I can't stand people anymore.

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Okay so I'm not completely sure this belongs here but I have a few questions.

I started university this week. I'm not moving in to my room (in a dorm or whatever it's called) until Saturday next week so until then I'm staying at a "friend's" house. I really don't like staying at other people's houses. It's chaos since it completely messes with my routines. Right now, for example, I'm sitting in the sofa extremely tired. I'm tired because of Uni and because I haven't been able to be by myself in a week now (drives me crazy) since I live here. Even though my "friend" and her housemate know I'm very tired they are sitting here talking loudly and watching a movie. That means I can't go to bed (I'm supposed to sleep in the tv room). That makes me annoyed. I know it's their place but I just wish they could show some respect because they really don't (not only tonight). I'm getting annoyed. Really annoyed. I'm also freaking out since I'm not able to be by myself. I just want to be left alone.

I find it very difficult to be around people lately. They annoy me. They are loud, the invade my personal space, they don't care, they never really say what they mean or mean what they say and they keep being generally annoying. The longer it's been since I've been by myself the worse I feel, and the worse I feel the angrier I get. Is that "normal"? I mean, do you expertise this as well? Also, how do I survive another 9 days here? Another 9 days without solitude and without enough sleep. I feel like screaming and smashing things and yell at people. Why do I feel these things? I'm trying to understand. People around me don't seem to be bothered by these things. Why do people drive me insane? I just want to be left alone.

Writing this on my phone so I'm sorry for the typos (if there are any).

My phone won't let my edit my previous post so I'll just add this: I've always been very introverted and socially anxious but it's getting harder and harder to be around people.

Also, I meant to write experience not expertise in my last post.

I experience what you are experiencing when I am not able to have solitude, so I think it is perfectly normal (for folk like us, anyhow). I live with my husband and absolutely adore him and enjoy spending time with him. But not all my time. He often goes out in the evening with friends which gives me the house to myself, and I work 3 days a week so the Mon/Fri I have home alone while he is at work. Without that solitude I would go completely nuts ... when we are together non-stop (like when we go away on holiday) I start feeling like you are and that is about my lovely husband ... not just "friends".

So I don't think there is anything wrong with your reaction, especially given that you are under stress from the new environment of Uni.

You need to find some way to have solitude. As it is their house you might have to suffice with finding solitude outside the house... not ideal but you need to find a way to get through the next 9 days. Long walks? A quiet park bench, a flask of tea and a good book? If they have a bath... can you take over the bathroom for an hour and have a long, solitary bath?

Wish you luck.

Seems like you have made it a bit difficult for yourself. With no possibility to be by myself I would have had the exact same experience. I have had a kind of the same experience at university actually. There is just so much going on when university is starting, that everything tend to escalate, new situations, new people, intruding your normal comfort zones. I would not survive if I did not have the choice to be all by myself and "reset" and think. I would have been so annoyed with people around me and got the same feelings as you describe here. I think the only way is to find a way to be all by yourself, or else this will continue. And maybe escalate further. I would think. Or you can just cope with, if that is possible. I doubt it will get better.

I lived in university halls myself for a long time and it was hell, not only because of the awful layout, the communal showers and my jerk housemates but also because of similar experiences you are having now.

Universities however have lots of interest and hobby clubs and are probably the best opportunity an autistic or aspie will get to make friends.

My advice is to get together with some like-minded people and rent a house privately as it feels more like 'your home' and gives you a chance to cultivate a routine when there's fewer people about or people that are less inclined to press your buttons. You will enjoy your time at university so much more.

Sorry, this website's a bit weird on my phone so I can't really quote you.

Anyway, I'm freaking out. All I want to do is to scream, smash things, completely destroy whatever it is that's making the squeaking noise I'm hearing right now, hit my head, cry, rock back and forth and yell at people. I feel loads of negative emotions stiring up on the inside. Feels like there's a major meltdown and/or shutdown coming any time now. I can't cope with this. The movie's over now and they're still sitting in here being annoying. Sad thing is that these things make me dislike my "friend". Is that normal?

I can't move in to a private house. I don't know any like-minded people and I can't afford living someplace else. I hope it gets better when I move in to my actual room Saturday next week.

I'm sorry but I feel like I'm going to explode. I've never had a meltdown in front of other people. But now I don't know. I'll at least shut down soon.

Maybe the easiest thing would be to talk to your friend, just say nicely that you are tired and would like to go to bed please. I have found that direct confrontation and just stating what you need (very nicely) usually is the best way. When I have done this people have been very understanding. I hope it works out!!

I think your only option is to go on a lot of long walks until things settle down. It's a way to create some alone time, and you can work off some of the anxious feelings.

It will get better when you get your own room.

I've told them I need to sleep pretty much every night. It's past midnight now and I'm supposed to go to Uni tomorrow. It's incredibly difficult starting uni (loads of changes etc) and not being able to come home and "recharge" and just think about things. Alone.

I have been on walks and I've been locking myself in the bathroom to get away for a few minutes. Doesn't work because as soon as I get back here I get annoyed and/or angry again.

Why is social interaction so difficult (serious question)? I don't even know if I have AS but it's still one of the most difficult things in my life.

EDIT: Also, on Saturday they're going to have a party here. With people I don't know. In the room where I'm supposed to sleep

Too much noise and too many people without enough downtime is very wearing on the soul. Been in that situation in the past and it was not fun. Lack of sleep, IMO, is the biggest source of stress. You're asking why you feel these things. i can only speak from personal experience. It is harder when on the spectrum, because much more effort is required to keep the social situation from derailing, i.e. stopping people from being mad at you or whatever. The stress from all of that effort, day after day is exhausting. It does not come naturally to most of us.

Just count the days until you are out of this situation. At least it is only temporary. Just imagine if you were stuck in some sort of apartment living situation with no way out. You may find after it all, how sweet your privacy will feel once you are out of there. So perhaps one way of coping is just knowing that it will end soon

I like quiet dogs.

I never could.