Post your nerdiest joke(s)

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Q: A hunter walks one mile south, one mile east and one mile north in that same order. He ended on the same place. What did he hunt?

A: A polar bear.

trying to make some up but i am not in the mood much....

Q: what do tee-totalling puritan nymphomaniacs and the number 15 have in common?
A: they are both square roots.

(could have used any number there but people will wonder about the "15" bit and i will never tell them)

Q: How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None. It's a hardware problem.

I actually LOL'ed to this!

He asks for H2O too. Makes no sense with a number 2 there.

fiber@bundle:~$ nice ./joke
nobody likes joke
Segmentation fault

i is a hypocrite!

I hope art nerds are acceptable.

How many surrealists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two, one to hold down the giraffe and the other to fill the bathtub with brightly painted bicycles.

A Higgs Boson walked into a bar and most of the customers gathered around him.

A Higgs Boson told the Priest "I am the only reason you Catholics can say Mass"

Oh these are too funny! Love the one with the doctors especially. However there are no biology jokes! Let me change that with a cheesy pick-up line I learned from a lecturer (say it aloud to get the pun, I did it this way so those who are not familiar with genetics will get it):

If I were an enzyme, I'd be helicase, because I'll unzip your genes.

I would tell you a UDP joke, but you might not get it.

Guy asks a girl: Do you know Assembly? She answers: NOP.

http://www.sanitarium.net/jokes/getjoke.cgi?71

The error messages on modern versions of Bash differ on some of them, but it's still funny.

That's true. If you know Mallard is a type of duck, have seen your share of old Disney cartoons, and have heard of a classical composer named Gustav Mahler you can get the joke "What do you get when you cross Gustav with Daffy? A Mahlered Duck."

Daffy is the Warner Brothers Looney Tunes duck.

Donald is the Disney duck!

Get your ducks in a row please!

I'm not a real geek but I play one on the internet

16 sodium atoms walk into a bar followed by batman





why did the programmer quit his job? because he couldn't get a raise

a man's wife just gives birth so he asks the doctor "is it a boy or a girl"?
the doctor says "yes"

java programmers wear glasses because they don't C#

#wife {
right: 100%;
margin:0;
}
//not really a joke but cute

#titanic {
float:none;
}

#santa {
padding:100%;
}

#fear {
display:none;
}




installed linux, we had a bash

There's no place like ~