Personal questions and ulterior motives from co-worker

Page 1 of 1 [ 5 posts ] 

Keeno
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 8 Mar 2006
Age: 49
Gender: Male
Posts: 4,875
Location: Earth

07 Feb 2010, 7:46 am

During the last week, a co-worker has suddenly been overly curious about Asperger's, and bombarding me with questions about Asperger's. Some may be seen as having an ulterior motive.

One question was, "How do you expect people to treat you [as an Aspie]?". I gather he was hoping for me to tell him I expect to be treated differently. Which is exactly the opposite to how I answered.

Another question was, "Would (or should) you live in an Asperger community?". Something I can see the benefits of, but some may find the question patronising.

The guy may well have ulterior motives. For example there was a time he was accompanying me to the bank, and asked in front of everyone there how much money was being banked. I pointed out that was a private matter we shouldn't talk about in front of everyone. In response, he aggressively snapped, "Oh shut up. I'm just trying to make polite conversation!", in a way that was mind-colonising for me for a few hours afterwards.



Aimless
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 1 Apr 2009
Age: 66
Gender: Female
Posts: 8,187

07 Feb 2010, 7:49 am

It sounds creepy to me. I think your instincts could be telling you something. I like your term "mind colonizing".


_________________
Detach ed


Metal_Man
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 3 Feb 2007
Age: 56
Gender: Male
Posts: 895
Location: The Gates of Babylon

07 Feb 2010, 7:52 am

This guy is trying to set you up to fail. Don't tell him anything person about your self at all. Your instincts are right and take it from someone who has been there.


_________________
Can't get it right, no matter what I do, guess I'll just be me and keep F!@#$%G up for you!
It goes on and on and on, it's Heaven and Hell! Ronnie James Dio - He was simply the greatest R.I.P.


AukidsMag
Tufted Titmouse
Tufted Titmouse

User avatar

Joined: 3 Dec 2009
Gender: Female
Posts: 29

07 Feb 2010, 8:01 am

Maybe he is just curious and is considering that he or someone in his family may have Aspergers?



Lene
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 27 Nov 2007
Age: 38
Gender: Female
Posts: 3,452
Location: East China Sea

07 Feb 2010, 9:18 am

Keeno wrote:
During the last week, a co-worker has suddenly been overly curious about Asperger's, and bombarding me with questions about Asperger's. Some may be seen as having an ulterior motive.

One question was, "How do you expect people to treat you [as an Aspie]?". I gather he was hoping for me to tell him I expect to be treated differently. Which is exactly the opposite to how I answered.

Another question was, "Would (or should) you live in an Asperger community?". Something I can see the benefits of, but some may find the question patronising.


I would personally find this very insulting and to be honest, you would be entitled to complain to a superior about it if you wanted. Imagine if he were to ask the same questions to someone who was in a wheel-chair or an ethnic minority.
Quote:
The guy may well have ulterior motives. For example there was a time he was accompanying me to the bank, and asked in front of everyone there how much money was being banked. I pointed out that was a private matter we shouldn't talk about in front of everyone. In response, he aggressively snapped, "Oh shut up. I'm just trying to make polite conversation!", in a way that was mind-colonising for me for a few hours afterwards.


Very worrying. I think Metal_Man is correct; this guy has a chip on his shoulder for some reason and is trying to make you look bad.