked her to, and then she skyrocketed in popularity. she posts pics of herself now where she is among drunken heavily tattoed males all sticking their tongues out and acting in a way that i can not understand.

she has got about 600 friends now and they have swept her off her feet.
she forgot about me and i still have only one friend on facebook and that is her.

i never go there any more.
it is just a festival of socially mighty people who vie for popularity, and in that realm i am insignificant.

i can not understand all their jargon and stuff.

facebook is not important to me.

Some people are pickier about who they add or accept than others. I'm quite shy about adding people so I can relate to those who don't give me a friend request after a moment's notice. However, I add pretty much everyone who adds me, provided I've actually met you at least once before. I have fewer "friends" on Facebook than most of my peers (less than 100), but I like to think that has a lot to do with my relative shyness about adding people.

I have unfriended one person, and that was the person elected as student entertainment officer at my university. We spoke once during his campaign to be elected and he was quite rude, and soon after he sent me a friend request. I added him anyway, because I add everyone, but then it transpired that he was adding everyone on the college network (regardless of whether he had even met them) as part of his campaign to be elected. He won in a landslide and then went on to regularly send everyone on his friend list invites to college social events. I by then had left my university and was quite annoyed by this, so I unfriended him. That's what it takes to get me to unfriend you!