Having meltdown's with a close friend

Post Reply New Topic

I have a friend who recently got married a year and a half ago and although I am happy for her, sometimes I feel like the grass is greener on her side of the fence now. Even though I know it's not true, it sure seems that way.

I think I am jealous of my friend and even if she doesn't drive, her husband drives a nice sport's car and so she gets to see all kinds of neat places with him even if it's no where exotic. I also felt like she has been in the spot light a lot lately in that she's been able to do this or that.

-She got to go to a ball that I really like being involved with because I did some things in the past
-She got featured in a paper for volunteering at the same place for 10 years
-She got to be the lead in a play
-She lives in a nice neighborhood by a train line and I wish I had that opportunity

I am also feeling clingy to her and this usually happens around holiday times when she and her husband talk about going out of town to see family, while I hardly talk to mine for various reasons.

While I am trying my hardest to be humble and not let this get in the way of my own life, it still hits me really hard.

usually i noticed when my friends became jealous of me they stopped calling up or reduced interaction.
my sis - in - law is jealous that she has only girl child whereas i have a son, she keeps bringing up the topic again and again.
when i notice that people around me are jealous i try to avoid them they sound so scary to me.

i know it must be hurting you to see that your friend as got so many opportunities and she is in limelight
if its really hurting maybe you should just avoid her or find another friend (which is difficult for us aspie)

I automatically hate your sister-in-law for being sexist and evil. Maybe I'm biased, but I have no patience for sexism.

I think you should just try to push past your jealousy and realize that you have things that she doesn't have, too. Jealousy should be overcome and ignored, not reveled in.

Oh I did too. She sounds ungrateful.

As for my friend, I love her dearly, it's just touches my buttons greatly whenever someone like that gets one opportunity after another while I feel like I am going through a dry time.

Although, she sometimes can appear to be a real snob and seems to use her marriage to act superior to me or that is the way that I view it. She also hasn't very warm and fuzzy towards me as I would like her to be. Instead, she is suggested that I continue talking to my counselor when I really feel like I need emotional support right now. Maybe that's a little selfish on my behalf. I am not depressed or anything but it just sometimes seems that ever since she's gotten married that she can treat ME any old WAY that she wants. I also sometimes feel like she's think she's better than I am.

Yeah sometimes the part that irks isn't that you had it so bad, it's that someone else obviously had it so good.

That is exactly how I am feeling right now is that she seems to have it really good.

For one, the biggest one is not about having a special someone myself, it's like I am mad at her for getting married and my jealously is that her husband is now in the picture to fill her every needs.

i dont have jealousy she has, since she keeps on bringing up the topic again and again.
about being sexist here in india there is pressure to have a male heir for the family which she seldom could not produce so she is whining in pity. she as become a sadist.
i never brought up topic about the children

I usually cut myself off from the rest of the world whenever I have meltdowns because most of my NT friends would not understand and probably think I am a freak and a psycho and not want to hang out with me anymore. At least thats how I think they would react.