How I found a relationship.

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"Very few of them", really? It depends on how you understand or use the word, and your immediate culture. perhaps I am using it wrong. I actually meant all the guys at Uni who were not confident cocky, social party animals. I didn't mean to use it just to mean computer/techie/gadgets fans, perhaps thats what it means? In the UK these days I think its meaning has changed quite a lot, perhaps more brainy folk/interested in stuff in detail (any stuff), not so interested in shallow stuff with some social ineptness thrown in, but not as a perjorative. I rather meant to celebrate brains, depth, etc. winning over more shallow traits.

Maybe they're socially inept compared to you. NTism is a spectrum too .

I work in the IT industry, most of my coworkers are programmers and engineers, they're all typically geeks. Socialization is not their best asset , true, and they're not cocky and social party, true, but they have friends and girlfriends and healthy social life, they're way socially aware and don't lack much the NT common sense.

So yea, *very few* of them have serious impairment in social skills.

To me, I view them as normal.

So do I. Its relative. I am fondly considered a massive geek by those I work with.

Last edited by pastafarian on 03 Jan 2012, 8:03 am, edited 1 time in total.

Yup, I'm looking at those people who want people they don't know basically to look after them and be a doormat for them. Not for me, thanks.

And the same goes the other way - women shouldn't have to settle for people who have children who will use them and sleep around either.

It was just a massive leap, thats all. I was talking about a young woman discovering that the confident cocky guys who were her initial interest, aren't necessarily those who'll give her what she wants from a relationship - so her then going on to be more interested in geeks. Just seen a lot of slower starting geeks end up with the best relationships.

You made my young woman a "cast off" and other stuff a mile away from where I was. I don't wan't to do the obvious wanky popular psychology (then goes on to do it) but to make a leap, apropros of nothing, suggests doormat 'issues' (as they say). I'm sorry if thats true, but I still think not wanting someones "cast-offs" sounds dehumanising I guess. Just a reaction.

I'm sort of referring to those women who wants someone steady and stable to use whilst still seeing those "confident, cocky" guys on the side. Basically a selfish cow with no thought for anyone else.

I myself wouldn't say no to a woman who has been with those "confident, cocky" guys and knows that us geeks can perhaps offer her a better deal.

I hope that might explain it.