scale of -10 to +10, how do you feel right now?

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3.5

-5. Feel distant, disconnected from things, rather sad and lost.
I think I'm just all out of sorts with my routine being out of whack and mulling over too many things. Blergh.

7/ 1/2 tired as heck

-4

exams, again. extremely uneventful, these last few days. have a bigass form to fill out.

they're both gone at the same time.

and i don't have my lapis next to me.

Probably 4 currently. On one hand I feel relieved yesterday's doctor's appointment has reduced my health anxieties, on the other hand I've been fairly riled up today encountering some fool on the net with a vile love of eugenics.

Probably about a -8. Not much going right for me.

4 as I feel somewhat down,but less depressed than before despite harder job prospects for me in UK than ever with lack of support in my local community.

-8 / 10

I feel anxiety has ruined my life

buspar?

I'll ask about it but they don't like treating anxiety in me cause of the potential to "abuse" which hell I am doing right now on meds that aren't even designed to treat anxiety

buspar is the only non-addicting anxiety med. they shouldn't have a problem with it. main thing to know is that it takes a few weeks to get the effects, so don't give up too soon.

I am pretty skeptical of that but I'll try it, got an appointment on the 3rd

About a 5 and a half.

-3.


BUhhhhhhhhh. it'd be even lower if i hadn't scheduled an appointment with (one of) the school's personal counselor(s) for early tomorrow morning. that alone is enough to calm me down - if i had my lapis with me, i might even be better. i think i'll get some right now...

i love her, but i don't want her to see me moan and whine. almost 20 years old, dammit. CUT IT OUT.

you need to learn to be satisfied with what you are, and stop fixating so much on what you want to be in some vague future.

....he says. haranguing himself with his fingers. the emotional mind's CEO dismisses it, hiding in a corner, terrified of any replacements who may finally steer the ship in the right direction.

Approx 3.5; was worse having spent the week suffering Gastro-enteritis; it's pretty much gone now, but still have to have the rest of the week off work, 'just in case' I still am contagious!! ! On a happier note today is my birthday so am relatively happy; visit to London on Saturday with wife (who's Easter present I got today in prep!! !) Other than that, still somewhat depressed that I didn't get the job I interviewed for last Wednesday, but also petrified of going back i as I need to discuss the outcome with my manager. (Not sure whether or not I disclosed about my Autism or not?!) S so pretty much same old same old at the mo...;/

0. My general mood is way better (probably due to taking antidepressants), and I'm enjoying things again for the first time in months, but still not much is going right for me.