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tomart109
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Joined: 2 May 2010
Age: 69
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03 May 2010, 6:06 pm

Hi everyone,
I was here a couple of years ago, but lost everything (homeless) now i'm back, and hope for some sharing, camaradarie, insights, support.
(Back then I frequented the 'Dino-Aspie Cafe', is that still around, somewhere?)

I'm 55 yrs old, and I wish I had discovered Asperger's way earlier in life, it would have explained so much, and helped me understand what was "wrong with me."

I still haven't found a job that suits and supports me, despite a fair amount of work experience and a year with NJ DVR. I find it's best when it's just me and one boss, like a print shop where the owner ran the presses and I did the computer front end/prepress. It's like growing up on the farm, helping my father. I can adjust to one person's expectations, rules, limits, boundaries, but when I've worked in larger companies, all the conflicting rules, beliefs, politics, pretenses, dissembling, just confuse and frustrate me. I inadvertently but inevitably step on someone's toes, say or do something wrong, and often no one even tells me what I did, but there's some unspoken stigma that taints me, and I become the butt of hurtful jokes.

Left alone to do clearly-understood tasks, and one-on-one work discussions, I'm fine. But socially... inept, clumsy, and it's awfully frustrating, especially with women. I have been married twice, 5 years & 10 years, but both women really really wanted children, and I wanted love and intimacy. Both ended before I heard of AS, and I believe that Aspie-awareness would have helped. Assuming she understood and believed in it, which I keep finding is a problem with people. Possibly it's because I'm poor at explaining/advocating things (to people) - usually they end up believing the opposite of what I argue for. :(

Now I get SSI, which pays me almost, but not quite enough to get by, but Thank God! for that. Now I need to find some paying job, in this economy, that I can stand and hold on to.

Thanks for reading. 8O



AspieForty
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Joined: 4 Apr 2010
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03 May 2010, 6:12 pm

You're not alone... wish I had a magic bullet phrase, but most of the stories here reflect my own story.

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3/3 children diagnosed Asperger/PDD-NOS(2009-2010)
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Aspie+PTSD http://www.wrongplanet.net/postt125554.html don't/won't dwell on it
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JetLag
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03 May 2010, 8:28 pm

Welcome back to the neighborhood, tomart109.


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CockneyRebel
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03 May 2010, 8:32 pm

Welcome back to WrongPlanet, and welcome to my time warp.:)


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tomart109
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Joined: 2 May 2010
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03 May 2010, 10:54 pm

Thanks, AspieForty, Jetlag, and CockneyRebel; it's nice to be welcomed. :)



makuranososhi
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03 May 2010, 10:59 pm

Welcome back. However, please read your private message immediately.


M.


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Scientist
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04 May 2010, 12:48 pm

Hello tomart109, welcome back, enjoy your stay on the Wrong Planet!


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1975, ASD: Asperger's Syndrome (diagnosed: October 22, 2009)

Interests: science, experimental psychology, psychophysics, music (listening and playing (guitar)) and visual arts

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Tequila
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04 May 2010, 12:53 pm

Welcome back.