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Feeling so empty when it comes to anything related to love

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Mootoo
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05 Oct 2010, 7:13 pm

So... I've never had a sexual partner. Or real love for that matter; to make it worse I didn't even have parental love (it was a dysfunctional family, so it's just hopeless)... I don't have friends, either. But I have/had loads of fantasies, even before the age of 10 (mostly involving bondage).

So, I'm kinky... gay, and have AS (which entails disastrous social skills, making dating impossible)... it's truly hopeless for me, isn't it?



Erisad
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05 Oct 2010, 7:46 pm

I feel hopeless too. I've never had anyone really love me either, not even my family. They f*****g despise me but hide it with a fake smile. I have friends but I've been having difficulty connecting to them lately. I'm suddenly concerned that all of them are only pretending to be my friend and are only putting up with me because of my AS. Not to mention I'm hopeless in the dating field. So yeah, I'm feeling terrible too. :(



Mootoo
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05 Oct 2010, 8:01 pm

I even came up with a similar score when I took the traits test some days ago (both NT/AS)! We must really be in the lair of the chasm of darkness...



Erisad
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05 Oct 2010, 8:10 pm

Mootoo wrote:
I even came up with a similar score when I took the traits test some days ago (both NT/AS)! We must really be in the lair of the chasm of darkness...


Yeah, I guess. I don't wanna be alone forever. I can't afford to be. I want to find someone IRL that I can confide in. I'm too afraid that everyone will betray me though. :(



Life_In_Defiance
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05 Oct 2010, 10:39 pm

I can be described just as Mootoo described himself and have had similar experiences regarding family issues as you guys. sometimes i feel as if I were to be destined to be alone in life and i am afraid about what could happen in the future. I really wish you guys the best in life and may you find someone who truly loves you and appreciates you by who you are.



superboyian
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06 Oct 2010, 12:51 am

I never feel so empty when it comes to love unless the relationship became far distant and that's definitely one thing that I worry about when mine moves out of London. :(


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palmtoka
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29 Jul 2016, 9:47 pm

I have this feeling of being afraid to having a girlfriend, yet wanting to have one nonetheless.

Given that I have only one female friend in real life who I have only met once in Tokyo,
this will be a challenge for me.

I keep telling myself that it is just not the right time and that
there IS a special someone that can turn my world around,
somewhere in this world or even on this forum.


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