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Summer_Twilight
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30 Nov 2011, 4:35 pm

Earlier this afternoon, I had sat down to work on a class project at a computer with a scanner because all the computers elsewhere were taken due to it being final week at my University library. Nearly fifteen minutes ago, a woman walked up to me and said, "So, I need to scan something and you are sitting at a scanner's computer." I then responded back and said, "You know you could have said excuse me. You didn't need to be a snob about it." She then took offense by telling me that I was a bigger snob. I then told her to get over herself which made her walk away and say, "Never mind, he's being polite by getting off."

However, are there better ways to handle this situation without calling them a snob and for them to get over themselves?

At the same time, people have been manipulative for the last three days insisting that they use my computer or asking to borrow my card. I snapped because that was fourth person who was being manipulative.

How should I set boundaries with people next time?



Wallourdes
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30 Nov 2011, 5:08 pm

Keep polite, calm and neutral in tone and grammar.

If you don't want them to use your card say you rather not borrow your card, when you don't want them to use your computer say that you are busy atm.

Just state your boundaries short and concrete, then there can't be much lack of clarity of your wishes.


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Summer_Twilight
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30 Nov 2011, 5:50 pm

I had snapped because it happens to be finals week, and other students have been extremely manipulative for the last three days.

1. I was on a computer on Monday, and one of them came up to me and said, "Excuse me," and that they had a project that they needed to print and asked if they could borrow my computer really quick to print something off.

2. A student asked to borrow my student ID because he had run out money on his to print something off yesterday while I was busy typing.

3. Today, another student asked me if I was going to the library and I had said yes and if he needed anything. He then tried to tell me that he left his ID in the car and wanted to know if he could use mine to get in.

4. The girl about fifteen minutes later just approached me and said, "So I have a project that's due today and I need to get on and use the scanner."

It's not just with me, people have been going around and manipulating other students. I had spoken to a few other students about this girl and they agreed that she was nasty. (It's not that the world is out to get me and I realize that. Normally, it's not this bad). I just got tired of being bothered because someone else's fancy didn't get tickled.



Wallourdes
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30 Nov 2011, 6:24 pm

Well, that makes the situation more clear, but people manipulating people is to be expected.

To repel such people is to make yourself look less vulnerable and thus a harder target, has to do with path of least resistance
(http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Principle_of_least_effort).


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