Need help- problems aspergers causes for me

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AardvarkGoodSwimmer
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15 Jul 2011, 3:41 pm

NicoleR wrote:
. . . This last question might seem a little random but I was wondering if it was anything to do with aspergers; when someone is physically talking behind my back or is anywhere near my back my spine starts to tingle and hurt a lot. It can make me hunch over or sit down.

I know parts of my body such as my shoulder, side, abdomen can become "sensitized" either in a bad way through worrying about them or in a good way if there's been a good and respectful touch.

Too many conversations at once, past a certain point both time and quantity, can overwhelm me. And it bothers me if it is a mean-spirited conversation, even if I'm not the recipient. And often (usually) there's nothing I can do. That part bothers me, too.



meldfaerie
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15 Jul 2011, 6:11 pm

I also have a problem with getting "hyper-focused", that is the proper term, with a project, whether it is reading, watching TV, knitting or whatever. I don't hear, see or recognize anything around me. My husband is the worst about talking to me before getting my attention, and I usually only catch the last word or two, if that. He gets really angry with me, I think he wants me to be waiting on him to speak anyway, and won't repeat what he said, which makes me angry. I have to remind him constantly to get my attention before he speaks to me if I am occupied by an activity. You can tell others that you hyper-focus and that they need to get your attention first, especially friends and family.

My "suggestion", since I am not a doctor or psychologist, is to set an alarm at perhaps 10 min intervals, or if reading, stop at the end of each chapter and take a few minute break, go potty, get a drink, whatever. If you do this long enough, like anything else, you will condition yourself to break naturally. At bedtime, DO NOT start any activity that you know you will hyper-focus on. Turn out the light and go to sleep. If you have trouble falling asleep, try Chamomile tea, warm milk or see your doctor for a sleep aid.

Find new activities that require a shorter duration to complete, you can try them at home in privacy to see if you like them first. Or ask a friend to be a "monitor", especially if u have a good roommate, and remind you that you have been at an activity for an extended time.



AardvarkGoodSwimmer
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16 Jul 2011, 11:22 am

NicoleR wrote:
As the above says thank you so much for all the replies I have received, they have all been very helpful indeed! The best thing about this website is the fact that people are so open and honest here. The time and effort people must have spent replying to me also means a lot to me :) . . .
You're very welcome! I think you will find WP a pretty energetic group where people are in there trying :) , and I'm glad I was able to do my part.