Turns out I don't know how to budget

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I'm horrible at budgeting as well. I think one of the biggest problems for me is that due to my sensory integration problems I can't be in supermarkets for long before crashing. All the noise and the people is just too much to handle. So I just go quickly into the shop, grab what I need without looking at the price and then quickly out.

@Hermier:

Yes, your mother should have spelled it out for you and taught you step by step how to do things. I do that with my kids. I spend a lot more time with my girls about kitchen, sewing, and cleaning things than I do the boys, but I still taught the boys how to do basic things.

The way I do it and did it is have them help me. Explain each step as we are doing it and why. Here is an example. To a 12yo I might say "Go gether up all the dirty towels and washcloths" and when they do I have them bring them to me in the laundry room. If they haven't been in there doing laundry before or only a few times, I say here, hand them to me one by one. I explain that I do the towels seperately and that I have to lay them evenly in there so it will work right. I have them look to see what I mean by evenly. I tell them to always wash towels on hot unless they are new towels with colors. I tell them the setting to strt it on and let them start it. I'll do that a few more times with laundry then I'll ask them to do something, like a load of jeans. I'll tell them "No more than about 7 pairs or it's too much, and wash them on warm water and normal setting. Half a cup of soap". THey can do that by themselves. I can throw in asking them to do a skill that they are taught at times for me, when I'm doing something else.

Cooking, that's something that my girls have been helping me with for years and are to the point where they younger one can make most things I make and the older one can make everything I make, including some things I can't make, although both still ask questions, especially about the timing of cooking things for a larger meal with several items.

Teaching them how to do the grocery shopping like I do is still ongoing. They like to go and pick up what they want for the day and that's all. There is nothing wrong with that if they want to shop that way. I did that too, or by few days at a time or week at the most, for years. For quite a while now, I've done monthly shopping and only gone back to get the things that don't last a month. Milk every few days, eggs weekly, butter about weekly, fresh vegetables on the day I'm going to cook them. They know I start making my list several days beforehand, and I divide it up into sections of meat, dairy, baking goods, canned goods, boxed dinners and boxed rice, canned meat, baking supplies, cereal and breakfast foods, snacks, condiments, pasta, spices, cheese. I'll teach them by asking them for example to go count the cans of tomatoes on the top shelf over the mixer. How many of crushed and how many of diced. Then when they tell me how many are left, I ask them to move those to the front so we can put the newer ones in the back and I tell them I will need x many of diced and x many of crushed for the month because I keep that many around. I try and keep a stocked pantry of staple foods that we eat that I can use to make a variety of things. They know what all we keep in there by now, and over time, showing them how I go about making my list, they will learn it, so if they want to do that for their familys, they will know how. Or if I break my leg and can't do it for us for a while, they can do it.

I will post my method, later on this evening or tomorrow, as i said in a previous post. Those were just examples of teaching how to do things.

But yes, your mother should have taught you how to do stuff like that. Parents are responsible for more than just taking care of you while you live with them. They are responsible for teaching you practical skills for living when you are out on your own. If I did everything for my kids and taught them nothing about how to do those things, I would be guilty of neglect.

Teaching them how to do it doesn't mean I won't do it for them anymore. I'll still do the things most of the time. They simply need to know how, and since they don't have home ec in schools anymore, there would be no other way for them to learn it.

Frances

I don't understand the microwave cake thing at all! The crepes, I can see because it's an easy breakfast or brunch or even dinner food. You can do a lot with them. I would think if they offered it for four years, the first year would be basic things like eggs, pancakes, meatloaf, vegetables, rice, cakes and pies, fudge. Maybe basic sewing and cleaning. Basic baby care. Shopping and budgeting. Then they can move to the more advanced skills for subsequent years if someone wanted to take those.

If I were going to teach a course in home ec, this is what I would include for the year. Keep in mind I am NOT a teacher.

Basic meal preperation: Bacon, eggs, biscuits, pancakes, grits, sausage, gravy. Meatloaf, spaghetti and meatballs, lasagne, fried chicken, rice and gravy, tuna casserolle, fried catfish, pork chops, scalloped potatoes, fresh vegetables. Cake and icing, fruit pies, fudge, pudding. Basic white bread, basic cornbread. Ice tea, coffee, punch.

Making a simple family budget for food, utilities, insurance, mortgage, savings, and extras

Laundry and mending

Simple sewing

Basic housekeeping

If I had time, I would touch on basic child care


In the more advanced classes, I would teach holiday meal perperation. More advanced meals and baking.

More advanced sewing

I would also teach crafts such as knitting and crochet, wreath making, etc to be used for the home.

I would get someone to come in and discuss more advanced savings and investments.


Frances

I'll have to come back and read these last replies later. Brain is telling me to write my story.

I just wanted to say that I learned how to make Dahl (kinda, I watched/memorised) and the rote bread was easy enough to make. Was quite filling.

People still aren't helping me. They just think I can do it myself. Someone even told me to get off the computer before it made me tired. Obviously if I spent these past weeks on my computer so much I forgot to eat and ended up starving and then panicking about what meal to make - I obviously cannot just do it myself.

This is what not believing someone has a disorder does.

I just have to do it myself which is going to be so bloody difficult. I still haven't set the Wii up - the Wii!

You can give me all the tips and recipes in the world and I still won't know what to do. I need to plan it but I plan so many other things it gets forgotten about. I think I will just make stir frys for life.

Stir fry (from: one package of sliced meat and one package of frozen vegetables) was one of the things I made most frequently because it required so little work or processing to assemble and cook. When I cooked most often, when I was with my ex.

It's... not really a bad thing (or wasn't for me) to have fairly regularly. The vegetables were nice.